Park That Car... but not in MY Spot!

I already covered in a previous post that I knew when we were getting close to that night’s Amway meeting by the clunker cars - circa 70’s and 80’s BMW’s and Cadillacs - parked on the street.

The meetings took place at different houses - whichever IBO that the Platinum decided had earned the privilege of his presence. A lot of the newer neighborhoods where IBO’s were renting have small driveways - fit two cars - and if the garage is full of storage stuff the residents park in the driveway and visitors/tenants have to park on the street. In these neighborhoods both sides of the streets are packed with cars. Multi car families or social butterflies with lots of visitors, who knows but sometimes we had to drive over a block away to find a spot. I live in an older neighborhood where the houses are on good sized lots and good sized driveways. I have one of the smaller driveways around because my house is closer to the street and I have a backyard, whereas most of the other houses are set further back from the road and they have huge front yards. I can park four cars in my driveway.Hardly anyone parks cars on our street unless there’s a big party going on somewhere, and even then our boulevards are wide enough that cars can park off the street without affecting traffic.

We had three Amway meetings at our house until the Platinum refused to do any more meetings here because none of our prospects ever showed up. For those three times Ambot made a huge deal that one parking spot in our driveway was reserved for the Platinum sack of shit or whoever was driving him because he didn’t always drive his own car. One time our arrogant prick sponsor got the last spot in our driveway. Ambot asked him to move his car out on the street so the Platinum could park there. Man was that fucker MAD! He screeched his piece of shit car out of our drive and put it on the street. Then he stomped back inside and glared at everyone. Ugly ass son of a bitch looked ANGRY for the next three hours that he was stuck at our house while the sack of shit Platinum droned out another bored plan.

At every house where an Amway meeting was being held the IBO held space in their driveway for the Platinum or his driver. Even when it was street parking only one IBO would get there early enough to get a parking spot near the house and when the Platinum arrived the IBO would move his car so the Platinum could park.

Our Platinum was often late for 8pm meetings. Not overly late, probably never more than 20 minutes. One time Ambot got the “privilege” of driving the sack of shit to a meeting and he told me what was up. Ambot arrived at the house on time but there was nobody outside waiting to greet the Platinum so he told Ambot to keep driving. Hunh? He needs a greeter? What does he think he is? The King of England? Yeah, probably! So Ambot is driving him around the neighborhood listening to the sack of shit rant about how nobody was outside waiting for him to arrive. Ambot made three passes in ten minutes and said the Platinum was just about to ask him to drive him home when somebody finally showed up in the driveway waiting for them.

So that was the main topic of the Platinum’s rant that evening. Its not so much that he wanted “anyone” out there waiting for him to drive up, it had to be at least a thousand pin or higher. Hmm. That would be kind of scarce in our group!

And if it was raining? An IBO had to be standing out there with a big umbrella waiting for the Platinum. I mean God help him if he got wet. I’m a little tougher. I can take the rain!

As I see it? Platinums might melt in the rain but nothing stops Anna Banana!

Put all Your Eggs in one Basket!

There’s another saying that I don’t recall hearing at any Amway meeting and it has to do with not putting all of your eggs in one basket.

Actually the only time I remember that phrase being used was by our arrogant prick sponsor who said when he’s recruiting prospects that he starts putting fear into people about their job and how he hopes they don’t have all their eggs in one basket because they’ll be finished.

Well what else do you expect from a rotten little bastard like him?

Diversify! A word that shall never be spoken at an Amway meeting because the activities involved in diversifying take away time and dollars from the cult leaders efforts to earn an income doing the Amway thing. Instead the opposite is taught: put all your eggs in one basket. The one that belongs to the Amway hen house!

Basically diversifying means investing in a variety of assets and spreading the risk around in case one venture fails there are other assets on the go that might turn out better. Before diversifying its a good idea to figure out your own risk tolerance and how much money you can afford to lose should things not work out so good.

For example in Amway, be prepared to “invest” at least $10,000 a year on Amway products, attending functions, and buying tools. If you’ve got a better use for that $10,000, I recommend that’s the road you take!

Say someone has $150 kicking around in a savings account and an IBO is trying to get them to “invest” in their own business as an Amway IBO. The person doesn’t want to risk all their $150 in Amway and in this case is probably ignorant of the hundreds of dollars on top of that to buy Amway products and attend Amway functions because you don't find that out until after you've been sucked into the lies. On the other hand that $150 is only getting half a percent interest in the savings account. But that person might be comfortable risking $100 of that $150 into 100 shares of a stock that’s currently selling for $1 a share. The worst thing that can happen is the stock takes a nosedive and they lose their $100 but not all is lost because they still have $50 sitting in the bank’s savings account. Or the stock might take off and at the end of the year is worth $25 a share.

When considering diversifying, a homeowner might decide to invest in a second house using the equity in their main residence as a down payment and renting out the other house - hopefully for a few bucks more than the mortgage. In twenty years the mortgage will be paid off. At this point the owner has the choice of continuing to rent the house and all the rental income is now profit with some deductions for city taxes and general maintenance as the house gets older and things like the roof and hot water tank need to be replaced. It now becomes residual income, more than most IBO’s will ever see! Or else the house can be sold and the equity is profit to the owner.

Some people who are incredibly talented and lucky make a living playing poker or gambling, investing in the stock market, or flipping houses.

Whatever they’re doing they’ve found a way to diversify. Words that never should be spoken at an Amway meeting! Probably because when people are looking at their investments and figuring out which ones they should cut loose, they start with whatever one is losing money.

Here’s a laugh. Our arrogant prick sponsor told us he’s always looking for ways to diversify his income, talking about investments. This son of a bitch who’s always behind on his bills, is a renter always under the threat of eviction, drives old beater cars, and never has any money. Diversify what income! What disposable income does he have lying around? I think finding ways to invest would be an impossibility for him. Its always nice to dream though.

Oh wait. That’s what Amway’s all about. Dreams!

I decided a long time ago that the great Amway dream is a bunch of bullshit. I have better ways of making my money work for me.

Loud and Clear?

A few years ago Ambot and I were eating at a restaurant and three motorcyclists pulled into the parking lot. One of the bikers had a spike instead of a back seat behind him. That message was loud and clear: “No passengers!”

How about the messages we got from our upline? Were they loud and clear?

Every Amway meeting we attended whether it was at someone’s house or an auditorium our sponsor and upline would be hanging around with cell phones plastered to their ears or sending text messages. They’d glance at us and turn their backs. The message is loud and clear: “The other end of my phone is more important than you!”

How loud and clear was it when our arrogant prick sponsor said that even if you don’t make money at Amway you will be a better person from the associations you make from the Amway business and be a better person. And that fucker wasn't the only one who said shit like that.

I mean what the fuck? Why would I want to become a business owner to not make money? Why do I want to become a better person from associating with people in the Amway business? I can become a better person by volunteering at the hospital. And maybe I’m about as nice a person right now as I’ll ever be. I don’t need Amway to show me any more sickening nicey nice.

Is this line our sponsor used loud and clear? “We’ve got something that’s recession proof, are you interested, we can go for coffee.”

