Amway Is An Expensive Social Club

Joecool wrote something on his blog to the effect that if you aren’t earning money in your Amway business but are spending lots of money on Amway purchases and tools then its almost like you’ve joined an expensive social club.

I think that statement may apply to Ambot. The more money he spent on Amway products and tools, the more his new friends liked him.

People are busy spending time with friends and family. They’ve busy at their jobs or business owners may end up with some odd hours to accommodate clients. People with school age children are involved in their kids recreational activities or driving them to their activities. Add in grocery shopping, spending time at the gym, walking the dog, and other recreational pursuits. How about quiet time at home reading a book, on the computer, or watching TV. What about the not so fun stuff around the house like cleaning, laundry, mowing the lawn, and keeping the garden weeded. Most people have things to do that fill their days. We lead busy lives just like countless others.

If we weren’t already busy enough after Ambot wanted to do the Amway thing again we were constantly on the go, go, go. Often there would be 2 or 3 board plans in a week that we had to attend even though the same old bullshit we’d heard the night before we listened to again. This would tie us up from 7pm to midnight. Nothing like boring us to death so we’re ready to sleep. Not to mention any other seminars or rallies or other events the upline decided we should attend.

I remember being at a function and listening to a Diamond speaker who was showing the audience “lines” to use to pick up prospects. Say a prospect came up with the objection that “the business” wouldn’t work for them because they don’t have any friends. The Diamond says, then ask them: “How would you like to have some friends?”

The expensive social club reference triggered that memory.

Someone who doesn’t have friends may be interested in joining some sort of social group to meet people. But the purpose of being an Amway IBO is to find other prospects to join up and become IBO's too or to find customers to buy Amway products. So if the only friends you have are people already involved in Amway, there is no chance of getting any of them to sign up to be an IBO or to buy Amway products.

So even though we already lead busy lives Ambot decided we should be even busier. He had a whole new group of friends who were slyly influencing him to leave behind his old friends. He was full of self-importance whenever someone asked him to come over and he’d answer he was busy that night (Amway meeting). Not to mention the overload of text messages and phone calls that he immediately had to deal with from the fucking assholes in his upline.

I’m not here to suggest social clubs or how to meet new friends. All I want to say is if you are looking for a new group of people to hang out with there are many avenues to try. If one of your reasons to join Amway is to have a ready made group of friends that’s a bad decision. Amway is an expensive social club that will cause you financial and emotional distress. When you quit Amway that's the last you'll ever hear of these new friends fickle bastards that they are. These aren’t the kind of friends you need. This isn't the business venture you need.

And one more time from marriedtoanambot let’s just send another big old FUCK YOU out to Amway Scamway and their scammer army of Ambots.

 

 

Amway Cult Leaders Demand To See Your Budget

I was surprised when Ambot announced that the sack of shit Platinum wanted to see our budget.

“That’s really none of his fucking business,” I responded. “Its not like he works for a bank and we’re going for a loan.”

“But if we’re serious business builders then he says we have to show him a budget,” Ambot argued. Yep that was total Amway speak and for the life of me I couldn’t figure out why the hell the Platinum wanted to see our budget other than Ambot’s loose explanation that the Platinum wanted to help us create a budget that we could follow and help us get financially on track. Let’s see - is he a financial planner? I was pretty sure he has a government job that’s not finance related? But then I forget that not minding their own business is a prerequisite for being a sack of shit Amway Platinum.

I had created a budget sometime during the past couple of years after reading a book written by a financial advisor and one of the exercises was to create a budget. Then I started reading books by another financial advisor who didn’t recommend creating budgets because over 90% of people don’t follow them anyway which is totally true in our case. The budget I had saved on the computer was good enough for me without updating any changes and I printed it out for Ambot.

The Platinum was impressed and said we were in much better shape than most of his downline. Well no shit there’s a reason for that particularly because other than mortgage and business costs we had no debt. We owned our cars and had investments and savings. This is just part of life experience. People in their 20’s who are starting out still have to save up a down payment to buy their first house and they probably took out a loan to buy a car. And probably have credit card debt.

So the fucker wants to see our budget to guide us financially on track when we’re in better financial shape than him?

