Married to an Ambot: Mr Amway Ambot Louse – Don’t Touch That With a 39 And A Half Foot Pole!

Thursday, December 16, 2021

Mr Amway Ambot Louse – Don’t Touch That With a 39 And A Half Foot Pole!

Thanks to one of our readers for this Christmas poem set to the Grinch music!

You're a mean one, Mr Louse
You really are a heel
You're as cuddly as a cactus
You're as charming as an eel
Mr. Louse, you're a bad banana

(Mr. Louse), with the greasy black peel

You're a vile one, Mr Louse
You got termites in your smile
You have all the tender sweetness
Of a seasick crocodile (Mr. Louse)

You're a foul one, Mr Louse
Friends, you don't have none
I wouldn't touch you with a thirty-nine-and-a-half foot pole!

You're a monster, Mr Louse
Your heart's an empty hole

You're a goner, Mr Louse
You got garlic in your soul, Mr. Louse

2 comments:

AnonymousDecember 18, 2021 at 10:21 AM
Dear Anna --

Here's another one that I've written for you:

(Sing to the tune of "Santa Claus Is Coming To Town")

THE AMWAY CREEP IS COMING TO TOWN

You better watch out.
Keep open your eyes.
There's someone about
To tell you damned lies --
The Amway Creep is coming to town!

He's making a list.
He's checking it twice --
He's gonna seek out
Folks stupid as lice.
The Amway Creep is coming to town!

He bothers you in bookstores,
He pesters you in malls --
He even tries to sign up folks
While they're in toilet stalls!

So -- you better watch out.
You sure better try
To avoid the damned lout.
I'm telling you why --
The Amway Creep is coming to town!

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Comments are moderated but we publish just about everything. Even brainwashed ambots who show up here to accuse us of not trying hard enough and that we are lazy, quitters, negative, unchristian dreamstealers. Like we haven’t heard that Amspeak abuse from the assholes in our upline!

If your comment didn’t get published it could be one of these reasons:
1. Is it the weekend? We don’t moderate comments on weekends. Maybe not every day during the week either. Patience.
2. Racist/bigoted comments? Take that shit somewhere else.
3. Naming names? Public figures like politicians and actors and people known in Amway are probably OK – the owners, Diamonds with CDs or who speak at functions, people in Amway’s publicity department who write press releases and blogs. Its humiliating for people to admit their association with Amway so respect their privacy if they’re not out there telling everyone about the love of their life.
4. Gossip that serves no purpose. There are other places to dish about what Diamonds are having affairs or guessing why they’re getting divorced. If you absolutely must share that here – don’t name names. I get too many nosy ambots searching for this. Lets not help them find this shit.
5. Posting something creepy anonymously and we can’t track your location because you’re on a mobile device or using hide my ass or some other proxy. I attracted an obsessed fan and one of my blog administrators attracted a cyberstalker. Lets keep it safe for everyone. Anonymous is OK. Creepy anonymous and hiding – go fuck yourselves!
6. Posting something that serves no purpose other than to cause fighting.
7. Posting bullshit Amway propaganda. We might publish that comment to make fun of you. Otherwise take your agenda somewhere else. Not interested.
8. Notice how this blog is written in English? That's our language so keep your comments in English too. If you leave a comment written in another language then we either have to use Google translate to put it into English so everyone can understand what you wrote or we can hit the Delete button. Guess which one is easier for us to do?
9. We suspect you're a troublemaking Amway asshole.
10. Your comment got caught in the spam filter. Gets checked occasionally. We’ll get to you eventually and approve it as long as it really isn’t spam.