No that ain’t loud and clear. Its pretty vague. And I don’t like coffee so fuck off.

How this for another Amway line? “I can’t promise you nothing but would the potential of an extra 70 grand a year interest you?”

Well yeah most people would be interested in an extra 70 grand a year. But the most honest thing you said was not promising nothing. That part comes through loud and clear to me. Nothing in Amway is still nothing except for a whole lot of debt.

How about when our sponsor insulted a prospect of Ambot’s because he’s 45 years old but due to his age he’s a hard sell due to his previous knowledge of Amway.

That’s loud and clear to me too. If the prospect (who is younger than Ambot) is “too old” at 45 THEN SO IS AMBOT!!!!

How come the arrogant prick sponsor isn't getting my message loud and clear? I don't like you and I don't want nothing to do with you!!! How have I failed at communicating that to the arrogant prick for 20+ years??? Or is he just that fucking dense? Or is he nothing more than a fucking troublemaker, accelerated by Amway.

One thing that is loud and clear to me is the number of bloggers and commenters who take to the Internet getting their story out there. Hopefully Amway recruits are doing some research before they plunk down their $150 registration/starter kit fee. It seems that more people do their research after they’ve been involved in Amway for awhile and aren’t making any money to see if there is actually any hope at this business. And then they see it. Story and story about people who have lost money, lost their homes, got into huge debt, divorces all thanks to their involvement in Amway.

The message is loud and clear. Stay away from Amway. It will poison your life.

Did Ambot have an Amway Business Plan?

For people who have taken small business ownership/entrepreneur courses one of the things we’re taught is to create a business plan. We’re also told that we should be pulling out our business plan every 6 months or every year and looking it over and making any changes in our services, products, goals, etc.

For all the Amway business meetings we attended and all the lack of real business advice that was never given (silly us to actually expect to receive good business advice at a “business meeting”!) never once did I hear any Platinum, Emerald, or Diamond speaker tell the IBO’s to create a business plan. The only “plan” ever discussed was to “duplicate your upline”.

Yeah well that don’t really cut it in the real life business world. If you see a bank officer about a loan you will need to bring a business plan and financial statements with you and not your upline Eagle who had to take time off his ditch digging job and is still wearing his grubbies to accompany you to the bank to share this exciting opportunity where the money will be rolling in faster than it can be counted. Don’t need no stinking business plan when you bring a sharp Amway businessman along with you!

Ambot never created a business plan for Amway therefore there was no plan for success.

Our real business plan for our real business was 50 pages long but depending on the complexity of the business and products or services offered other business plans could be much longer.

Business plans - your business blueprint - your plan for success - generally follows the same pattern:

1. Executive summary - the name of your business, address, owners, and summarizes what the business does, who the customers might be, and expenses. These will be covered in more detail later in the business plan.
2. Business philosophy - description of industry, description of the business, vision statement, mission statement, business goals
3. Operations plan - business structure, human resources structure, production methods, service delivery, strategic alliances, risk assessment, licenses, insurance, and regulations.
4. Marketing plan - products or service description, industry analysis, competitive analysis, target market description, market strategies, selling strategies
5. Financial Plan - projected cash flow, projected income statement, balance sheet, personal financial information
6. Appendices - action plan, resume, business outline, etc.

None of the above was ever taught during any Amway “business meeting”.

I did a Google search for a business plan MLM company selling soap and I actually got some hits. I was even curious enough to look at one. The company had a different business name but for all I know it was a pseudonym for Amway.

Serious business owners create business plans. For all the talk I heard about Amway IBO’s being “serious business builders” I never heard of anyone in our LOS who put together a business plan. I’m not saying its impossible for a serious Amway business builder to create a business plan but I doubt it will fly especially when it will be full of Amway speak learned from their upline, tapes, and CD’s instead of legitimate business information. Imagine filling in the competitive analysis portion of the business plan. Here’s where the IBO compares prices of similar products already established in the marketplace. The best they can do is show that similar products are sold at Costco and Wal-Mart for a lower price. “Oh but our products are much higher quality and that gives them an edge in the marketplace.” Subjective, debatable, and doubtful. And the bank loans officer doesn’t give a shit.

If you want to be considered a serious business owner, choose a legitimate business, create a business plan, present it to others, and get feedback on how likely success will be in this venture. Ambot never created an Amway business plan to show to other people - friends, family, business owners, and bankers to get objective third party opinions before slapping down $150 for the Amway registration and starter kit. I’d say his experience is similar to most Amway IBO’s.

What do they say about the importance of having a business plan? If you fail to plan, you plan to fail.

Likewise if you get involved with Amway no matter what you plan - you will fail.

No Business Advice

When it came to Amway our upline gave us no decent legitimate business advice. We went to all these “business meetings” and nothing useful about being a real business owner was ever divulged. Just because someone pays $150 to register as an Amway IBO, puts on a business suit, carries a cell phone, and shows up for meetings does not make them a “business owner”. A real business owner makes their own decisions about when and where they work, their pricing, and business policies. A bunch of fakers with pretend Amway businesses go to meetings when their upline says they have to go, have no control over the product prices and have no control if Amway decides to terminate them as an IBO.

Yeah! Freedom! Business Owner!

Try commissioned salesperson. That’s all Amway IBO’s are. Remember the whole “cut out the middleman” speeches you hear at Amway meetings and on tapes/CDs? Think about it. Who is really the middleman? The IBO.

How many commissioned salespeople out there would stay with the same company if they were only earning $10 a month? They’d either quit and find something more saleable to market or the employer would fire them.

Going to business meetings where the speaker (Platinum) goes off on rants that have nothing to do with Amway or any other business, talks about their relationship with God (I’ve never attended a business meeting with a legitimate company where religion comes up), and shows a presentation telling people to eat one meal bar and drink one Amway drink daily to become financially free just doesn’t cut it.

Business advice consists of being CORE and duplicating your upline. Takes up less than 1% of the “business meeting”. Well what do you expect after spending 2 hours ranting about the no show IBO’s and losers who have J.O.B.s and religion. Doesn’t leave too much time to actually talk about Amway.

You know what else is less than 1%? The amount of IBO’s who break even or make some income at Amway. Wow! What a great business opportunity where 99% of IBO’s don’t make money and/or lose money!

Seeing as how being an Amway IBO is just a pretend business lets think big and pretend an IBO is a top notch Amway salespersonand has a good sized downline or customer base and is earning around $1000/month. Its not enough to live on if you have a mortage and want to eat and pay your other bills but its a decent side income. Most IBO’s think that’s a nice starting point in their Amway business and Ambot was one of them who thought for sure he’d be making $1000/month after 3 or 4 months in “the business”. The reality for most IBO’s is that’s an unattainable level because the odds are stacked against them in a system designed for failure. But seeing as how this is a pretend business lets just pretend that’s the monthly tally.

In the Amway meetings I attended the Platinum or Diamond speaker would entice the newcomers in the audience by asking what they could do with an extra $800 or $1000 a month. They could pay down debt and put it to their mortgage or save it for a down payment on a house. What about that vacation you want to take? You’ll have saved enough in a few months to take it. The speakers, aka cult leaders, make it sound how easy it would be to make that much money. They say you start with yourself and eat a food bar and drink an Amway beverage daily. Then you find 2 people who can do what you do. And over the next 4 months you add an extra person each month and after 6 months you’ll be earning $1000/month.

