Wednesday, September 20, 2017

101 Ways To Piss Off An Amway IBO

This topic is inspired by that TV show called 101 Ways to Leave a Game Show. Its hilarious! I’d like to do most of those stunts to our former upline minus the safety equipment of course!

This post might help out the people who end up at my blog after doing a Google search for “how to get rid of those annoying Amway salespeople” or “how to tell Amway people to go away”.

Here are 101 things to say to an IBO to piss him off:

  1. Does this have anything to do with Amway?
  2. Amway is a pyramid scheme.
  3. XS Energy Drinks taste like cat piss!
  4. Why did Ganesh and Neha Shenoy get divorced?
  5. Why is everyone in Amway so phony nice to me?
  6. $60 a year membership to buy overpriced products? Are you fucking kidding me?
  7. Go to hell! Oh I forgot. You’re in Amway. Same thing.
  8. Go peddle your snake oil somewhere else!
  9. Why are Nutrilite vitamins so expensive? And don’t give me no bullshit about the high quality because that’s a lie.
  10. I read on the Internet that IBO’s lie about Artistry Cosmetics being one of the top 5 cosmetics in the world.
  11. Are you really dumb enough to believe that everything to do with Amway is a tax deduction?
  12. Does Amway sell Monavie products?
  13. Is this Scamway?
  14. You want me to come to an 8pm meeting? Fuck off! American Idol  is on then!
  15. Hey I drank your Perfect Water and I still don’t look 10 years younger! You’re a fucking liar!
  16. Why are the Puryears selling their river house?
  17. What kind of a slimeball gets involved with Amway?
  18. Did you hear Amway’s getting sued again?
  19. How many people do you have in your downline?
  20. I heard you lose a lot of money in Amway.
  21. Have you read Merchants of Deception?
  22. Amway is a cult.
  23. How come when a dog eats Amway dog food it shits three times more than it used to?
  24. I can make $115 a month working an Amway business for 10 to 15 hours a week? Do the math asshole! That’s $2 to $3 an hour!
  25. Show me your tax return to prove you’re making $100,000 a year in Amway.
  26. Who’s the liar that told you Amway owns the Amway Arena in Orlando?
  27. If you’re so successful in Amway how come you’re driving a piece of shit 1972 Pinto?
  28. I heard Amway sells prestige tampons.
  29. No I’m not willing to pay more money for quality products.
  30. That Amway food bar you gave me tasted like shit!
  31. How come you’re too embarrassed to tell anyone you’re with Amway?
  32. Why are you lying to me?
  33. Why do you have to get permission from your upline before doing anything?
  34. How many customers do you have?
  35. How much money do you make each month in Amway sales?
  36. I heard the only way to make money in Amway is by selling motivational tools.
  37. I’ll be successful just by going to Amway meetings and doing nothing else?
  38. I heard Amway destroys relationships.
  39. The only people who get rich in Amway are at the top of the pyramid.
  40. You can’t brainwash me asshole!
  41. How many grand openings are you planning to hold? Wasn’t one enough?
  42. Submit to upline? Are you fucking crazy? Cult! Cult! Cult!
  43. As a matter of fact I do like my job.
  44. What qualifications does your upline have as counsellors?
  45. Jesus Christ! Get off your fucking phone! Its after midnight! Doesn’t your fucking upline ever go to sleep?
  46. How come Amway dishwasher soap costs twice as much as other brands and it only gets half the dishes clean?
  47. Why does Amway sell towels that fall apart?
  48. Sniped any prospects at the grocery store lately?
  49. How many people you got on your name list?
  50. Your Amway upline leader says you’re not allowed to watch TV? Sounds like a cult to me!
