Umm. You put the tape into a cassette player, push the play button, and listen to it?
Years ago I worked for a company that was located in a 5 story building. A couple of other companies had offices in the our building. I was down on the main floor bringing some work to the receptionist and probably chatting for a few minutes. A couple walked across the lobby and got into the elevator. The man - in his 20’s - held the door open, poked his head out, and called over:
“Which button do I press for the third floor?”
“Three?” The receptionist suggests in the tone she uses when dealing with idiots.
The elevator door closes and we break down laughing.
OK well maybe you had to be there....
Perhaps this poor lost IBO has already asked his upline that question and didn’t get a satisfactory answer so he now takes to the Internet in his quest to find that information and ends up at my post about Amway CD’s and tapes.
“How to listen to Amway tapes?”
Hmm, maybe you should be drunk first? Turn the volume way down so you don't piss off anyone else within earshot. Do whatever it takes not to get brainwashed by that shit. A better plan would be to burn them.
I wonder if IBOFB is reading this post. He’ll be shitting his pants demanding who has got their hands on Amway tapes because he claims they went out with the last century.
How to listen to Amway tapes:
ReplyDelete1) purchase an Amway tape for $6 from your upline OR used for $0.01 on ebay.
2) place tape in an Amway brand paper bag. if the bag is defective, throw it out until you find a functional bag.
3) soak bag with Amway brand lighter fluid. also soak bag with leading brand fluid in case Amway brand lighter fluid won't burn. hide leading brand under your bed in case upline comes to audit your pantry.
4) strike Amway brand match. if first match won't ignite, throw it out and keep striking matches until one ignites. light fluid-soaked bag.
5) listen to the Amway tape go SNAP, CRACKLE, POP!
This has been "how to listen to Amway tapes"
Ha ha John! That works too. If that searcher comes back I hope he finds these instructions very helpful!
ReplyDeleteI think that maybe, just maybe, the search simply wants to find out what is the content of Amway tapes (oops, CD) without actually having to subject yourself to such cruel and unusual punishment.
ReplyDeleteIn that case, you can simply go to http://bwwsot.blogspot.com/ where former IBO gave detailed information/analysis on BWW (an Amway Motivational Org) tapes (oops, CD).
Seriously, Dave Severn explained to us nimrods how to 'listen' to an amway tape, er, CASSETTE TAPE.
ReplyDeleteStep 1. buy CASSETTE TAPE, er, buy several CASSETTE TAPES.
Step 2. set CASSETTE TAPE recorder on table (be careful here, you're handling holy stuff)
Step 3. carefully and prayfully unwrap said CASSETTE TAPE(s)
Step 4. with holy reverence, place CASSETTE TAPE into tape recorder
Step 5. at this point, you need to stop for a moment of silence
Step 6. press play
Step 7. listen and dab at eyes (these are your leaders speaking)
Step 8. take copious notes
Step 9. when CASSETTE TAPE is finished, bow before your tape recorder
Step 10. carefully remove CASSETTE TAPE from recorder and place in your CASSETTE TAPE shrine.
When done listening to cassette tape (oops CD!) reverently put it into the Shrine of listened to tapes (oops CDs) which is your shredder that can shred CDs. Reverence is the key...
ReplyDeleteAnonymous and David - very true. Those CDs and tapes were to be treated like they were holy water and to be placed in a shrine afterwards.
ReplyDeleteA better plan is to break them into little pieces and flush them down the toilet! That's my Amway shrine!
David, I hear those used CD's can command upward of 2 cents each on ebay in lots of 100. With a year's worth of SOT + 1, you could have yourself 2 dollars in honest to God profit! Oh wait...I got gross and net confused again. Turns out that is actually a 598 dollar loss :( Where ever did I learn my accounting from???
ReplyDeleteJohn: It looks to me like you learned your accounting from your upline while you were in the biz. You may want to concentrate on that aspect in your deprogramming. LOL! I'm afraid my listened to tapes (oops! CDs) would raise havoc with my septic system.
ReplyDeleteThere's even a website that specialize in buying these tapes AND CDs, and then turn around and sell it for a profit!
ReplyDeletehttp://home.earthlink.net/~tool_depot/id16.html
See, you CAN make money in Amway, just don't become an IBO ... :)
Somebody showed up on my blog today after doing a Google search for free Amway CD's. Maybe there's not as much profit in them after all if you can get them for free!
ReplyDeleteFunny stuff!
ReplyDeleteI was abandoned by my loyal upline of "spiritual and life mentors" even after breaking two legs and many other fast tracks even while remaining the widest on the entire team. I guess keeping your word doesn't apply anymore even in the "greatest" business on earth!
One time I burned all my BWW (Butt World Wide or Beelzebub World Wide) tapes, CD's, promos, etc, etc, etc, etc, etc, etc, etc............ and they put off blue flames and cracked and popped with spirits screaming as they dissipated into the atmosphere!
Now, after at least $10,000's of dollars (probably $250,000 no lie or more after gas, plane tickets, function tickets, hotels, incentive trips, "free trips", tool orders, team cookouts and incentives, product orders for PV when I didn't always need it, furniture for team events, the right clothes, etc.) "invested" into "my" biz even under 10 years of building it, I have two downline Platinums that fizzled out because my awesome upline left me when he said he wouldn't when the going gets tough, and the IRS is still asking for money.
Great Business - J/K
Thanks for stopping by sdcoffee! Glad you find it funny. A lot of former IBO's find my blog funny. When they laugh at my upline they're laughing at their own too!
DeleteYup, abandoned by your BFF's! That's the Amway way! Fickle friends in this cult!
Great imagery burning your tapes and CDs!
Oh my gosh I think you're the unfortunate winner of the highest amount of losses ever recorded in the comments section of my blog. Some of my readers lost small amounts $1000 give or take but most have been in the thousands usually $25 - $50k in losses depending on how long they stayed in Scamway. Its stories like yours that still don't get through to new Amway recruits or those who've been in long enough to file tax returns and write off everything to do with their phony Amway business only to end up in deep shit with the IRS. The smart ass ambots say it will never happen to them because they are winners. And they'll say that you didn't try hard enough.
So if any brainwashed ambots show up here with one of their superior canned Amspeak responses - here's an advance fuck off!
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ReplyDeleteMy husband left me for another woman 3 months ago and ever since then my life have been filled with pains sorrow and heart break because he was my first love whom i have spent my entire life with. A friend of mine told me he saw some testimonies of a spell caster called Dr Mamudu that he can bring back lover within some few days, i laugh it out and said i am not interested but because of the love my friend had for me, she consulted the great priest on my behalf and to my greatest surprise after 2 days my husband called me for the very first time after three months that he is missing me and that he is so sorry for every thing he made me went through.He came back to me and now we are happy together. I still can’t believe it, because it highly unbelievable. Thank you Dr.Mamudu for bringing back my lover and also to my lovely friend who interceded on my behalf, for any one who might need the help of this great priest here is the email address: drmamudu47@gmail. com , you can also call him or add him on Whats-app: +2348143284524
ahsley - for fuck's sake why would you want to take his cheating ass back? Have some respect for yourself and find a man who can keep his zipper up. Once a cheater always a cheater. Who knows what the area code is for Nigeria? Here's a hint. 234. What's worse? A fucking Amway scammer or a fucking Nigerian scammer?
Delete