Friday, June 14, 2024

Amway Gives Your Wallet A Beating!

Thanks Ray! One of our talented readers who provided this wonderful prose!

 

If you go to an Amway meeting,
they will teach you to give your wallet a beating.

Boxes of Amway you will be receiving,
while your bank account will keep depleting.

As your closets fill with Amway junk,
you say "what the hell",

They made it sound like in the meetings,
that this Amway crap would sell.

You'll be encouraged to feed your upline beast,
who's draining your savings at the very least.

They will sell you CDs to keep you stayin',
to wash your brain while you hope in vain.

Your friends won't want to be around you
while you're an Ambot hack.

But when you break free and leave the cult,
your true friends will still be there to welcome you back.

 

 

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2 comments:

  1. AnonymousJune 14, 2024 at 4:29 PM

    Brilliant!

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Anna BananaJune 17, 2024 at 9:11 AM

      Perhaps the Goads can buy the rights from Ray and it'll be their next top hit for Amway Ambots!

      Delete

Comments are moderated but we publish just about everything. Even brainwashed ambots who show up here to accuse us of not trying hard enough and that we are lazy, quitters, negative, unchristian dreamstealers. Like we haven’t heard that Amspeak abuse from the assholes in our upline!

If your comment didn’t get published it could be one of these reasons:
1. Is it the weekend? We don’t moderate comments on weekends. Maybe not every day during the week either. Patience.
2. Racist/bigoted comments? Take that shit somewhere else.
3. Naming names? Public figures like politicians and actors and people known in Amway are probably OK – the owners, Diamonds with CDs or who speak at functions, people in Amway’s publicity department who write press releases and blogs. Its humiliating for people to admit their association with Amway so respect their privacy if they’re not out there telling everyone about the love of their life.
4. Gossip that serves no purpose. There are other places to dish about what Diamonds are having affairs or guessing why they’re getting divorced. If you absolutely must share that here – don’t name names. I get too many nosy ambots searching for this. Lets not help them find this shit.
5. Posting something creepy anonymously and we can’t track your location because you’re on a mobile device or using hide my ass or some other proxy. I attracted an obsessed fan and one of my blog administrators attracted a cyberstalker. Lets keep it safe for everyone. Anonymous is OK. Creepy anonymous and hiding – go fuck yourselves!
6. Posting something that serves no purpose other than to cause fighting.
7. Posting bullshit Amway propaganda. We might publish that comment to make fun of you. Otherwise take your agenda somewhere else. Not interested.
8. Notice how this blog is written in English? That's our language so keep your comments in English too. If you leave a comment written in another language then we either have to use Google translate to put it into English so everyone can understand what you wrote or we can hit the Delete button. Guess which one is easier for us to do?
9. We suspect you're a troublemaking Amway asshole.
10. Your comment got caught in the spam filter. Gets checked occasionally. We’ll get to you eventually and approve it as long as it really isn’t spam.

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