Eat and drink your way to financial freedom!

You know there was a reason why my father never invested in a candy shop or donut shop and that was because we’d eat all the profits!

The advice given by phoney businessmen is that’s the way to do things - eat those profits!

I come to the conclusion that the main reason our sack of shit Platinum did not give IBO’s concrete advice on what to do with our Amway earnings was because he knew 99% of us would never make money with Amway and within 2 years he’d be talking to a whole new group of faces therefore he doesn’t need to upgrade his speeches to keep up with the times. Just keep recycling the same old bullshit for people who haven’t heard it before.

Yeah! We’re all gonna be rich! Despite the lack of real business advice.

No business advice = a business that likely won’t succeed.

How to Listen to Amway Tapes

OK. Who would do a search titled “how to listen to Amway tapes”?

Umm. You put the tape into a cassette player, push the play button, and listen to it?

Years ago I worked for a company that was located in a 5 story building. A couple of other companies had offices in the our building. I was down on the main floor bringing some work to the receptionist and probably chatting for a few minutes. A couple walked across the lobby and got into the elevator. The man - in his 20’s - held the door open, poked his head out, and called over:

“Which button do I press for the third floor?”

“Three?” The receptionist suggests in the tone she uses when dealing with idiots.

The elevator door closes and we break down laughing.

OK well maybe you had to be there....

Perhaps this poor lost IBO has already asked his upline that question and didn’t get a satisfactory answer so he now takes to the Internet in his quest to find that information and ends up at my post about Amway CD’s and tapes.

“How to listen to Amway tapes?”

Hmm, maybe you should be drunk first? Turn the volume way down so you don't piss off anyone else within earshot. Do whatever it takes not to get brainwashed by that shit. A better plan would be to burn them.

I wonder if IBOFB is reading this post. He’ll be shitting his pants demanding who has got their hands on Amway tapes because he claims they went out with the last century.

How to Quit Amway

A recent searcher ended up on my blog looking for information on how to quit Amway.

I think that’s a sad state of being brainwashed by the Amway cult that someone has to seek out information on the Internet on how to quit Amway.

The logical response that comes to my mind, in no particular order:

1. stop attending Amway meetings

2. stop listening to CD’s

3. stop buying Amway products

4. don’t renew your membership at year end

To sum it up - Don’t have nothing to do with those bastards anymore. Nothing means NOTHING!

Seeing as how the Platinum or Diamonds used to refer to Amway as a shopping mall on the Internet - stop shopping there. Simple. Its no different than if you get pissed off at Safeway for some reason - you don’t go back. You quit shopping there.

Its an easy thing for me to say who had no interest in Amway, didn’t want to buy their shitty overpriced products, disliked our sponsor and ultimately disliked everyone upline.

Someone like me is going to have no problem quitting these bastards.

As hard as I find it to comprehend, I recognize that there are actually people out there who liked Amway and liked the people in their line of sponsorship. Getting sucked into the Amway cult didn’t happen overnight and quitting won’t be an easy overnight process for them either.

For some people it is a difficult, painful process quitting Amway because of the way they’ve been brainwashed and their thought process has been manipulated by their cult leaders. They’ve been in meetings where their cult leader has ranted about the latest IBO who has quit. Loser, pariah, quitter, etc. They order the cult followers in their downline not to have anything more to do with this person. The IBO knows if they quit they will be the main topic of their cult leader’s rant at the next Amway meeting.

Here’s a Youtube video about former cult member (Moonies) turned therapist Steve Hassan. http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=CApMzIX46kw

He’s being interviewed by Eric Sheibeler, author of Merchants of Deception and they’re discussing the Amway cult. The links to part 2 and 3 videos are found on this Youtube page. Hassan has written a couple of books that might be helpful to people wanting to leave Amway. It might be worth checking out at the library or purchasing for anyone who is having difficulty leaving Amway.

Amway is no different than any bad habit that one is trying to quit. Some people can go cold turkey. Others have to take quitting in smaller steps until it is no longer something that control their lives.

I send good luck and best wishes to anyone trying to deprogram themselves from the Amway cult and hope the quitting process isn’t too painful. Anyone in your upline gives you a hard time send them to my blog and tell them to leave a comment and I'll take care of them!

Searchers who end up at Anna Banana’s Blog

I get a lot of interesting and not so interesting Google searches that end up at my Married to an Ambot blog. Some searchers are looking for something completely unrelated to Amway and they usually leave as soon as they’ve realized their mistake. I get a few horrified IBO’s who end up here too. Most leave but a few stick around long enough to leave an Amway speak comment about how we didn’t try hard enough.

I get some searches where I say to myself, why the fuck is someone searching for that? Talk about brainwashed!

And I get people who are so  pissed off at Amway, end up at my blog, and literally spend hours reading every single post I’ve written.

What I love is my blog is high on the search engines for IBO’s who are seeking information about Spring Leadership and Dream Night. Nothing like screwing up Amway and WWDB! Of course right now its Spring Leadership that’s coming up in a couple of months and anxious IBO’s are seeking information. Instead everything high on the search are blogs similar to mine that tell what really happens at these Amway functions. We’re higher than the web pages of Amway and WWDB propaganda. What does that tell you? Us bloggers are gaining the edge getting the truth out there and getting more page views than the corporation! Yay us!

I also get a huge amount of searches looking for “Artistry Cosmetics” I’m right up there on the first page behind the Amway propaganda on Google. Doesn’t seem to bother Amway too much that I’m diverting their traffic otherwise they’d have offered to buy my blog.

A recent searcher typed in “Fuck Brad Wolgamott”. Hmm. I’m pretty sure I’ve never written that phrase! They ended up at my IBO’s are Free Labor post. Someone may have typed Brad’s name in the comments and of course my posts are full of fuck this and that so its logical to get a hit with that search criteria. I’m pretty sure I might have heard Brad Wolgamott speak at an Amway function though nothing about him stands out. Unmemorable experience for me and I have nothing to say about him. But I’m willing to help out that searcher and send out a big fuck you his way.

I get a lot of search hits for “Amway horror stories” or “Amway cult” or “cult horror stories”.

There’s a lot of people out there who don’t realize that Amway is a cult. I wouldn’t have thought so either until Ambot’s involvement and the brainwashing by his "Christian" Platinum cult leader.

I get searchers for creepy employees ending up at my Amway is Creepy post. Oddly enough I’m right below the hit for David Letterman is creepy for having sex with female employees!

I get a lot of searches for “quit Amway” or similar searches like how to get friend or husband to quit Amway. What about “big losses in Amway”? I get lots of searchers finding their way to my blog with that one too. “Annoying Amway IBO’s” in the search criteria find their way to my blog too!

Does Amway head office care that people are actually typing this stuff into search engines and coming to my blog? Do they not care that people think Amway IBO’s are annoying? Nope, not a chance. Amway head office = apathy central.