  51. Let me give you a good suggestion what you can do with those fucking Amway tapes!
  52. Where am I going to find 6 people open to being scammed?
  53. Who gives a shit if a Diamond is speaking tonight?
  54. How come Amway’s shipping costs are so high? I only have to spend $25 with Amazon to get free shipping.
  55. Why do you refer to Amway as “the business”? What’s the big secret to calling it what it is?
  56. Who’s the fucking moron that told you Amway is the only recession proof business?
  57. Hey did you see the Dateline expose on the Amway scam?
  58. Amway’s an expensive social club.
  59. What do you mean you’re cleaning your Platinum’s house for free every week?
  60. Why do Amway meetings last until way past midnight?
  61. Show me your Amway profit and loss statement.
  62. Amway is creepy.
  63. So what if I’m a broke loser for the rest of my life. Its better than being a good for nothing, lying, scumbucket Amway IBO so fuck off!
  64. I’ve got better things to do with my life than go to your dumb ass Family Reunion.
  65. I’m trading hours for dollars? Well at least its better than being in Amway and trading hours for pennies.
  66. Why’s everything in Amway so secretive?
  67. Wow! You spend so much time doing Amway shit when do you have time for fun?
  68. If David Shores really paid cash for his house how did it get foreclosed?
  69. My wife is already free. What’s it to you anyway?
  70. Mind your own goddamned business!
  71. You’re a cult leader in training.
  72. How do you say fuck in igbo?
  73. The secret to Amway success is ripping off your customers.
  74. So what if I have an employee mentality. Its better than having a brainwashed ambot mentality.
  75. Who cares?
  76. How many Amway meetings each week?
  77. Who is Orrin Woodward?
  78. Don’t get bitchy with me! You dragged me out to this fucking Amway meeting because you wanted my opinion. I gave you my opinion! Its a fucking scam!
  79. I already am my own boss.
  80. If Amway Diamonds make so much money why did Greg Duncan declare bankruptcy?
  81. Sure I look at other ways of making money. How do you like my new printing press over there?
  82. When you’re financially free in two to five years come back and show me your plan then.
  83. I don’t punch a time clock but I’d sure like to punch you!
  84. Open your fucking ears and eyes! Amway is a scam!
  85. Why do you need permission to talk to your crossline?
  86. Been to Barnes & Noble lately?
  87. Why don’t you just tell me what your business opportunity is so I don’t have to go to your meeting.
  88. How come you have to write checks payable to cash? Sounds like tax evasion to me.
  89. Ever hear of the 15 second introduction? You should be able to say who you are and what you do in under 15 seconds. If it takes you a 3 hour meeting to spit it out you’re a fucking loser.
  90. No I don’t want to support your business because you’re too high priced.
  91. WWDB stands for World Wide Destructive Bastards
  92. Walmart has lower prices and better products.
  93. Are you stupid?
  94. It costs ten bucks to go to an Amway meeting? Rip off!
  95. CD’s cost how much?
  96. Ha ha! Did you seriously just call yourself an Amway warrior?
  97. How come there are stories all over the Internet about how much money people are losing in the Amway scam?
  98. Your upline says you have to ask permission before you can buy a new fridge? Holy shit! And you say you’re not in a cult!
  99. I’ve heard there’s some fat IBO’s. Does that mean the $500 Amway diet plan doesn’t work?
  100. What’s it like living inside a pyramid?
  101. Why does Amway ruin marriages?
Oh I’ve got more. I just promised to stop at 101!


