Tuesday, November 5, 2013

The Excruciating Horrors Of Working An Amway Function

Just in case any ambots show up here freaking out about how they missed Portland FED “last weekend” when this comment was left on October 15 it was indeed “last weekend” to the writer but wherever it shows up on this blog will be a couple of weeks later. So you ambots don’t have to be dumb fucks anymore than you already are by being all high and mighty that Amway didn’t have a function going on “last weekend” somewhere. I always watched the staff who work at the arenas where Amway functions are being held and wondered what’s going through their minds while they listen to the bullshit being spouted from the assholes up on the stage.

I worked as an usher at the Portland FED event this past weekend. I have worked this event for the past several years, and find it an interesting study in human nature. I came to the conclusion this past weekend that it really is a cult. I understand the human desire to be successful and rich. It is nice to have the feeling that someone else can show you the way to these riches. However, when I heard several of the speakers say that if your family and friends try to talk you out of this endeavor, you need new family and friends (i.e. your Amway family). That is so definitely a cult tactic, it's terrifying. There were a lot of things said by these "diamonds" that were excruciating to me, especially saying anyone who has a "job" is living a life of mediocrity. They didn't use the term "loser," but it was most definitely implied. I work two part-time jobs and am the owner of two small businesses (working on a 3rd). I am very happy and fulfilled and love my jobs and businesses. Every day is a joy and I'm doing fine financially. Please don't call my life mediocre, and know that there is no way on earth I would want to live the Amway lifestyle. Good luck to those of you that do.


  1. I bet this person drives a nicer car than most of the Ambots at the conventions too lol.

    My former upline drove a broken down old truck that actually broke down on the way to a meeting and his downlines rushed to his aid.

    He also talked about how if we can get X amount of downlines we would get 400 bucks a month and then said 'that's a new car payment'. I thought WWDB taught us how to pay cash for everything? Why would you do a monthly car payment?

    1. Rbot - that was nice the ambots rushed to his aid when the truck broke down on the way to a meeting. Most ambots I know would say fuck you I'm too busy worshipping our cult leader to deal with you. Call a tow truck and then call a cab cause you better haul ass to the cult meeting or they'll be shit to pay later if you don't show up!

      If WWDB teaches you to pay cash for everything how come their Diamonds are getting houses foreclosed or bankruptcy proceedings. Surely those kind of things don't happen unless there are creditors lurking in the background.

  2. Diamonds are dumb-fucks whom can’t afford the ground they walk on more-or-less a monthly car payment! They love to boast about money and cars and mansions but when the time comes to BE-REAL, they scamper off like RATS in a sewer. One of these lunatics tried to prospect me a few months ago, I’m driving a 2013 Cadillac CTS-V Luxury Coup. When we’re leaving his eyes almost pop-out of his skull when he lays eyes on my ride. Apparently, he told me inside the café he was pulling anywhere around $5,000-$8,000 a month with a great number of down-lines, and the legs were extensive! He, however was driving a 1993 Dodge Intrepid, nice car back in the day…drove that one once and the Chrysler Concorde as well. He asked me where I worked, I didn’t mentioned names but admitted it was a nine-to-five job, only I decide what shifts to take and which location I prefer over where I’m currently working. I also travel a lot, which can be hectic at times, but the company pays for my cell-phone expenses, my hotel, my meals, and I have a company-credit card in case of emergencies with a hefty sum guaranteed.

    I looked over his ride and joked “Dude, you must be saving large for that mansion huh?”. He picked up on the joke and remarked immediately that he would be investing in his business as much as he could to offer his family a residual income once he was gone.

    Not to offend, but someone gloating about making $5,000 a month could drive something better, wouldn’t they want to?


    1. Hi Sam. I'd say you're in the ballpark that diamonds make $5-$8,000 a month from their commissions. Then they make more from speaking engagements and tool sales. That's a decent income but not when you're trying to impress other Amway dumb fucks that you're a millionaire and going into debt to try to portray this Amway Diamond millionaire lifestyle when the actual income is in the low 6 figures before taxes and expenses. Probably has shitty credit and can't take a loan out for the kind of car their upline tells them they should be driving so they drive an old clunker instead.

      Sounds like you're living the lifestyle that Amway ambots aspire to.

    2. Funny how he 'caught on'
      Ambots are TRAINED to counter argue every statement/thought/reason/excuse you may have. If they teach you anything it is what to say when someone says this or that.

    3. Question: once you are a big pin in shamway (let's say a Diamond) - don't you have to keep up with a certain amount of downline & PV to maintain that status? So in reality you can not "retire" from Shamway and when someone passes away, no way will there be "income" for family.

  3. Anon November 30, you are correct. Unless the diamond has a son or daughter that is willing to take over and is able to keep the business profitable, there will be no residual income rolling in forever like they seem to think. Diamonds and above being able to retire is probably the biggest myth of Amway. It's pretty much still a job. The only difference is you have a bunch of downline worshiping you.


Comments are moderated but we publish just about everything. Even brainwashed ambots who show up here to accuse us of not trying hard enough and that we are lazy, quitters, negative, unchristian dreamstealers. Like we haven’t heard that Amspeak abuse from the assholes in our upline!

If your comment didn’t get published it could be one of these reasons:
1. Is it the weekend? We don’t moderate comments on weekends. Maybe not every day during the week either. Patience.
2. Racist/bigoted comments? Take that shit somewhere else.
3. Naming names? Public figures like politicians and actors and people known in Amway are probably OK – the owners, Diamonds with CDs or who speak at functions, people in Amway’s publicity department who write press releases and blogs. Its humiliating for people to admit their association with Amway so respect their privacy if they’re not out there telling everyone about the love of their life.
4. Gossip that serves no purpose. There are other places to dish about what Diamonds are having affairs or guessing why they’re getting divorced. If you absolutely must share that here – don’t name names. I get too many nosy ambots searching for this. Lets not help them find this shit.
5. Posting something creepy anonymously and we can’t track your location because you’re on a mobile device or using hide my ass or some other proxy. I attracted an obsessed fan and one of my blog administrators attracted a cyberstalker. Lets keep it safe for everyone. Anonymous is OK. Creepy anonymous and hiding – go fuck yourselves!
6. Posting something that serves no purpose other than to cause fighting.
7. Posting bullshit Amway propaganda. We might publish that comment to make fun of you. Otherwise take your agenda somewhere else. Not interested.
8. Notice how this blog is written in English? That's our language so keep your comments in English too. If you leave a comment written in another language then we either have to use Google translate to put it into English so everyone can understand what you wrote or we can hit the Delete button. Guess which one is easier for us to do?
9. We suspect you're a troublemaking Amway asshole.
10. Your comment got caught in the spam filter. Gets checked occasionally. We’ll get to you eventually and approve it as long as it really isn’t spam.