Sometimes I get people looking for an Amway IBO. Poor bastards must want to buy some overpriced Amway shit! Boy did they come to the wrong place! Well they could click on one of my Google ads that pop up from time to time, ad space purchased by Amway IBO's. Send a buck or two my way by clicking on an ad. That works for me!

What’s even more bizarre is that I get search hits for IBO’s looking for basic business information that their upline should but does not provide them with like “help with selling Amway products” or “how to hold an Amway Grand Opening”. Yup they get directed to my post about our Grand Opening and figure out real fast that no matter how much planning goes into it and how many people are invited, it’ll be a bust. I’m glad I’m getting that information out there. Don’t waste your time or money on an Amway Grand Opening!

I get 2 or 3 searchers each week looking for “how to say fuck in igbo”? They all end up at my Fuck You IBO post.

Am I the only person wondering what is igbo?

Google search! Ta da! Its a native tribe language in Nigeria.

I am the top hit for someone looking for the Igbo translation for fuck. I’m even higher on the search engine that the person who has this post: “Help! Why are my Igbo men rubbish in bed?”

Sorry I can’t help her with that one! Ha ha but I love it!

What’s really sad are the ambots who search for “World Wide Dream Builders is awesome”. Talk about brainwashed! I mean who is so infatuated with the scam that they type that into a search engine? The same type of brainwashed ambot who types in “Amway is awesome” and come to my blog thanks to the Youtube video called My Awesome Delicious Amway scam.

These must be new recruits in the early stages of the brainwashing process. Give them a year and they’ll be back doing searches like “Amway is a cult”, "Amway scam", “Amway sucks” and “lost money in Amway”.

How to Convince Your Husband to Quit Amway

I get a lot of Google hits on the above. I’m the top of the search results the last time I checked though I’m sure IBOFB will do his own investigation and find out that someone has since topped me.

That tells me there are a lot of desperate wives surfing the Internet who are fed up with the Amway bullshit.

The page on my blog being hit is a couple of stories I copied from elsewhere on the Internet about a couple of fed up wives who left their husbands, about 7 years apart who had almost identical stories. Neither story actually gives advice on how to convince your husband to quit Amway. They did what they had to do to protect themselves, their family, their finances, and their sanity. I’m not here to put any drastic ideas into wife’s heads. Women who’ve reached that point already know what they have to do to protect themselves.

I can’t offer substantial advice either other than wait it out and hope your husband is one of the majority who leaves Amway within the year when he finally figures out he’s not making any money. Everyone has different tolerance levels and bank account balances. What pisses off one woman might have little effect on another. Mostly what really pisses off women is the attitude adjustment their husband goes through due to involvement in the Amway cult. Sweet, sensitive husbands are turned into angry, ugly, sneering creatures who constantly criticize everyone who is not in Amway or supporting their Amway business.

What can she do? Here’s some suggestions that might help break a husband of his Amway habit.

1. Tell him dinner will now be served at 8pm each night. Be at the dinner table or go hungry. (He might launch a counter-attack by purchasing excessive amounts of Amway food bars to eat on the run.)

2. Whenever he has an Amway meeting planned tell him that you have sex pencilled in on the calendar for 8pm that night.

3. On Amway meeting nights host a party at your house. Even if its just a small gathering of family or friends. It will probably turn into an Amway bitch session.

4. Plan fun outings on nights when Amway meetings are on.

5. Book a night at a romantic hotel - something like a spa resort - on an Amway meeting night. Be prepared to go alone and enjoy a massage.

6. Tell him if he can’t be home by 10pm when you’re going to bed that he better not wake you up when he gets home and tell him to sleep in the spare bedroom or on the couch.

7. Start researching on the Internet how other people have been victims of the Amway scam. Knowledge is power.

8. Ask your husband if he’s aware that the income from tools is the main source of income for higher level pins. He needs to sponsor and keep active at least 100 IBO’s before he starts to make a profit.

9. Share with him some of the stories you’ve read on the Internet about people who’ve spent years and tens of thousands of dollars and still aren’t making money.

On the last 3 be prepared for him to launch a defensive counter attack full of Amway speak about how its not true.

For the rest of them hopefully the husband eventually realizes he's missing out on some good stuff and it might be more fun doing those activities than going to an Amway meeting.

Consistency. Don’t let him win the Amway fight.

The other thing that might work - and the threat of it is what finally worked for me - and here you’d have to consult an attorney to see if it will fly - threaten to sue the sponsor and upline and maybe Amway too for alienation of affection. In most law cases the person being sued is the husband’s mistress but other third parties have been successfully sued too for any participation they might have had in destroying the marriage.

Amway is of no interest to me though I can see how other wives would want to sue the company that causes a lot of pain. The only ones I wanted to hurt were the ones I don't like - the fucking assholes in the upline, the cult leaders who caused the emotional and financial distress. Ambot actually liked these people and didn’t want me to sue them plus he'd pretty much stopped going to Amway meetings by the time I was in talks with my attorney so it didn't take much to convince him to walk away. But I tell you I wish I had sued those bastards!!!! Well what I really want to do is rip those bastards nuts off for brainwashing my husband and trying to destroy our relationship. Suing them and causing them financial hardship would only be a distant second best!

There are wives out there who have sued their husband’s mistresses for alienation of affection. Amway is a mistress. I would love to hear of any lawsuits where a wife has sued Amway for alienation of affection. What a victory! That is someone I would love to meet who has the guts to tell this cult they've had enough bullshit. A Google search turns up no lawsuits like this but I think its just a matter of time before some fed up wife takes on the upline and/or Amway for alienation of affection and more power to her!

The Clunker Brigade!

Part of the bullshit taught at our Amway meetings was “fake it till you make it”. And always lie. All good little IBO’s must lie about how good business is going even when they’re losing hundreds of dollars each month. If they tell the truth they’d never recruit anyone.

IBO’s were also taught to look the part of successful business men and women. This meant putting on business suits, owning a cell phone with texting capabilities, attending all meetings, and driving high end cars to give off the appearance of a successful business person.

I’ve never been much of a car person. I like safe, reliable cars that don’t break down. Good gas mileage is something else I look for when buying a car. High end or low end, makes no difference to me. I’m no snob. 

In our group IBO’s were told to drive upper end cars like Cadillacs, Jaguars, and BMW’s. And most IBO’s did buy them - vintage 1970’s and 1980’s rust buckets. Cars that broke down all the time but what else do you expect from cars that have over 300,000 miles on them and probably only got regular engine maintenance for the first few years when they were owned by people who could afford them brand new and kept them in good shape.

I never saw so many junker cars than what our upline were driving. When there was a board plan at someone’s house the street would be littered with these old heaps so we knew we were getting close to our destination.

