Monday, May 23, 2016

Easier Jobs Than Amway - Where You'll Actually Make Money Doing!



At every Amway meeting the cult leaders used to mock the ambots and say Amway is so easy anyone can do it. Though that message is more to the point of “I’m a fucking loser and I can do Amway and if you can’t do Amway then you’re an even bigger fucking loser than I am!”

So I found an article that shows some jobs that I think are a lot easier than being an Amway IBO. Pays way better too! Hell digging ditches is probably an easier job than being in Amway! I’d say any job where you don’t have to put up with a bunch of fucking assholes from Amway is a much easier job. Because that is the hardest part about being in Amway. Putting up with the Amway upline assholes.

Since this article was first published on this blog, the Yahoo article has gone AWOL so no link provided. Oh what the hell here’s the link but don’t bother clicking on it. Yahoo has done some page restructuring. http://shine.yahoo.com/photos/9-easiest-jobs-planet-slideshow/-photo-2295608-224000728.html

  1. Professional sleeper, mattress tester - if you’re practically falling asleep at Amway meetings because the upline assholes are boring you to death, then at least being a mattress tester is something you’ll get for sleeping. Unlike Amway meetings where you have to pay the cult leader to show up and sleep.
  2. Chocolate tester - sure the hell beats being the poor bastard that has to test the Amway food bars. “Phewwy! Yucky! Tastes like shit!”
  3. Cute pet photo picker - sure the hell beats being the poor bastard that has to sift through Amway photos and decide which one they like the best. What! How the hell do I choose from this fucked up mess!
  4. Mansion sitter - kind of a step up from a regular house sitter this person takes care of luxury homes while the owners are away. Hmmm. Maybe Amway Diamonds already do this and use the opportunity for a photo shoot for one of those videos shown at Amway functions to bullshit the Amway cult followers.
  5. TV watcher - and those fucking assholes in our Amway upline used to mock their cult followers and say how much money are you making sitting at home watching TV. Well $10/hour if you’re doing research for Nielson! That’s the same amount of money you’ll make in one month of commission from Amway if you’re CORE and putting in about 100 hours in that month on Amway related shit! Looks like Nielsen’s only qualification is owning a TV set so if you don’t have one you can go out and buy one for $300 coincidentally the same amount of money on a minimum you have to spend each month buying shitty overpriced Amway products.
  6. Professional know it all - well every Amway asshole I met all claimed to know everything! Oh wait maybe I mean the people I knew in Amway were all smart asses! Put together DIY videos for youtube. Hot damn! How come some Amway cult leader hasn’t tapped into this market yet!
  7. Spa critic - I guess this is like a secret shopper for massages! I’d rather get a massage than go to an Amway cult meeting!
  8. Resort consultant - I think this is kind of like a secret shopper thing too. Provide feedback on resorts and the services they offer. Well I’m an Amway upline consultant. I provide feedback on what a bunch of fucking assholes the Amway upline are!
And some of these jobs you can even combine more than one. Chocolate tester by day. Mattress tester by night. Double the income!

Beats the hell out of being in the Amway cult. J.O.B. by day. Amway (phony) "business owner" by night. Use the day job income to tithe the Amway cult leaders and go into debt, lose your house to foreclosure, marriage end in divorce court.

Hmmm. Whichever one should I choose.....



13 comments:

  1. 9. Go to medical school and become a proctologist. Just like being in Amway you will be dealing with a bunch of assholes but the two differences are you will be performing a legitimate worthwhile service for others and be actually making money for doing it.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. LOL Ray. Dealing with Amway Ambots is exactly dealing with a bunch of assholes. LOL!

      Delete
  2. Hahahahaha! Great comment, Ray!

    ReplyDelete
  3. Pan handling is much more lucrative than Amway.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Anonymous - staying at home watching TV is more lucrative than Amway or at least you're not throwing away money at the Amway cult.

      Delete
    2. Here in New York City, if you have a good location, in a plaza or a major thoroughfare, a panhandler can made anywhere from 200 to 300 dollars per day. And it's totally tax-free.

      If several hundred people pass by, and even just a few of them throw some small change into your hat, it can be done.

      Does that beat Amway? It sure as hell does!

      Delete
    3. Is this hate towards Amway only in the US, or is it equally bad regardless which country it is in?

      Because over here in my country, Amway is only like a Walmart with membership requirement.

      You sign up as Amway member (basically free), then go shop in their retail outlets. You grab the things you want, pay for it, then leave the shop.

      Delete
    4. Dear Anonymous of May 25, 2;02 AM --

      Yes, it is much different here in the U.S. There are no Amway retail stores where you can just walk in off the street and buy products. Amway does not allow that.

      Here, you have to sign up and be part of "The Plan." You have to join a cult-like organization that controls your life. You have to spend large sums of money on motivational propaganda and compulsory meetings.

      Amway is much different in foreign countries.

      Delete
    5. Anonymous from the other country- people in Amway are too embarrassed to admit they got involved with that scam. They won't even say the A word unless they want to get laughed at.

      Delete
  4. Yup, any minimum wage job is better than doing scamway. You actually make money and don't have to sell your soul. Heck, just staying home and drinking beer is better than doing scamway--it only costs a few bucks and I don't have to pretend to be interested in beer. I really like it! :-)

    Anonymous Las Vegas

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Anonymous - yup stay home and drink beer and save money that would be tithed to the Great Amway God.

      Delete
  5. I guess the issues lies with the American Amway distributors then.

    Amway in my country works like a referral program (the same circumstances you will refer friends to download Uber apps and earn credits), nothing like those you have mentioned...

    ReplyDelete

Comments are moderated but we publish just about everything. Even brainwashed ambots who show up here to accuse us of not trying hard enough and that we are lazy, quitters, negative, unchristian dreamstealers. Like we haven’t heard that Amspeak abuse from the assholes in our upline!

If your comment didn’t get published it could be one of these reasons:
1. Is it the weekend? We don’t moderate comments on weekends. Maybe not every day during the week either. Patience.
2. Racist/bigoted comments? Take that shit somewhere else.
3. Naming names? Public figures like politicians and actors and people known in Amway are probably OK – the owners, Diamonds with CDs or who speak at functions, people in Amway’s publicity department who write press releases and blogs. Its humiliating for people to admit their association with Amway so respect their privacy if they’re not out there telling everyone about the love of their life.
4. Gossip that serves no purpose. There are other places to dish about what Diamonds are having affairs or guessing why they’re getting divorced. If you absolutely must share that here – don’t name names. I get too many nosy ambots searching for this. Lets not help them find this shit.
5. Posting something creepy anonymously and we can’t track your location because you’re on a mobile device or using hide my ass or some other proxy. I attracted an obsessed fan and one of my blog administrators attracted a cyberstalker. Lets keep it safe for everyone. Anonymous is OK. Creepy anonymous and hiding – go fuck yourselves!
6. Posting something that serves no purpose other than to cause fighting.
7. Posting bullshit Amway propaganda. We might publish that comment to make fun of you. Otherwise take your agenda somewhere else. Not interested.
8. Notice how this blog is written in English? That's our language so keep your comments in English too. If you leave a comment written in another language then we either have to use Google translate to put it into English so everyone can understand what you wrote or we can hit the Delete button. Guess which one is easier for us to do?
9. We suspect you're a troublemaking Amway asshole.
10. Your comment got caught in the spam filter. Gets checked occasionally. We’ll get to you eventually and approve it as long as it really isn’t spam.