Monday, October 11, 2010
Amway Dog Food
Today I’m going to do an impression of our sack of shit Platinum and go off on an unrelated rant. Unlike him it won’t take half an hour.
I’m going to rant about the shitty Amway dog food. It costs approximately the same as any high end dog food out there. Whether or not it has the same high quality ingredients as other dog food companies I can’t say because I haven’t recently compared. I will say the one time we bought a bag of Amway’s brand dog food that I’ve never seen so much dog shit in my life! I’m the one who usually walks the dogs. I’m more into fitness than Ambot and I walk everywhere and those dogs give me an excuse to get out of the house every couple of hours. I take the dogs out for a walk first thing in the morning. I’ll usually get one shit out of each of them. After we switched them to Amway dog food the morning walk consisted of 4 to 6 shits! Luckily I stuff lots of baggies into my pockets! These dogs were easily shitting 10 times each by the last walk of the night and huge baggy filling ones at that! I'd get home and flush them one at a time and the next thing you'd know the toilet was clogged and the bowl nearly overflowing. The Amway dog food made me very proficient at using a toilet plunger! But I confess. If Ambot was home and the water was rising in the toilet, I'd turn the water off and start screaming that the big shits had plugged the toilet again and make him unclog it.
Ambot tried to put the Amway dog food onto his next order. I told him if he wanted to keep buying the shitty Amway dog food that he would now be taking over full time walking the dogs and cleaning up after them - a task he doesn’t like. I suggested he find someone in his upline to take over the clean up duty if they wanted us to buy Amway dog food. I got no takers. Imagine that!
I was able to put the dogs back onto the high quality, low stool dog food that they’ve enjoyed in the past.
This drastically reduced the money I was spending on baggies.
This also drastically reduced the number of clogged toilets.