But that was what IBO’s were brainwashed into buying by our Platinum. He even insulted some people’s cars and called them “pimpmobiles” though they looked OK to me, just weren’t the "successful image" the bastard wanted the IBO to portray. The sack of shit Platinum wanted me to sell my newer model Toyata Matrix and buy an old BMW so we could say we owned one. I had zero interest in buying an older car that would probably cost me a lot in maintenance. I'd bought my car 3 months before Ambot signed up again with Amway and it took me awhile to find it and I was happy with it so I was NOT going to spend more time looking for another car so soon. At least I own a reliable car manufactured in this century. That’s more than the rest of you assholes can say! The sack of shit was especially annoyed one day when he looked in my car and saw we were carrying business supplies in there - our business that is, nothing to do with Amway. He told Ambot that my car was supposed to only be used for transporting people and Amway tools and products. I told Ambot to give him a message from me: “Tough shit.”

Somehow I doubt that message got passed along!

Amway meetings must have brought down the neighborhood’s house values with all the clunkers parked down the street thanks to the army of Amway warriors driving to business meetings in their IBO specials like Lincoln Town Cars with leaky sunroofs and bumpers held on with twine. IBO’s would carefully get out of their cars hoping the door with the rusty hinges wouldn’t fall into the street.

Driving a Beamer or Caddy that’s seen better days, dressed in a business suit, and clutching a cell phone doesn’t make a person a sharp, successful businessman no matter what fake image they are using to impress others. No matter what the sack of shit Platinum tells you it makes you look even worse driving an ugly gas guzzler that has a good chance of not starting when you turn the key in the ignition.

Yup living their fairy tale lives in the Amway land of make belief. A clunker of a high end car, the latest cell phone with huge monthly fees, and a business suit. Bunch of immature fools marching off to the latest Amway business meeting, ready to listen to more fairy tales and play “fake it till you make it” in a phoney business venture.

Amway Nightmares

Don’t you just hate it when you wake up and can’t get back to sleep again? Even more so when whatever you were just dreaming about keeps you awake thinking about it and then thinking about other things that may be connected to that dream.

Well last night was one of those nights for me or I should say early this morning.

I was dreaming that I was standing somewhere talking to a person when out of the blue someone shot them. I saw who it was. Our Amway cult leader so I decided to get the hell out of there ASAP. That was when he started chasing me and kept shooting. I eluded him for a long time and then he caught up and shot someone else who was near to me. Then the Amway cult leader tells me he’s shooting people who won’t listen to tapes and that he won’t shoot me as long as I go to this location and listen to a tape. And just so he knows I’m going to the location he gives this top to me to wear that has a recording device on it so he’ll know if I’m asking anyone for help so he can kill both of us. I remember getting to the location but didn’t listen to the tape before I made another getaway and woke up. Even in my subconscious I still refuse to listen to Amway tapes! Fortunately my Ambot was not in my dream so I know he wasn't killed. Yeah it was a bizarre dream with the cult leader killing anyone who wouldn’t listen to Amway tapes. The man chasing me didn’t look a thing like our Platinum cult leader. He looked more like another infamous cult leader - Charles Manson - except this one’s hair and beard were a lighter color.

When I read Eric Scheibeler’s book Merchants of Deception he stated that some of the Amway cult followers told him they would do anything for their hallowed leaders. Die for them. Kill for them. No hidden message here about the threats. He genuinely feared for his life and his family.

Its incredible the horrible acts that cult followers can be induced to commit that they never would have considered prior to joining the cult. I don't think Scheibeler's upline were all that different than my own.

At meetings our Platinum cult leader often told us about the guy who recruited him into Amway. I never met the guy. He had long since quit Amway. Several people upline of the Platinum had quit over 10 or 15 years so now the person directly above our Platinum was the Emerald because everyone else inbetween had dropped out. When the Platinum sack of shit told us about his sponsor he said he threatened him when he signed up with Amway. Told him that if he didn’t make any money at Amway then he would break the guys arms and legs. Sometimes he’d change the story slightly and say the guys arms and legs would be torn out. You know if it was me I wouldn’t go around bragging about something like that. If anything ever happened to that sponsor, even after all these years, who is the first person who’s going to be a suspect?

Our Platinum claims to be a good Christian and at every Amway meeting told us that God is number one in his life. I don’t know. Good Christians go around threatening to tear out people’s limbs if they don't make money in Amway?

For Christsakes we'd be running into one armed and one legged people everywhere we go!

Kind of like Jack the Ripper. This guy ought to be known as Platinum the Ripper.

I just thought it was kind of stupid of the Platinum telling us this story at all and especially telling it when we’ve got a tape recorder running. One of these things that could come back and haunt him. I think the Platinum used that story as a moral that he made money in Amway because its easy to make money in Amway, therefore his sponsor didn't need to go in for limb replacement surgery.

But is our Platinum really making any money? For all I know there's a guy somewhere out there who's had his arms and legs removed all in the name of Amway upline devotion.

The Products You Love!

Seeing as how its Valentine's Day I thought I'd inject a little love into this post!

“The Products You Love”.

Inspired by yet another Google Ad pretending not to be Amway. But I’m wise to these false advertisers now. The ad says free shipping on orders at least $99. Hmm, where have I heard that one recently?

The only way I’m clicking my way to yet another IBO’s Amway portal page is to give the blog writer a few extra bucks! And then I'm outta there!

I seriously doubt if I clicked on the link for “The Products You Love” that I would actually find anything I love available there.

Does Amway carry the things I love: chocolate coated strawberries (fresh not dehydrated!), mystery books written by my favorite authors, chocolate peanut butter ice cream, mango slushy bubble tea, puppies, seascape paintings, LA Gear sneakers...

Nope. Instead Amway carries a bunch of overpriced shit that I HATE!

There is absolutely no Amway product that I LOVE and MUST HAVE. Their fruit juices are about the only Amway product that I liked. Not love. Just like. I HATE their price tag though. I can buy juice at the grocery store for a fraction of the price Amway charges for their juice.

“The Products You Love”. Talk about false advertising. I’m almost tempted to click on the ad just to find the IBO’s contact information. They promised me products I love and right now I’d love some ice cream. And while I’m placing an order I’ll take the latest Stephen King novel, a Bon Jovi CD, and an English Setter puppy.

Then the IBO has to fess up and say they don’t sell those things.

What? You can’t provide the products I love? Fucking lying IBO! False advertising! How about I report you to Adsense? Why are you even doing advertising on the Internet anyway? Got some of those free $100 adsense coupons that are floating around? I thought Amway says you can’t do that kind of advertising. Must have gotten “permission”.

The only people who claim to love Amway products are brainwashed IBO’s. However once they quit Amway the love affair is over. They were only brainwashed into thinking they loved them during their Amway jail time.

If that IBO doesn’t want to be accused of false advertising he (she?) should change their slogan to “products you’ll hate at prices you’ll hate”. At least that now becomes truth in advertising. It might even intrigue people to click on the ad to see exactly what it is that they’ll be hating.

In closing I have a message to the owner of the "products you love" ad in the immortal words of Bon Jovi:

YOU GIVE LOVE A BAD NAME!

Mow My Lawn!

One day Ambot and I were in the car and Ambot pulls out his cell phone to call his beloved Platinum.

He asks him if his teenage son would like the job of mowing our lawn.

What the fuck! Ambot NEVER discussed this with me first. I’ve been mowing that lawn for a long time and Ambot has never given me any money when I’ve put the mower back in the shed and come into the house and now he wants to pay the fucking Platinum’s teenager to mow our lawn!

