'Twas the night before Christmas, and all through the house
Not a creature was stirring save Ambot the Louse.
He went to each stocking and took out good stuff
And filled them with Amway crap -- more than enough
To turn the whole holiday into a flop:
Soap products, toothpaste, and other pure slop.
Ambot the Louse took his big stolen stash
Down to a pawnshop, and hocked it for cash
Which he then sent up-line to some Platinum fucks
Who mailed him CDs in exchange for the bucks.