I don't even know where to start. I would however, like you to say out loud, Anna- "I tried to tell you." I read your blog back in the beginning of April, before I was convinced to sign up as an IBO and sign my life away to this scheme. The person who sponsored me is my personal trainer, as well as my client in my real job- Advertising Manager for our local paper. I totally trusted him (and still do in other aspects of life) and I let my trust of he and his wife bring me on in the business. I spent hours at open meetings, went to a conference at the end of April and am now being a little chastised for not making enough contacts, not buying my tickets for summer conference, and I am going to miss a meeting I would have to drive 3 hours for tomorrow- a Saturday night in the beginning of summer.
I am a successful, college graduate, single woman. I am 30 years old. I have so many other things I would rather be doing on a Saturday night then driving for 3 hours, paying a $15 fee and listening to the same stuff I've already heard.
Even before I signed up, CDs and books were thrust at me to listen and read. I love to read and have found the books quite useful- in my personal and professional life. However, the CDs make me feel like I am being brainwashed. I was told to listen to them whenever I was in the car. Well, I'm sorry, but I happen to like MUSIC! And cussing, and drinking and dancing. I like using my free time to RELAX!
I have been losing sleep and honestly, not doing my real job to it's full potential because I am so worried about pleasing my upline and the team! I feel like I am in an abusive relationship and I'm cowering in the corner, scared. Everything I have read written by you and by the comments, is so true. It's crazy that this has affected so many people's lives.
I started dating a few weeks ago and my sponsor (also my trainer and client that I have to see 3 days a week) says, "When was I going to find out about him? Oh, he's gotta come to a meeting. We can judge his character by how he reacts to the business" EXCUSE ME?? I don't think it's your job to judge his character and it's awful that I feel ashamed even telling him I am involved in the business!! And I've only been in since mid-April.
The one thing I will say positive about this experience is that I have met a lot of positive and happy people - well, at least they seemed to be, probably all a facade anyway.
I am ready to quit, but I am shaking at the knees, grinding my teeth and losing even more sleep because I don't want to have to face him- yet, I need him to continue his advertising with me and I need to keep working out. I'm terrified. But- I am a grown woman!! I wish he had never crossed a line by inviting me out. I don't want to do that with my friends or people I know. I don't want to expose them to this cult, and yes, it is quite cultlike. I even looked up the exact definition so that I wouldn't feel bad calling it that. But, I drank the kool-aid. I am just trying to spit it out now.
Sorry for the long rambling. I guess this was also a way for me to vent.