Tuesday, September 20, 2016

Are You Qualified To Get A Job At Amway?

This blog gets searches from people in the Grand Rapids area looking for how to get a job at Amway Alticor.

The first thought is what kind of scum sucking low life son of a bitch wants to work for a company that is responsible for destroying lives, causing financial distress, bankruptcies, debt, divorces, etc, etc. Then I remember I was watching the news and there was a segment about people who got laid off from their jobs two years ago, three years ago and some of them are desperate to accept any kind of job. So I shouldn’t judge some poor unfortunate soul who is so desperate to get a job that they’d apply to Scamway. Desperation causes people to lower themselves to accept shitty jobs with shitty companies just to get a paycheck.

Here’s a comment left by an Amway employee. A shining example that shows exactly the type of attitude one must have if they want to work for Amway. This is one of Amway’s top employees. This is the best of the best from Amway’s workforce. This is as high up as they get in Amway, employee of the month every month! This is the type of high quality employee that Amway is looking for and the attitude that all Amway employees must have to work there. This top quality Amway employee is the measure of success that all Amway employees must duplicate.

Lmao yu are very pathetic I'm a customer service represative from Amway and yes honey straight from ADA mi while yu failed in our business theirs others reaching diamond platinum level don't blame others for yur failure I help every single day these ibo' s get to the level their at quite frankly I'm happy yur sorryass is not with amway anymore yu were prolly the people who would call in constantly to report they did not recieve orders, items we will never doubt yu and always process replacements were not dumb we no half of these reports are bs but hey were Amway we can do that shit and honey yu want to talk about high prices quality cost my love if yu can't afford it don't join then yu make me laugh with yur dumb posts I did not know ver brainwash people lmao well while u sit here and stress over Amway we will keep doing our thing if yu ever want to chat give us a call yu have our number if yu don't its public honey make sure yu speak with one of us in ADA mi and I really do hope u yu accept my post time to here it from an actual

If you too want to work at the same place as the above poster, here are the qualifications to get a job at Amway:

  1. Ability to be nasty to others
  2. Good at lying
  3. Poor communication skills
  4. Inability to string a sentence together
  5. Don’t give a shit about helping others
  6. Poor problem solving ability
  7. Argumentative
  8. Not looking for long term employment
  9. Arrogant
  10. Must refer to everyone who is not an Amway employee as a loser
  11. Hate talking to people
  12. Inability to use every punctuation key on the keyboard
  13. Spelling skills not needed
  14. No experience necessary and Amway don’t train
  15. Have a rotten personality
  16. Be discourteous to customers (aka IBO’s)
  17. Hate holding down a job
  18. Unhelpful
  19. Enjoy swearing at customers
  20. Inappropriate time management skills
  21. Inability to complete tasks
  22. Ineffective customer follow up
  23. Clock watchers
  24. Rudeness to callers is an asset
  25. No particular desire to move up in the company
  26. Refuse to do anything that requires immediate attention
  27. Following company procedures optional
  28. Strong superiority complex
  29. Not flexible
  30. Ability to effectively convey to the customer how bored you are with them
  31. No sense of humor
  32. Able to push buttons and cause anger and rage in clients
  33. Ability to make people hate you and hate the company

No happy, helpful personality types who actually love their jobs need apply to Amway!!! Lazy ass condescending bastards are absolutely encouraged to apply to Amway. This is your dream job come true!!!

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Comments are moderated but we publish just about everything. Even brainwashed ambots who show up here to accuse us of not trying hard enough and that we are lazy, quitters, negative, unchristian dreamstealers. Like we haven’t heard that Amspeak abuse from the assholes in our upline!

If your comment didn’t get published it could be one of these reasons:
1. Is it the weekend? We don’t moderate comments on weekends. Maybe not every day during the week either. Patience.
2. Racist/bigoted comments? Take that shit somewhere else.
3. Naming names? Public figures like politicians and actors and people known in Amway are probably OK – the owners, Diamonds with CDs or who speak at functions, people in Amway’s publicity department who write press releases and blogs. Its humiliating for people to admit their association with Amway so respect their privacy if they’re not out there telling everyone about the love of their life.
4. Gossip that serves no purpose. There are other places to dish about what Diamonds are having affairs or guessing why they’re getting divorced. If you absolutely must share that here – don’t name names. I get too many nosy ambots searching for this. Lets not help them find this shit.
5. Posting something creepy anonymously and we can’t track your location because you’re on a mobile device or using hide my ass or some other proxy. I attracted an obsessed fan and one of my blog administrators attracted a cyberstalker. Lets keep it safe for everyone. Anonymous is OK. Creepy anonymous and hiding – go fuck yourselves!
6. Posting something that serves no purpose other than to cause fighting.
7. Posting bullshit Amway propaganda. We might publish that comment to make fun of you. Otherwise take your agenda somewhere else. Not interested.
8. Notice how this blog is written in English? That's our language so keep your comments in English too. If you leave a comment written in another language then we either have to use Google translate to put it into English so everyone can understand what you wrote or we can hit the Delete button. Guess which one is easier for us to do?
9. We suspect you're a troublemaking Amway asshole.
10. Your comment got caught in the spam filter. Gets checked occasionally. We’ll get to you eventually and approve it as long as it really isn’t spam.