Monday, October 3, 2011

What to do in Portland instead of Free Enterprise Days

Amway WWDB is holding Free Enterprise Days in Portland Oregon November 4 to 6 2011.

OK for the most part I’m just copying and pasting from an article I published for Family Reunion.

Sorry Portland! I think I already covered what I deem to be your highlights last time!

However I read a recent article about the top 10 cities for foodies and surprisingly enough to me Portland Oregon was on the list.

Super-green Portland has earned a reputation for its farm-to-table dining, well-crafted microbrews, and 200-odd food trucks. To get a sampling of the most popular — including Namu, excellent Korean-Hawaiian fusion — check out the food truck “pods” at Pioneer Courthouse Square or at SE Hawthorne and 12th Avenue. And don’t be fooled by the notion that these Oregonians are totally health-conscious: another culinary must-stop is Voodoo Doughnuts for its bacon-topped maple bar and the breakfast-cereal-crusted “Captain My Captain.”

The original article is here.

Voodoo Doughnuts! Sounds like my kind of place! A little Google search and I found the web page. 

Over 90 different donuts! I want one of those Voodoo doll donuts! I get a lot of searchers for “Amway sex” finding their way to Anna Banana’s blog. Maybe because these ambots aren’t getting any because they’re never home!? Voodoo Doughnuts can  help those obsessed with Amway sex with the donut creation Cock-N-Balls. I would have liked to copy and paste some of their images here but they’ve got some code in their web page that prevents me from copying their donut pictures.

A Google search tells me that Portland has a lot of museums and Oriental inspired gardens and parks. Not really my thing but certainly if someone held a gun to my head and told me to choose between going to an Amway WWDB function or a museum, I’d go to the The Hat Museum.  Admission is $15, way cheaper than being bored to death by a bunch of aging Diamonds ripping off IBO’s.

No one will want to miss the Church of Elvis. Its in the store window of a shop in Chinatown. Has a coin operated movie that you can plug from the sidewalk. So I’d call it nearly free. Spooky coincidence that the poor bastards attending FED will also be up and about pretty much 24 hours a day because the brainwashing techniques work better on sleep deprivation. I’d rather hear what the Church of Elvis movie has to say at 2 in the morning than the sack of shit Platinum!

House Spirits Distillery tour and tasting. Yummy! Have to be 21. There is a fee for tasting but if you buy a bottle it will be waived. This will make you forget about those nasty Amway IBO’s!

Widmer Brothers Brewing  Free tour. Free beer. Need I say more?

The Oregon Zoo  Adult admission is $10.50. A little cheaper for other age groups. It’ll be fun to visit the bear exhibit and imagine feeding your upline to the grizzlies!

For anyone really interested in visiting Portland, Oregon and doing tourist attraction things see Trip Advisor for suggestions. Most attractions are museums and parks.


  1. Anna, did you have time to go visit all these attractions as a wife of a ambot? Also i wonder if they have money to visit all the attractions in portland? Especially when the cost is 1k for hotel & tickets. I did hear some people try to save money by sleeping in their cars & eating amway bars.

  2. Colin - I've never been to any of those places. Whether or not an IBO has the money to visit those attractions after paying for the function is debatable but they likely don't have the time to do anything else but attend the function and night owls. I don't know about sleeping in the cars but they were packing them in to hotel rooms over capacity and splitting costs to save money.

  3. Anna- i would never share a room with full of loser greasy smelly ambots lol. Dont really care how much they promise me in the future.

  4. Don't forget a visit to the Pittock Mansion:

    Lots of good local history, great hiking trails and a beautiful view. Don't miss the gift shop!

    Oh, I forgot, if you're an Ambot, you have no discretionary income to spend on gifts, unless it's to gift your awful products.

  5. Connie - that Pittock mansion looks like it will be fun to visit too. Doesn't compare to Hearst's though!

  6. You forgot the outdoor activities!
    Forest park is the largest of it's kind, with miles and miles of hiking and biking trails. Powell Butte has great mountain biking as well, there's rock climbing available right in the city and there's fantastic kayak tours around Ross Island.
    Also; if you're downtown, and just getting out of a night owl, try the Roxy on Stark- open 24/7.

  7. Thanks Anonymous! Its nice to get perspective from someone who's been there. I have to rely on Tripadvisor for these destination pieces!

    Outdoor activities. Ambot. Don't really seem to go together. But just about everything you brought up looks like it would be a fun way for an Amway widow to spend a day!


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