First off - Ambot never checked with about this before whipping out his phone. Probably because he knows I would have said NO!

Second - teenagers do NOT want to mow lawns. They have tons of other stuff they’d rather be doing. I sure as hell didn’t want to mow the lawn when I was a teenager.

Third - the Platinum lived on the other side of town. Who was going to drive his teenager to our house so he could mow our fucking lawn? I bet not daddy dearest. Ambot or more than likely me would be assigned that “privilege” of a 45 minute round trip.

Fourth - Ambot would have likely paid him some extravagant wage for spending an hour mowing our lawn like $40 or $50. If he paid me that I’d mow the lawn daily!

Fifth - I may  have hated mowing the lawn as a teenager but as an adult I know the exercise is good for me. I also take pride in keeping my property looking neat. Some teenager for hire isn’t going to give a shit what our lawn looks.

Fortunately the Platinum’s son is like every other teenager out there had ZERO interest in mowing a lawn and said hell no I ain’t doing it.

To this day I have no idea why Ambot was suddenly overcome with this sudden urge to phone the Platinum and offer to hire his kid to mow the lawn other than perhaps his skewed way of thinking this would earn him brownie points. I also have no idea why he felt this wasn’t something he should discuss with me first. I always mow the lawn so why the hell would Ambot even come up with this wonderful idea. I wasn't complaining about mowing the lawn and asking if someone else could mow it. Its not like Ambot is the one who is mowing our lawn and doesn’t like doing it and can’t convince me to mow it and is therefore forced to hire someone.

What I’m really surprised about is that the Platinum didn’t say: “You want MY son to mow YOUR lawn? Dude, you got that one backwards. I want YOU to mow MY lawn. I expect YOU to mow MY lawn twice a week to keep it looking good. And I’m not paying you any money for the privilege of mowing my lawn. I’ll give you one on one counselling after every ten times you mow my lawn. That is an incredible deal for you! Oh I forgot, I expect you to supply the gas for my lawnmower too.”

Fucking pompous sack of shit. Maybe that conversation DID take place and Ambot never told me. For all I know he WAS mowing that sack of shit’s lawn!

IBO’s Tossing in Grenades

Every now and then a brainwashed Amway IBO shows up to leave a comment on my blog or one of the blogs on my reading list to criticize us for having jobs, leading ordinary lives, not having anything better to do with our time, etc, etc.

A few days ago a cult follower named Jennifer left this comment after doing a Google search for “Amway is awesome” and ending up on a post I did about a video posted on Youtube called My Awesome Delicious Amway Scam. I think the writer is probably a young female, probably single. Speaking of having nothing better to do with her time she was on her iPhone doing the Google search. Maybe sitting in on a bored plan?

Jennifer said...

It's sad to see a wife knock her own husband and have nothing better to do than blog about him instead of supporting him... Who are you to judge?? What are you doing to make ur life better?? What is Amway hurting you?? Why don't you mind your own business instead of being consumed with others who are pursuing something better?? Who is the robot now who finds a following to knock business owners because you are too lazy to pursue it yourself.

Jennifer didn’t read any of my other posts. And she’s calling me lazy? Yeah right I’m a lazy ass business owner who knocks other business owners. Nope. The only people I know who knock down others are Amway independent business “owners” who refuse to accept that there are other business opportunities outside of Amway where owners can find happiness and a decent income. Jennifer’s questions would have been answered if she hadn’t been too lazy to read some of my posts.  

Isn’t it interesting how these Ambots show up to toss out Amway speak comments on blogs like mine and they all say the same thing parroting their upline. Every comment they’ve written I’ve heard my Platinum say the same thing dozens of times at Amway meetings. You can’t be original when it comes to Amway! The only answer these IBO's asked when confronted is to refer back to the upline. "My Platinum says its so and that makes it the truth."

Typical IBO behavior when they leave a comment full of Amway speak then can’t back up anything they’ve said with real facts when asked:

1. Name the Diamonds who are walking the beaches of the world and doing nothing else while residual income rolls in.
2. Explain why IBO’s - such as my husband - spend 100 hours easily a month on Amway related events but aren’t earning money.
3. Why do they accuse people who quit Amway as lazy or didn’t try hard enough.
4. Why do they refer to former IBO’s who claimed they didn’t make money that they weren’t in it long enough but can’t back up their statement to say how long you have to be in Amway to make money. I have visitors who say they were in 10, 15 years and CORE to the bone and they weren’t making any money at Eagle or higher pin level.
5. Why do they refuse to say how much they’re spending on Amway products and tools each month?
6. Why do they refuse to divulge the amount of the monthly check they receive from Amway.
7. They never say how many people they have sponsored who are still active IBO’s.
8. They never say how long have they been in Amway.

Its kind of like tossing in a grenade and then running.

Chickenshit IBO’s.

Dreams For Sale

This post is inspired by a Google ad that I’ve seen. “Buy dreams”. Interesting concept. Someone can’t think up their own dream so they have to buy someone else’s dream. I ought to try that as a sideline business. I need to think up some dreams, put a price tag on them, and start up an online store so that I can sell my dreams to someone suffering from a lack of dreams. The possibilities are endless of what I can think up that people might dream about: a yacht to sell around the world, a castle in Scotland, an island in the Caribbean, winning the Tour De France, climbing Mount Everest, a million dollars in the bank, a cure for cancer....

But that ad got me thinking about how Amway IBO’s are peddlers of dreams. IBO’s snag prospects by dangling dreams in front of them.

Once the IBO has the prospect hooked on imagining what it would be like to be financially free to afford their dream, then the whole Amway pitch comes out and if the dreamer is caught up in the hype they’ll fork over $150 for an Amway registration kit and then spend thousands of dollars chasing that elusive dream until they finally decide to cut their losses and walk away. Those same dreams are then used as weapons against the IBO when they’re quitting Amway.

“I guess your dream just wasn’t big enough,” taunts the upline.

Or maybe their dream was too big. Bigger than what they can make on an Amway income. Less than 1% of IBO’s make money in Amway. Our Platinum was always bragging that our Emerald’s income was in the top 25% of 1% of IBO’s. We now know those facts aren’t really impressive bragging rights at all. In his book Merchants of Deception, former Emerald Eric Scheibeler earned $35,000/year at his highest earning point. Based on what other former Emerald’s have said on the Internet about their income - about two or three thousand dollars a month - it would be a safe bet that our Emerald’s income was in that ballpark. That was my salary twenty years ago when I worked an office job in data entry. Its a nice average salary. I was able to buy a house and take vacations each year. That company offered the best benefits I’ve ever had in my life. 3 weeks paid vacation to start, increasing by a week after every 2 years employment, capping out at 10 weeks per year for long term employees which could be carried over to the next year. Shit there were some co-workers I didn’t see for months when management got after them to use it or lose it! Health and dental and retirement savings easily add thousands of dollars more in perks. Emeralds don’t get any of those perks. If they want them they have to dig deep in their own pockets.

Sometimes I can be a sucker. I clicked on the ad to see what kind of dreams are for sale.

