Amway Losers Love Trading Business Cards

When we were in Amway the assholes in our upline told us that now we were “business owners” to figure out a business name to call the company. To hell with going through any proper measures to legally register the business name just in case someone else has already legally registered it. Just choose a name and use it. And then because you “own your own business” you can give yourself any title that you choose.

Then the ambots are told to make up business cards to pass out to potential prospects and customers so they’d run out and buy business card sheets so they could make up their own cards on their computer. Mostly ambots passed out these business cards among themselves because nobody else wanted them and they would all ooohhh and aaaahhhh with all the fakey nicey nice over the top compliments. I saw more fucked up pieces of shitty pretend businesses on these cards than you could imagine.

Like any nightmare I don’t remember any phony ass business names that ambots chose for their phony business but some of the titles I remember. And the business cards looked like shit. The home made jobs where you use some clip art program on your computer to put a beach or mansion or sports car or sacks of money on the business card. I don’t remember anyone using Amway logo but I do remember some of them using pictures of Amway products which is probably a violation of Amway’s policy but ambots don’t give a flying fuck about those kind of details.

So I’d get passed these business cards that would read something like:



My Fucked Up Phony Ass Amway Business

Asshole Ambot

President and CEO of Bullshit





The titles were all over the place: president, CEO, manager, vice president of operations – those vice president titles would be on the wife’s business cards! That’s how it is in Amway. The wives are always second. Oh what the fuck am I thinking! Wives are way further down than second!

That’s part of running a phony business with a phony business name. You can give yourself a phony business title to make you look all big and important.

What are better titles that should be on Amway Ambot business cards? Or at least more honest titles:

Fucking Asshole

Liar

Scammer

Sack Of Shit

Dumb Fuck

Phony Bastard

Loser

Troublemaking Bastard

Head Bullshitter

Miserable Son Of a Bitch

Ass Kisser

Dreamstealer

Negative Bastard

Angry Piece of Shit

Sneering Snide Son of A Bitch

Fake Fucking Fruitloop

Mall & Grocery Store Stalker Extrodanaire

Lying, Pretending and Faking is my Specialty

Overpriced Soap Pusher

Love Bombing and Psychological Manipulation Inc.


These ambots sit around at work all day dreaming of how rich they’re going to be thanks to Amway and how they own their own business and how that makes them better than everyone else they work with and they got the business cards to prove it.

Putting on a business suit, pretending how busy you are on your cell phone, and playing 8pm warrior going to Amway meetings, and passing out phony ass business cards with fake names and titles does not make you a real business owner.