  1. Here are a few more:

    1. Why do you Amway guys all wear the same crappy, cheap business suit?

    2. Is it OK to join Amway if I'm a transgendered pedophile?

    3. Is it true that Dexter Yager beats up his wife Birdie if she doesn't have sex with him?

    4. Excuse me, but you seem to have mistaken me for someone who actually gives a shit.

    5. I've already tried several Amway products, and frankly they suck.

    6. This Energy Bar you gave me tastes like corrugated cardboard with a chocolate coating.

    7. This "function" that you've dragged me to looks like a convention of maniacs on amphetamines.

    8. That Diamond you just introduced me to has a cute wife. Do you think there's a chance I could seduce her while her husband is giving that interminable speech?

    9. Frankly, I can't conceive of Ada, Michigan as being the center of the universe.

    10. That guy over there is your Platinum? The middle-aged, overweight schmuck with a bad haircut?

    1. LOL Anonymous! Those are some good ones! Maybe we need to keep adding on to this list whenever it comes up in the rotation like we do with the 100 + ways Ambots say negative.

    2. 11. So you've been doing this for two years? Can I see your financial report?

      12. If you're your own boss, why do you have to report to upline all the time?

      13. If being someone's employee is the same thing as being their bitch. . .why are you trying to add me to your downline?

      14. Why don't any of the Amway tapes give actual business advice?

      15. Why would I pay $30 for a tube of lipstick when I can get a GOOD, high end lipstick for half of that? And I don't have to wait on shipping.

      16. So how much does your upline make?

      17. If a portion of your commission goes to upline. . .aren't you just working so they can get rich?

      18. What are working conditions like for the people who make Amway products?

      19. Can I read some consumer reviews of Amway products before I decide to buy them?

      20. Wouldn't you be able to sell more and bring more money into the company if you could distribute through eBay or Amazon?

      21. If MLMs were the best business model, everyone would use them.

      22. You've read over 20 self-help books? How much help do you NEED? Maybe you should see a therapist.

      23. Why don't the Diamonds just broadcast their presentations as webinars and let their downline hear their advice for free?

      24. If Amway is an MLM, why can I order their products off their website? Isn't that robbing you?

      25. If your upline diamonds are making so much, why don't they pay you?

      26. LipSense and Mary Kay sell really nice products, and Avon's products are good and usually reasonably priced. What makes Amway products better than what I'd get at Walmart?

      27. How many customers do you have?

      28. How big does your downline need to be before you're actually making money?

      29. If Amway doesn't work out, how are you going to put this experience on your resume?

      30. Less than one in a hundred people actually make money with MLMs. What makes you think you're that special?

    3. Hey Ally, those are some good ones! LOL! We can always use more ways to piss off Amway Ambots. I might have to do a revised post!

  2. I am tempted to attend amway meetings (if someone invites me) in shorts and tank tops, giving people dabs instead of hand shakes and start yawning loudly throughout the speeches.

    1. tr3nchwarfar3 - it's really tempting for so many of us if we get invited to a Scamway meeting to go and dress inappropriately (as perceived by the Amway cult leaders) and cause a ruckus. But then that would be 20 minutes of your life you wouldn't get back. And I saw 20 minutes is probably the turning point of putting up with the bullshit and standing up and cursing out the lying scamming Amway cult leader and then leaving.


Comments are moderated but we publish just about everything. Even brainwashed ambots who show up here to accuse us of not trying hard enough and that we are lazy, quitters, negative, unchristian dreamstealers. Like we haven’t heard that Amspeak abuse from the assholes in our upline!

If your comment didn’t get published it could be one of these reasons:
1. Is it the weekend? We don’t moderate comments on weekends. Maybe not every day during the week either. Patience.
2. Racist/bigoted comments? Take that shit somewhere else.
3. Naming names? Public figures like politicians and actors and people known in Amway are probably OK – the owners, Diamonds with CDs or who speak at functions, people in Amway’s publicity department who write press releases and blogs. Its humiliating for people to admit their association with Amway so respect their privacy if they’re not out there telling everyone about the love of their life.
4. Gossip that serves no purpose. There are other places to dish about what Diamonds are having affairs or guessing why they’re getting divorced. If you absolutely must share that here – don’t name names. I get too many nosy ambots searching for this. Lets not help them find this shit.
5. Posting something creepy anonymously and we can’t track your location because you’re on a mobile device or using hide my ass or some other proxy. I attracted an obsessed fan and one of my blog administrators attracted a cyberstalker. Lets keep it safe for everyone. Anonymous is OK. Creepy anonymous and hiding – go fuck yourselves!
6. Posting something that serves no purpose other than to cause fighting.
7. Posting bullshit Amway propaganda. We might publish that comment to make fun of you. Otherwise take your agenda somewhere else. Not interested.
8. Notice how this blog is written in English? That's our language so keep your comments in English too. If you leave a comment written in another language then we either have to use Google translate to put it into English so everyone can understand what you wrote or we can hit the Delete button. Guess which one is easier for us to do?
9. We suspect you're a troublemaking Amway asshole.
10. Your comment got caught in the spam filter. Gets checked occasionally. We’ll get to you eventually and approve it as long as it really isn’t spam.