There are no dreams for sale here. There are no nice houses, sports cars, luxury vacations. I don’t see any savings accounts holding millions of dollars. There is no world peace here either.

Instead I’m looking at pictures of that piss water XS, Nutrilite vitamins, SA8 laundry soap, and other Amway shit.

What the fuck? Talk about false advertising! I’ve hit some fucking IBO’s online store!

If you see that ad for “buy dreams” and click on it (and thanks by the way for putting another dollar into my bank account!) it takes you to an IBO’s portal page for flogging Amway products. You know the one they spend $50/month to World Wide Dream Builders or whatever LOS for premier membership and it includes that portal page in the monthly fee.

Don’t buy nothing! The only one who should make money on that click is ME. Not the IBO using the false advertising!

At least the IBO with the ad that says “Amway products for sale” and a link to their portal page is more honest. People can look at that ad and decide they don’t need Amway products today and not click on the link.

Holy shit! Did I just use the words “honest” and “IBO” in the same sentence???!!! That combination is pretty much a physical impossibility. If that IBO keeps up that kind of honesty they’ll be out of business very soon!

But back to the ad flogging dreams for sale. Maybe I’m being too judgemental. Dreams can be subjective. One person’s dream is another person’s hunk of junk. The ad offering dreams genuinely thinks that Amway products are dreams. Dreamy like Frankie Avalon in the beach blanket movies.

I disagree.

I’d rather title that person’s ad “nightmares for sale”.

Hiring IBO’s a bad idea?

I’ve been to enough Amway meetings where the Platinum or Diamond speaker shows contempt to anyone who has a job.

They sneer at people who have jobs. They put down people who have jobs. They criticize people who have jobs. They demand to know why IBO’s are working for other people.

The brainwashing just goes on and on and on.

Soon the IBO’s duplicate their upline and sneer at people who have jobs and show contempt for people who work for someone else. These same IBO’s hold down jobs themselves. When we were in Amway no one in our line other than ourselves were self-employed and very few crossline were self-employed.

Most IBO’s are employed by others and armed with the hateful things they have to say about people with J.O.B.s it doesn’t take long for their shitty attitude to infiltrate the workplace. They criticize their co-workers and probably their boss because they’re all fucking morons for having a J.O.B. and working for someone else instead of themselves. They probably start complaining about how much they hate their job and they can’t wait until they’re finally free, thanks to Amway. Better keep your mouths shut or that day might come sooner than you think! And you won’t be financially free when it does!

Employees that complain about how much they hate their job usually don’t last too long in the workplace. They either quit or they’re fired. No workplace needs that kind of negativity bringing the moral down or irritating the other employees who have to listen to the Amway drunken IBO spout off their brainwashed bullshit.

I was amazed at the number of IBO’s in our line or crossline who became unemployed in a period of several months. I could certainly understand why their employers didn’t want to keep them around because they all had this brainwashed “J.O.B.’s Suck” attitude. I never saw any of them find another J.O.B. while we were still in Amway and most of them resorted to taking odd jobs wherever they could find them.

Being the nice guy that he is my Ambot tried to help a few of them out whenever he heard of someone who needed casual labor help doing maintenance around the house.

I talked about our friend who’s a painter in a previous post who occasionally hires helpers for large jobs. Ambot managed to get an unemployed IBO on as his helper. It wasn’t a particularly large job either. About a 1600 square foot house, 2 stories, 3 bedrooms but it needed painting inside and out. Shouldn’t take 2 men too long especially since it was empty and being repainted prior to the new owners moving in. Getting the inside painted first was obviously the priority.

Our painter friend will never hire that IBO again because he was slower than shit. He did a good job but according to our friend, the IBO was S..L..O..W..... For $15/hour I could see why he wanted to drag the job on as long as he could especially since he had no other work lined up. In addition to being a too slow painter, the IBO further annoyed our friend by spending huge amounts of time on his cell phone, calls and texts. If that wasn’t bad enough he brought a boom box and blasted out the latest Amway CD from his tools order.

Yeah I wouldn’t hire that bastard again either!

Ambot actually found another day job for him. Some friends of ours decided to turn their shed in the back yard into a clubhouse for their teenage son. The interior, about 10’ x 15’, needed to be sanded down in preparation for painting. There was some tool they were able to rent for sanding but neither of them wanted to sand so Ambot recommended the bastard but cautioned he was really S..L..O..W..... They didn’t care as long as he was conscientious and did a good job. Ambot suggests rather than paying him by the hour that they pay the bastard $150 for the job whether it takes him 5 hours or 10 hours. So they all agree on that. For some reason we ended up getting involved in picking up the sander from the rental place. I guess our friends couldn’t get there before going to work. I picked up the tool and brought it over to their shed. Ambot phoned slow-as-shit to tell him to get it back to the tool rental place before they closed at 5pm. The bastard arrived around 9 or 10am and started work. At 2:30 he phoned Ambot to say he was nearly done and ready to start cleaning up. I’m not sure how long it takes to sweep up or vacuum the sawdust but I’m sure my friends or their son could have done it when they got home probably take them no more than 10 minutes. Around 5:10 the bastard phones Ambot to double check the address of the tool rental place. Ambot is pissed! What part of “they’re closed at 5pm” did he have trouble understanding? The bastard decides to drive over there anyway and see if someone is still at work. No luck. He eventually brings the sander back to our house. The rental place opens at 7am and if we can get it back by 7:30 our friends won’t be charged an extra day. So now I’m inconvenienced because I have to haul my ass out of bed early the next morning to return the damned sander.

We never recommended that bastard for any other odd jobs. I mean instead of getting the tool back to the shop - about 10 minute drive away - he stayed inside the shed fucking around on his phone for 2 hours!

Our friends needed more help with their shed renos into teen clubhouse. They wanted to get a phone line and cablevision line out there so they could put in a TV and phone. Another friend of theirs was going to wire it from their house to the shed and said they should dig a trench so he could feed the wires through plastic pipes and bury it. They needed a trench dug and I’m not sure why they didn’t get their teenager and some of his friends to dig it but they didn’t. Ambot knows another out of work IBO a young fellow who looks pretty strong. He’s offered $100 to dig a trench about a foot deep and 25 feet from the house to the shed. Shouldn’t take more than a couple of hours because its really nice soft soil, easy digging. It takes him 4 hours because of all the time he spends on his cell phone. But he got the job done.

I would never hire an IBO for any job for the reasons I’ve already listed. They’re negative toward work, they waste too much time on the phone, they want to crank the volume on Amway CD’s, and they have a bad attitude. You pay somebody to get a job done you want them to do the work and not fuck around with texting, phone calls, recruiting prospects, selling Amway shit, blasting Amway motivational CD’s, and otherwise being annoying.

Yes I discriminate! Lazy ass Amway IBO’s need not apply!

Anything for a Buck!

Remember the show Newhart that was on in the 80’s? Larry and his brother Daryl and his other brother Daryl ran a restaurant and a sideline business called "anything for a buck".

Sometimes I think Ambot and I are running a similar side business doing whatever for a buck. One of the joys of being self employed and semi retired is hat we can leave the shop in the hands of our employees and we can kind of take on impromptu opportunities. Ambot doesn’t like to lose out on a money making opportunity, therefore explains the descent into Amway hell.
 