In hindsight I know the Platinum wanted to see our budget to see how much wiggle room we had to buy Amway products and invest in tools when he saw the difference between our income and expenses. The real reason he was impressed was that we had no debt on our credit cards with about 100K available. That’s a lot of Amway products we can charge not to mention we had nothing holding us back from attending out of state functions. “Just charge it!” We have equity in our house so again the Platinum must have seen $$$ signs that we could get a line of credit against that equity if we needed. Oh and he must have loved decent 401k available that we could cash in to donate to the Amway cult.

While coming up with this post I looked at the revised budget I did after the Platinum meeting so he must have given me some Amway stuff to add in. Under PV there is $300 budgeted each month. (If you read previous posts you’ll know that Ambot purchased closer to $1000 each month for PV. What did I say about not following a budget????) This is under household where I have things like groceries, utilities, etc. Under (Amway) “business” expenses are 3 items (HA!): web page $50 (that would have actually been the WWDB Premier membership), Communikate $34, and samples $60, totalling $144/month in business expenses. Plus $300 personal shopping for PV = $444. That’s approximately what I said in the SaveFirst, Spend Later blog on a lowball monthly Amway investment. Add in functions and budget $700/month minimum. A little more than what the sack of shit had us put on the budget.

The budget was never referred to ever again. Kind of like the name list. Just produce one to show the Platinum that you have one and no need to bring it up again.

But did the Platinum give us any concrete advice on how much money to put into the Amway budget. During the first few months when he was “fired up” Ambot threw away close to $2000/month on various things having to do with Amway - buying products, buying tools, entertaining fucking assholes in the Amway upline, etc. After he hit the limit on that credit card the spending was reduced to around $500/month.

So much for the budget. If I was actually keeping one I’d have to add in a new column for paying back credit card debt thanks to Amway.

 

 

What Happens When You Don’t Pay Amway?

We have a lot of fun with search criteria that people use to show up at the marriedtoanambot blog.

One of the searchers wants to know “what happens when you don’t pay Amway”

First off not paying Amway is a very good thing because that means you aren’t getting scammed out of your money buying substandard products for a premium price.

Amway is only your friend as long as you shop in their store.

No shop. No friends no more!

I would say the answer is as simple as any online retailer you shop from. Don’t pay them and they won’t send you the goods you put in your shopping cart.

Also the same as the annual membership fee Amway charges you for the “privilege” gag gag of shopping in their store. Don’t pay your annual fee you don’t get to shop there. And some fat cat at Amway has a little less money in their bank account.

Costco is the same way. Don’t pay your annual membership fee and the bouncer standing at the door at Costco won’t let you in.

I would say its a very good thing when you don’t pay Amway. That means you quit doing business with them and you’re not getting ripped off anymore.

I encourage everyone not to pay Amway!

 

 

Amway Quacks

When an IBO signs up to be a commissioned sales rep with Amway that also means they now become a professional expert on everything.

Yes everything. Fuck those college degrees. You can become an expert by paying a couple of hundred a year to become a card carrying Amway asshole. That’s only the membership fee. Doesn’t include the thousands of dollars you have to spend to keep the Amway upline happy.

What’s really scary are Amway ambots dispensing medical advice. Their “patients” suffer from various illnesses and because the ambot is in Amway that means they are now a medical professional and can treat and cure these diseases.

Its really scary the comments that have been left here and questions asked. Amway ambots are telling people with terminal illnesses that Amway products will cure what ails them and patients are searching the Internet to check out the claims made by these Amway quacks.

25 years ago Ambot and I took one of those weekend first aid courses so that meant we were the most medically trained professionals in our line of sponsorship. That plus the fact we’ve watched on TV just about every medical drama out there. Every ambot in our group would phone for medical advice. For christsake! – see a real doctor. And sometimes they did but they would still come to us for a second opinion because we were better qualified than highly trained doctors because we were in Amway.

My long ago first aid training consists of learning to do the Heimlich maneuver, CPR, and put on bandages. Don’t come to me for medical advice. If you got a splinter in your finger I can probably help you. If you’re dying of cancer I’m not going to suggest you take Amway snake oil for your miracle cure. But that’s because I’ve got morals and I’m no liar and I’m not trying to fuck a buck out of you by scamming you. An Amway quack standing at the gateway to hell will lie just to get your money for the phony medical advice they give.

Amway ambots have no morals. They’re only out to make a buck so these Amway quacks have no problem dispensing bad medical advice while pretending they have a medical degree from Amway university.

