Wednesday, January 10, 2018

Amway Ambots Aspire To Be Members Of The Secret Knowledge Club

Amway is full of secrets. Ambots would even claim that the secret to financial success is becoming an Amway salesperson.

Our sack of shit Platinum was always holding it over our heads that he held the secret to becoming successful in Amway even though after 10 or 15 years or however long he was in he still had failed to move on to the hallowed ground of Emerald or Diamond before Amway fired him. He’s got to start all over with Monavie but he brought over a lot of his former Amway downline to give him a head start to hitting those goals with his new pyramid scheme. And since this post originally appeared Monavie is no more.

But whatever - it was something the sack of shit gloatingly held over our heads. He held the secret and wouldn’t we want to be in his good books and become a member of the Amway secret knowledge club that he was an esteemed member of and learn from him.

Gag! Puke! Fuck you you sack of shit Platinum. The only knowledge I want from you is how we can quit and get back the time and money we wasted on Amway.

So what secrets do Amway and their brainwashed ambots hold? Actually that’s too broad a question. Amway the company has all kinds of secrets like how much they’re paying ambots in commission each month and breaking it down into a table so prospects can fully understand the business they’re getting into and potential profits they can expect to receive. And how much money they must spend each month on Amway related products and activities. Also how many Amway products are sold to people who are not registered IBO’s, in other words how likely it is to find customers who are not ambots and who want to buy overpriced shitty products. How many Diamonds there are. How much does each Amway product cost to produce and what is the mark up that ambots get dinged with. Those kind of things.

I’ll leave Amway the company out of this discussion. This is all about trashing the fucking assholes in the Amway upline. If I have to trash Amway in the process so be it but not the primary objective.

So what secrets do our Amway upline hold. Part of the secret knowledge club means knowing how to scam and brainwash others. From what I’ve observed here are some characteristics some of the people in our upline held. Fucking assholes like our sponsor and his sponsor didn’t have these traits. The scary thing is some of these traits are not really all that bad. The difference is the people who like everyone they meet and get along well with others who have no ulterior motive in mind other than being a good friend or a good salesperson as opposed to Amway scammers who are only out to rip off others.
1.      Likeable, personable, ability to relate well with just about everyone.
2.      Have an answer for everything.
3.      Offers expensive coaching, mentoring sessions.
4.      Calmly deal with unhappy customers, downline.
5.      Able to bullshit their way out of any sticky situation.
6.      Good speaker, good rapport with an audience.
7.      Ability to put people at ease.
8.      Good at selling: Amway products, business plan, tickets to functions, etc.

Members of Amway’s secret knowledge club learn the above secrets and how to effectively put them to use so the victim does not realize they’re being scammed. Befriend the victim. Be the victim’s best friend. Brainwash them to buy overpriced useless Amway products and pay big bucks to attend Amway functions under the scam that shelling out the money is the secret to Amway success.

Being a member of Amway’s secret knowledge club is learning how to use your powers for evil instead of good.


  1. The whole secret of Amway is this:

    Rip your down-line off, and at the same time convince them that they are on their way to getting rich.

    1. Yup and now the secret is out about those lying scamming Amway Ambots.


Comments are moderated but we publish just about everything. Even brainwashed ambots who show up here to accuse us of not trying hard enough and that we are lazy, quitters, negative, unchristian dreamstealers. Like we haven’t heard that Amspeak abuse from the assholes in our upline!

If your comment didn’t get published it could be one of these reasons:
1. Is it the weekend? We don’t moderate comments on weekends. Maybe not every day during the week either. Patience.
2. Racist/bigoted comments? Take that shit somewhere else.
3. Naming names? Public figures like politicians and actors and people known in Amway are probably OK – the owners, Diamonds with CDs or who speak at functions, people in Amway’s publicity department who write press releases and blogs. Its humiliating for people to admit their association with Amway so respect their privacy if they’re not out there telling everyone about the love of their life.
4. Gossip that serves no purpose. There are other places to dish about what Diamonds are having affairs or guessing why they’re getting divorced. If you absolutely must share that here – don’t name names. I get too many nosy ambots searching for this. Lets not help them find this shit.
5. Posting something creepy anonymously and we can’t track your location because you’re on a mobile device or using hide my ass or some other proxy. I attracted an obsessed fan and one of my blog administrators attracted a cyberstalker. Lets keep it safe for everyone. Anonymous is OK. Creepy anonymous and hiding – go fuck yourselves!
6. Posting something that serves no purpose other than to cause fighting.
7. Posting bullshit Amway propaganda. We might publish that comment to make fun of you. Otherwise take your agenda somewhere else. Not interested.
8. Notice how this blog is written in English? That's our language so keep your comments in English too. If you leave a comment written in another language then we either have to use Google translate to put it into English so everyone can understand what you wrote or we can hit the Delete button. Guess which one is easier for us to do?
9. We suspect you're a troublemaking Amway asshole.
10. Your comment got caught in the spam filter. Gets checked occasionally. We’ll get to you eventually and approve it as long as it really isn’t spam.