Ambot came home last night after visiting a friend of ours who is a house painter and occasionally he gets large jobs and needs to hire a helper. He’s got the interior of an 8000 square foot house to paint and needs help. So Ambot volunteers that I’ll come work for him. Hunh??? Now how did that happen? Especially since every time we paint a room Ambot bitches at me for doing a shitty job and then he ends up taking over. I don’t think I do all that bad a job painting but I’m not looking to hire myself out as a painter. Oh, I guess I didn’t. Thanks Ambot.

So it takes overnight for the shock of me working for someone else to wear in and this morning I ask Ambot how much money I’m going to get paid for painting. He said that’s still to be discussed.....

Ambot doesn’t like to miss an opportunity to earn some money so he’s kind of like Larry and Darryl and Darryl. I think that’s what drew him into this whole Amway mess. Making an extra $1000/month by only working 10 to 15 hours a week is very appealing. Even more appealing when the upline Platinum and Diamond speakers up the ante and say you can earn $80K/year, $100K/year and up and up and up it goes!

So there you have it. Proof that there are better ways than Amway to make money without hardly trying.

"Anything for a buck" and we don't have to rip people off!

Amway is Creepy!

I get a few Google searches ending up on my blog for “Amway is creepy”. The last search being done by someone in Sweden?! Hmmm.....

Seeing as how my blog is about #10 on the creepy search I thought I’d try to bump it up a bit. So bad news for anyone tuning in today to listen to me curse out my former upline or hear about Ambot's adventures!

So is Amway creepy?

My upline is creepy and Amway IBO’s are creepy.

I don’t know anyone who works at the head office in Ada, Michigan nor any of the other regional offices around the states or in any other countries. My experience with Amway has to do with a couple of phone calls and speaking to an employee on the help (?) desk. A better name would be “unhelpful desk”. Or the “I don’t give a shit desk”.

What goes on inside the four walls of Amway? I can’t imagine its a whole lot more different than other companies. Inside the company moral may or may not be good, it might vary with different departments. Some managers may be nicer than others. Most companies have an executive team that figures out marketing strategies to increase sales and new product development. There are department managers, mid-level managers, supervisors, and a bunch of other employees scattered throughout the company. Nothing creepy about that. Many mid to large size companies have this kind of structure.

Like any other company Amway probably offers its employees certain perks in attempts to retain them: health package, pension plan, flex hours, gym club membership, etc. I wonder if Amway employees are given discounts if they purchase the overpriced products. I wonder if they’re given complimentary IBO registration. Even with employee retention practices in place Amway probably has the same kind of employee turnover as other companies, about 5% each month due to employees quitting, transferring, dying, or on various leaves.   

What about Amway employees? Are they creepy? I’m sure there are creepy brown nosed Amway employees. Every company harbors a few.

I read an article a few months ago that breaks down how employees fit into the corporate structure. About 20% of employees love their jobs and go out of their way to excel. About 60% of employees are average and get their work done and for the most part do a good job. The other 20% hate their jobs and don't do a good job.

So who are the dangerous employees? The 20% who hate their job? Nope. One way or the other they don’t last long and then they’re no longer a problem for the company. The dangerous employees are the 60% average. They’ll get their job done but they won’t bust their ass doing so. They don’t really care one way or the other about the company. Its just a job. Its just a paycheck. If they find another job that pays better or has better benefits they’ll quit in a second. Amway is probably like every other corporation out there and only 20% of their employees like their job. That explains why when IBO’s try to get assistance from corporate chances are high they’ll be dealing with one of the other 80% and end up on the receiving end of disinterest, disdain, contempt, etc because they’re dealing with employees who either hate their job or don’t give a shit and don’t want to be bothered.

There are a lot of names to describe Amway - unethical, creepy, uncaring, bad reputation, pyramid scheme, overpriced, etc. Amway gets labelled with these adjectives because of their own don’t-give-a-shit employees and the actions of IBO’s.

The Internet has had a lot to do with getting the word out about Amway and IBO’s. I doubt Amway can recover and fix their image.

Certainly not as long as people are searching the Internet looking for information on “Amway is creepy”.

Get Rich Quick in Amway?

At Amway meetings I attended the speaker was very careful not to use the words “get rich quick”. Those particular words make most people wary. The old saying about how if it sounds too good to be true comes to mind.

The Platinum or Diamond speaker avoids saying the actual words “get rich quick” but everything else they say implies that a person will get rich in Amway fairly quickly.

Take a popular phrase at Amway meetings “two to five years”. What can happen in two to five years? Why - you can go Diamond of course! The Diamonds show all these videos at Amway functions with mansions, sports cars, private jets, and exotic vacations. The message is that in two to five years that’s the lifestyle all the IBO’s in the audience will be living. Anyone remember that TV show called “Lifestyles of the Rich and Famous”? That’s the perception we’re getting with the Diamond’s videos. That type of lifestyle. The people that Robin Leach was interviewing were earning millions of dollars a year to sustain that lifestyle. The same lifestyle that Amway Diamonds show that they’re living even though Amway literature says average Diamond income is about $150K/year. Here the skeptic in me comes out. Its a lot cheaper to rent a house, cars, airplane, etc for a few days for a movie shoot than to actually own the stuff. I have no way of verifying one way or the other that the things the Diamonds are jumping all over in their videos are actually owned and fully paid for by them or staged for the video.

Is two to five years a long time? Or is that a reasonably quick time to be earning millions of dollars a year?

OK I’m going to pick on Nicolas Cage here. And not in a mean way. Only because he’s been in the news. I like him as an actor. I’ve seen a lot of his movies. “Gone in Sixty Seconds” he made $20 million dollars. The “National Treasure” movies he made $20 million each. Here’s a guy who works lets say maybe a year on a movie and he earns millions of dollars. That sounds pretty “get rich quick” to me. On the other hand this man has lost 2 homes - probably mansions - in New Orleans to foreclosure and his Las Vegas home to foreclosure. He’s having all kinds of money problems. He can’t even sustain an Amway Diamond lifestyle and he earns millions of dollars a year more than those Diamonds. I think Nicolas Cage better make another National Treasure sequel before he gets prospected by some Amway IBO!

Our Platinum says if you are CORE then in 6 months you’ll be earning $80,000/year. Although that might not be “rich”, 6 months is still a reasonably “quick” time to make $80k. Our Platinum also said if you get 20 friends to buy $25/ month from Amway you’d be earning $1000/month. Hunh? Let’s do the math. Amway is earning $500 from those 20 friends spending $25 each. How the hell can the IBO earn $1000/month from that??? That sounds pretty good to me too. Earning double what Amway takes in. Our Platinum claims he works 8 hours a week and earns $100K a year. To a person working a cash register for minimum wage 40 hours a week, I would say working 8 hours a week to earn $100 thousand a year sounds like “get rich quick”.

I realize its all about perception. Some people out there will think $80 or $100 thousand a year is dog chow while someone else will think they’ve hit pay dirt.

Perception. Illusions. Its all part of the Amway scheme.