Sunday, December 1, 2024

The 25 Days Of (Amway) Christmas

Thanks to one of our readers who came up with more lyrics we had to change the title from 12 to 16 to 22 and now 25!

Your Amway upline will NEVER be your true love by the way! LOL!

 

On the first day of Christmas, my upline gave to me: Some products that were really shit-TY..

On the 2nd day of Christmas, my upline gave to me: more unhealthy brainwashing and mind spanking for me!!

On the third day of Christmas my up-line gave to me: a tin pot in which I could pee.

On the fourth day of Christmas my up-line gave to me: some bullshit from Ki -o - sak - EE.

On the fifth day of Christmas my up-line gave to me: a carton of old L.O.C.

On the sixth day of Christmas my up-line gave to me: some crap cosmetics named Ar-tis-TREE.

On the seventh day of Christmas my up-line gave to me: an order to attend F.E.D!

On the eighth day of Christmas my up-line gave to me: a lecture on my lousy PV.

On the ninth day of Christmas my up-line gave to me: a 2 hour rant that I’m a no-body.

On the tenth day of Christmas my up-line gave to me: a fairy tale that I’m a fran-chi-see.

On the eleventh day of Christmas my up-line gave to me: lies that Amway returns are hassle-free.

On the twelfth day of Christmas my up-line gave to me: A total lie about his mon-EY.….

On the thirteenth day of Christmas, my up-line gave to me: six commands and one desperate plea.

On the fourteenth day of Christmas, my up-line gave to me: A face-slap and a kick in my knee.

On the fifteenth day of Christmas, my up-line gave to me: Advice to quit my job and "be free."

On the sixteenth day of Christmas, my up-line gave to me: Nothing but unending miser-EE.

On the seventeenth day of Christmas, my up-line gave to me: the evidence that he was a chimpanzee.

On the eighteenth day of Christmas my up-line gave to me: a bill for my CommuniKate fee.

On the nineteenth day of Christmas my up-line gave to me: some Nutrilite to mix in my tea.

On the twentieth day of Christmas my up-line gave to me: absolute proof of his stupidi-TY.

On the twenty-first day of Christmas my up-line gave to me: some brainless bullshit on a CD.

On the twenty-second day of Christmas my up-line gave to me: an album of the Goads' jamboree.

On the twenty-third day of Christmas my up-line gave to me: a lecture on Amway poli-CY.

On the twenty-fourth day of Christmas my up-line gave to me: enough grief to ruin my Christmas glee.

On the twenty-fifth day of Christmas my up-line gave to me: an order to buy an Amway Christmas tree.

 

 

4 comments:

  1. On the twenty-sixth day of Christmas, my up-line gave to me: some lies with which I could not agree.

    On the twenty-seventh day of Christmas, my up-line gave to me: his crazy plans for a wild spending spree.

    On the twenty-eighth day of Christmas, my up-line gave to me: some violent threats that caused me to flee.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. LOL Anonymous. If this keeps up we'll have to start running this post in October!

      Delete
    2. There won't be any more, Anna. I've run out of --ee rhymes.

      Delete
    3. Ha ha yes I can see how you'd eventually run out of material!

      Delete

Comments are moderated but we publish just about everything. Even brainwashed ambots who show up here to accuse us of not trying hard enough and that we are lazy, quitters, negative, unchristian dreamstealers. Like we haven’t heard that Amspeak abuse from the assholes in our upline!

If your comment didn’t get published it could be one of these reasons:
1. Is it the weekend? We don’t moderate comments on weekends. Maybe not every day during the week either. Patience.
2. Racist/bigoted comments? Take that shit somewhere else.
3. Naming names? Public figures like politicians and actors and people known in Amway are probably OK – the owners, Diamonds with CDs or who speak at functions, people in Amway’s publicity department who write press releases and blogs. Its humiliating for people to admit their association with Amway so respect their privacy if they’re not out there telling everyone about the love of their life.
4. Gossip that serves no purpose. There are other places to dish about what Diamonds are having affairs or guessing why they’re getting divorced. If you absolutely must share that here – don’t name names. I get too many nosy ambots searching for this. Lets not help them find this shit.
5. Posting something creepy anonymously and we can’t track your location because you’re on a mobile device or using hide my ass or some other proxy. I attracted an obsessed fan and one of my blog administrators attracted a cyberstalker. Lets keep it safe for everyone. Anonymous is OK. Creepy anonymous and hiding – go fuck yourselves!
6. Posting something that serves no purpose other than to cause fighting.
7. Posting bullshit Amway propaganda. We might publish that comment to make fun of you. Otherwise take your agenda somewhere else. Not interested.
8. Notice how this blog is written in English? That's our language so keep your comments in English too. If you leave a comment written in another language then we either have to use Google translate to put it into English so everyone can understand what you wrote or we can hit the Delete button. Guess which one is easier for us to do?
9. We suspect you're a troublemaking Amway asshole.
10. Your comment got caught in the spam filter. Gets checked occasionally. We’ll get to you eventually and approve it as long as it really isn’t spam.