Dear Santa. An Amway Ambot Letter To Santa

 

The Amway way to financial success is to self consume and "buy from your own store".

Ambots are ALWAYS on the naughty list!

 

Ambots Roasting On An Open Fire

Thanks to one of our talented readers who came up with this little gem! I love it! Very funny and true to life.

(Sing to the tune of "Chestnuts Roasting on an Open Fire...")

Diamonds croaking like a bunch of toads,
Platinums licking up-line boots --
Stupid songs being sung by the Goads
And Ambots desperate for recruits...

Everybody knows, some assholes up in Michigan
Cooked up this scam in '59 --
Half-assed dopes really think that they can
Make 6-4-2 in record time.

They think that PV's on the way
If you can get your relatives to pay ---
And every IBO is gonna try
To see if he can think up a new lie.

So I'm offering this simple phrase
To those who think this scam is true:
Though it's been said, many times, many ways,
Amway bullshit screws you.

 

Don’t Be A Dumb Ass Amway Ambot Christmas Tree Pusher

Thanks to one of our readers who shared his story of busting his ass to sell those shitty Amway Christmas trees. And the smart decision to get the hell out of the Amway pyramid scheme.

When I was in AW, I developed 200 fliers to sell Christmas Trees from AW. I drove around distributing them into mailboxes. And out of all that work, I received 1 order.

Well, the tree was shipped directly to the buyer, and guess what, it was bent.

Yes. The bottom of the trunk was straight and then it quickly bent to one side. What a lot, and complete, embarrassment.

The buyer was pissed, pissed, pissed. I quickly apologized, and refunded his money personally. I was not going to have the poor guy ship a tree back to the company for a refund as they suggested - I mean, just how stupid is that. And that was about par for the course with almost every experience I had with AW. One stupid thing after another.

I soon realized AW was a poor business decision, and continued to work my JOB and enjoy my family, and not spend time on AW any more. I now have millions in a 401K IRA, and plenty of time for family and true friends and true service to the community - something very few, if any, AW distributors will EVER have.

 

Don’t Be A Dumb Ass. Don’t Buy An Amway Christmas Tree!

Some ambot showed up here searching for how to buy a Christmas tree from Amway.

My first thought is why the hell would you want to do that?

Then I got to wondering are these artificial trees or real trees?

Either way if Amway is selling them they have got to cost a bundle!

Then I got to thinking what a great idea to screw up somebody’s search criteria by ending up at this blog yet again! Oh Christmas Tree, oh Amway Christmas Tree, how shitty to have you in my house!

Probably IBOFB or some other fucking Amway loser will show up to say that Amway has partnered with some farmer in Vermont to buy Christmas trees of his farm for $500 each. Plus shipping! Just like that motherfucker told us about that market Amway is affiliated with where we can buy 3 pounds of potatoes for $12.95 plus the cost of shipping to our house. Now there’s a shitty deal! Bought 10lbs of potatoes for $2 the other day from a nearby retailer not out to fuck over their customers.

No matter who is selling Christmas trees they’re going to be a real joy to ship and probably cost a few bucks. Cheaper to buy locally.

If its an artificial Christmas tree there is plenty of mail order competition for that one. I’ve seen artificial trees for sale on eBay, JC Penny, Walmart, etc. You buy them and they’re shipped to your house.

So I did a Google search for buying a live Christmas tree to have shipped to your house and was surprised to find such beasts do exist! They cost more than going to your Christmas tree lot but not all that much more. I couldn’t find how much to ship the suckers though. I wouldn’t want to be the guy having to sweep out his UPS truck after delivering one. Pine needles everywhere!

There are enough nurseries and organizations selling live Christmas trees where you can go and pick out one that you like rather than waiting for the UPS to deliver an overpriced Christmas tree that shows up with smushed branches and missing foliage and an unfortunate decomposing odor.
The entire notion of buying a Christmas tree from Amway, sight unseen, for an exorbitant price, is laughable. But then again, if persons in Amway are stupid enough to buy overpriced Nutrilite vitamins and crummy cosmetics, they're probably dumb enough to buy a Christmas tree from the company.

Just say hell no to Amway Christmas trees! No overpriced Amway Christmas trees allowed in the house! No shitty overpriced Amway products allowed under our tree!

Who Will You Meet At Barnes & Noble? Hopefully Not Amway Losers!

Who’s seen the Christmas commercial for Barnes & Noble? The one with Tony Bennett (RIP) and Lady Gaga singing a duet and ending with “you never know who you’ll meet at Barnes & Noble”. Is it even running again this year? I haven’t seen it yet but that doesn’t mean its not running somewhere. 

And what’s with banning the fucking song on all these radio stations? I’ve heard rappers lyrics that are more suggestive and offensive.

 

Anyway. Enter Amway creepy factor. 

Who else is watching this commercial and right away thinking of the horrors of it all and getting pestered by Amway Ambots at Barnes & Noble?

There’s been lots of comments left on this blog by people who were shopping at Barnes & Noble and got sniped by some Amway asshole trying to prospect them.

Its a big NO for IBO’s to harrass customers shopping at Barnes & Noble.
The memo to Amway’s cult leaders from head office used to be on the Amquix info website but it appears to have closed down. So sad. It was a great information source about Scamway.

The problem is information control from Amway’s upline cult leaders. Memos are not sent out to individual IBO’s but rather to the Amway cult leaders. It is their responsibility to notify their downline but not everyone gets notified.

Especially IBO’s who signed up after this memo was sent out from head office. Undoubtedly complaints were coming in Barnes & Noble management for years. In its typical tradition of Amway employees working at head office not giving a shit what Amway IBO’s are doing likely nothing was done for the longest time and probably nothing is done today either no matter how much that letter threatens IBO discipline. I’m not sure what threats it took from Barnes & Noble to the big shots at Scamway before the letter was sent out to the Amway cult leaders to deal with the annoying ambots.

People don’t like to be harrassed when they’re shopping. Even more so if they’re flipping through a book and reading passages trying to make a decision on whether or not to buy. They don’t need some fucking Amway ambot sniping them and saying hey I’m a business owner and I sell books too. Yup B&N will want the throw that fucker out of their store for trying to take their business away from them. Competition!

Bottom line is Amway’s head office doesn’t give a flying fuck what the IBOs are doing. I’ve complained about lies I heard from our upline and head office bastards response is to claim they are not responsible for anything said at Amway meetings and if we have a problem to take it up with the upline who lied to us.

So really what happens if a manager from Barnes & Noble calls Amway’s I-don’t-give-a-fuck customer service desk to complain about ambots sniping customers shopping in their stores. The response they’ll get is - find someone who gives a shit and tell them! Its not like anything will happen to the ambot. What are they going to say? You’re fired. And Amway’s just lost another income stream. Ha ha. Not likely.

You never know who you’ll meet at Barnes & Noble but just hope to hell it isn’t an Amway asshole.

So if you’re an Amway asshole - stay out of Barnes & Noble!

If you are an Amway asshole and you see me in Barnes & Noble - don't fuck with me!