Monday, August 25, 2014
Who Wants To Listen To A Screeching Amway Ambot?
I’m sure there are many wives, family and friends of ambots out there who hated listening to the dreaded Amway tapes or CD’s that were purchased weekly. Invest in your Amway business demand the fucking Amway cult leaders when what they really mean is invest in our tool scam and make us Amway cult leaders richer.
These tapes and CD’s the Amway upline said were crucial to building your business! “If you’re serious about building your business you must buy the tapes!” That was the broken record recording from the Amway cult leader.
Not a single one of those CD’s offered any solid business advice. Mostly they’re what could loosely be termed motivational or more correctly “see how I overcame life’s obstacles to become successful at Amway”. These bastards all have the same story told slightly differently. The wife works at McDonald’s. The husband works on a pig farm shovelling shit. Their meager incomes barely cover their monthly living expenses. Then a very dear friend showed them the Amway plan. They had to scrape money together to make it to the Amway functions. And how come every one of them had to borrow $20 from a relative to put gas in the car’s tank to drive to a function? And now look at them. They worked hard abusing their downline and now they have a mansion and fancy cars and walk the beaches of the world.
Its bad enough listening to this shit. But get this. Ambot cranked the stereo. Now it became like one of those fire and brimstone sermons southern revival meeting held underneath a big tent that I’ve seen in the movies where the preacher is screaming at the congregation at the top of his lungs so that they can find salvation.
Play any one of those Amway tapes or CD’s with the stereo cranked and you get the same results: ARE YOU CORE? WHY NOT????? ARE YOU TAKING DOUBLE X EVERY DAY? DO YOU KNOW WHAT WILL HAPPEN TO YOU IF YOU DON’T TAKE NUTRILITE VITAMINS? YOUR BODY WILL SHUT DOWN AND DIE!!!!!
Oh my God. I hated those tapes! All those fucking Amway assholes screeching at the top of their lungs. What was even worse was sometimes we’d be driving friends or family somewhere and Ambot would blast the stereo. Very rude! How are we supposed to have a conversation with our guests with some Amway asshole on a CD screaming: DON’T DRESS LIKE A SLUT FOR BUSINESS MEETINGS!!!!!!!!!
Its bad enough listening to that shit at normal volume but cranked as high as the car stereo will go? Ohhhh. Shudders. The horror of it.
Then there are the stacks of CD’s that were never opened and listened to. We were always told that our sponsor and/or upline would take them back and refund our money. Nope, that was another lie. When Ambot got out he asked his sponsor Captain Fuck Up to take the unopened CD’s back and refund his money. Captain Fuck Up refused stating he was broke and had no money to refund him. Well of course he’s broke – he’s in Amway! Ambot went further upline and finally got someone who offered ten cents apiece. Well yeah even at ten cents that’s too much money for that shit but Ambot bought them for $2 to $5 apiece mostly on the higher end $5 there weren’t too many that were cheaper than that but there were some and that money was paid to Captain Fuck Up who didn’t always give him the CD’s he’d purchased because he’s a disorganized asshole and couldn’t find them.
To this day every now and then I come across an Amway CD that got stuck inbetween books or real CD’s of singers we like or crammed at the back of a cupboard and when I pull something out this piece of shit Amway CD falls out and promptly gets a one way trip to the trash can.
Yep we’re just a couple more suckers who got ripped off in more ways than one being in the Amway business.
Yup its time to send out another big old FUCK YOU to Amway!