Amway ambots are quick to insult doctors who actually went to medical school and got degrees. What a waste of money when its so much cheaper to become an Amway quack.

Amway quacks also use some bullshit line about would you ask your friend for advice on surgery instead of a real surgeon. Ambots don’t even see surgeons and instead they do ask their Amway quack friends for surgery and medical advice. Ambots seek medical advice from Amway quacks instead of qualified doctors who graduated from medical school with a degree.

Amway ambots are know it alls. Today they might be an Amway quack dispensing medical advice and tomorrow they might be an ambulance chaser giving legal advice.

“Paging Dr. Quack. Paging Dr. Quack. Amway is calling.”

 

What Exactly Is Amway

One of our talented readers came up with a poem that perfectly describes Amway. It deserves its own post. Thank you for your contribution!

Who else wants to see the Goads put this to music and sing it at the next Amway WWDB brainwashing conference?

 

WHAT EXACTLY IS AMWAY?

Amway seeks out brainless dopes
And fills them with imagined hopes.
They only sign up stupid folk,
‘Cause Amway is a fucking joke.

Look at helpless IBOs
Paying money through the nose--
These losers are all going broke
‘Cause Amway is a fucking joke.

Amway works you like a slave
And sends you to an early grave.
You’ll sweat, you’ll starve, you’ll cough and choke,
‘Cause Amway is a fucking joke.

You’ll slowly rack up massive debt
For purchases you’ll soon regret.
The tension will give you a stroke,
“Cause Amway is a fucking joke.

Go to functions, hear the crap
Spouting from some Diamond’s yap--
Those big-pin scum are blowing smoke,
“Cause Amway is a fucking joke,

You even have to take a class
On how to kiss your Platinum’s ass.
You’re shackled to your up-line’s yoke,
“Cause Amway is a fucking joke.

You’re hoping for a bonus check?
You think you’ll make a fortune? Heck--
Before you earn a dime, you’ll croak,
‘Cause Amway is a fucking joke.

What is left, when unpaid bills
Pile up in big paper hills?
Smoke some weed, or high-grade coke,
‘Cause Amway is a fucking joke.

 

 

Helpful Tip: Do Not Buy XS Energy Drink Gear

Ambot was so hyped with everything Amway that he went to the XS Gear website undoubtedly encouraged by his upline and purchased some items. Ambot never drank energy drinks prior to getting involved in Amway but during the Amway dark ages he purchased boxes of XS energy drinks weekly and consumed them with frighteningly urgency. It was only natural he would want to promote the product that his upline convinced him was going to pave his path to riches.

He purchased what could best be described as a nylon webbed cycling outfit - shirt and shorts. He also purchased an XS cooler to store all his XS energy drinks and carry them dutifully to all Amway meetings.

The problem with the shirt and shorts was that they arrived in a smaller size than Ambot ordered and they charged his credit card so they had his money. Thus began many phone calls back and forth between Ambot and XS Gear. After dicking Ambot around for several weeks XS Gear finally admits they don’t have his size and won’t be getting any more because its a discontinued product. After all IBO’s are so busy attending meetings and functions, dealing with multiple phone calls and texts from upline, showing the plan, and all the other time-consuming bullshit that goes on inside “the business” who’s got time to ride a bike.

Ambot tried to return the clothes but XS Gear refused to take them back. Remember they strung him along with telephone tag for a long time and checking the stockroom for other sizes? They have a refund policy only if the items are returned within 30 days. The time frame had expired.

Let’s see. Whose fault was it for charging the credit card and then shipping the wrong size?

Their suggestion to Ambot? “Keep taking the product and one day you’ll fit into the clothes.”

What a bunch of fucking idiots especially since they sent the wrong size in the first place instead of coming clean from the start and admitting to Ambot they were unable to fill the order. No wonder Amway partners with them. Always good to have a partner store on hand that shares similar philosophies in fucking over IBO’s.

I’m not sure what happened to those clothes. I haven’t seen them. Its possible Ambot chucked them out or put them in with other clothes we donate to charity. Maybe they’re stuck in the back of the closet and I’ll run into them again one day. He never wore them.

As for the XS cooler? We didn’t really need another cooler. We have 2 or 3 already. Ambot probably only bought it for bragging rights to impress his upline and crossline about how devoted he is. Ambot loaned it to one of the fucking assholes in his Amway upline and they stole it. Never to grace our house again thank God!

That’s one of the best things about ending our Amway business - no longer dealing with lowlife lying, greed-consumed Amway IBO thieves.

 

 

I Wake Up Even When I’m Not Done Sleeping

Last night was one of those nights when I kept waking up. I couldn’t stay asleep. I finally woke up just after 6am an ungodly hour of the day for me. I’ll probably go outside and lie down on the lounge chair with a book and end up falling asleep in the sun and then I’ll really be groggy for the rest of the day!

At the many Amway meetings I attended the cult leader speaking to the group would say something to the effect of “wouldn’t it be great to wake up in the morning when you’re done sleeping”. I know I heard our sack of shit Platinum said that at every Scamway meeting that his wife gets up once she’s done sleeping. Sounds a little irresponsible when you have school age children. Their kids were teenagers - a boy and a girl - I think about 13 and 14 at the time. Does mom not want to make sure the kids are getting themselves out of bed on time, eating a decent breakfast, packing a lunch, and making sure they get out the door? Would Platinum dad be doing all this? Unlikely. That asshole is a male chauvinist pig and childcare he would put under the category of “woman’s work”. In which case his wife is very likely getting out of bed when the sack of shit shakes her awake and says “you’re done sleeping. Get up now! I want my fucking breakfast!”

The main reason the Platinum says his wife gets out of bed when she’s done sleeping is to sneer at the downline who have jobs and set their alarm clock daily and get out of bed in time to get to work.

“Wake up when you’re done sleeping” is something I have a hard time getting my head wrapped around. First off most parents who have school age children don’t laze around in bed and get up when they’re “done sleeping”. Maybe - and that’s a big maybe depending on how mature and responsible the kid is - once the kid is a junior or senior and is capable of getting themselves out of bed on time, dressed, eat breakfast and off to school. I know I was just as likely to play hooky as go to school. Just because your kid goes out the door doesn’t mean they don’t have better things to do for the day than go to school. Parents who have younger children need to get them out of bed, dressed, prepare breakfast, fix a lunch bag, and walk them to school unless there are older siblings who can walk with the younger child. Its my guess that most stay at home parents wake up by at least 7am. They probably don’t go back to bed once everyone is out the door either.

Unless of course you’re a lazy ass IBO who is following the upline’s advice about not getting out of bed until you’re done sleeping.

Unlike what the Amway assholes say about wouldn’t it be nice not to have to wake up to an alarm clock every morning I very rarely set my alarm clock. If I set my alarm its because I have somewhere to be early. Alarm clock or not I’d say that I very rarely wake up when I’m “done sleeping”. Like today for example! I ain’t done sleeping yet! So I’m working on a blog post!

Just because Platinums and Diamonds praise the value of staying in bed until you’re “done sleeping” doesn’t mean its something everyone aspires to do and not something that is necessarily practical. I guess none of them ever heard of Benjamin Franklin and “early to bed early to rise makes a man healthy, wealthy and wise”.

I wouldn’t say that I necessarily go to bed early though since we’re no longer in Amway I’m able to get to bed before midnight. Does it make me healthy waking up early? When I get up I walk the dog, have something light to eat, and then I go to the Y to swim or do an exercise class. Healthy enough I suppose. Or healthier than lying around in bed until I’m “done sleeping”.

Let’s compare that to an Amway IBO. Say the lazy bastard hauls ass out of bed around noon. They go to the kitchen to prepare a meal of an XS energy drink, food bar, and vitamins. Next will probably be checking email, text messages, and making lots of phone calls. Next thing its late in the afternoon and the laundry and housecleaning aren’t done. What about yard work? When was the last time the lawn was mowed or the garden weeded? Who’s got time for that? Now its time for counselling with downline because they’re starting to get off work now and then the 8pm board plan meeting and the night owl. Arrive back home around 2am and do it all over again the next day.

Lying around in bed is a waste of time to many people. I’ve always gone with the philosophy that the quicker I can get things done the quicker I can relax. Even though I can lay around in bed until noon if I wanted I don’t do it because the day is getting away from me.

Waking up when I’m done sleeping does not work for me.

Neither does waking up when I’m not done sleeping!

But I still press on.

At least I’m not an Amway asshole who lies around in bed half the day because of a feeling of entitlement because that’s what the upline tells them to aspire to - get up when they’re done sleeping.

And those Amway fuckers call us lazy!