Wednesday, August 3, 2011

101 Ways to Piss Off an IBO

This topic is inspired by that new show on TV called 101 Ways to Leave a Game Show. Its hilarious! I’d like to do most of those stunts to our former upline minus the safety equipment of course!

This post might help out the people who end up at my blog after doing a Google search for “how to get rid of those annoying Amway salespeople” or “how to tell Amway people to go away”.

Here are 101 things to say to an IBO to piss him off:

  1. Does this have anything to do with Amway?
  2. Amway is a pyramid scheme.
  3. XS Energy Drinks taste like cat piss!
  4. Why did Ganesh and Neha Shenoy get divorced?
  5. Why is everyone in Amway so phony nice to me?
  6. $60 a year membership to buy overpriced products? Are you fucking kidding me?
  7. Go to hell! Oh I forgot. You’re in Amway. Same thing.
  8. Go peddle your snake oil somewhere else!
  9. Why are Nutrilite vitamins so expensive? And don’t give me no bullshit about the high quality because that’s a lie.
  10. I read on the Internet that IBO’s lie about Artistry Cosmetics being one of the top 5 cosmetics in the world.
  11. Are you really dumb enough to believe that everything to do with Amway is a tax deduction?
  12. Does Amway sell Monavie products?
  13. Is this Scamway?
  14. You want me to come to an 8pm meeting? Fuck off! American Idol  is on then!
  15. Hey I drank your Perfect Water and I still don’t look 10 years younger! You’re a fucking liar!
  16. Why are the Puryears selling their river house?
  17. What kind of a slimeball gets involved with Amway?
  18. Did you hear Amway’s getting sued again?
  19. How many people do you have in your downline?
  20. I heard you lose a lot of money in Amway.
  21. Have you read Merchants of Deception?
  22. Amway is a cult.
  23. How come when a dog eats Amway dog food it shits three times more than it used to?
  24. I can make $115 a month working an Amway business for 10 to 15 hours a week? Do the math asshole! That’s $2 to $3 an hour!
  25. Show me your tax return to prove you’re making $100,000 a year in Amway.
  26. Who’s the liar that told you Amway owns the Amway Arena in Orlando?
  27. If you’re so successful in Amway how come you’re driving a piece of shit 1972 Pinto?
  28. I heard Amway sells prestige tampons.
  29. No I’m not willing to pay more money for quality products.
  30. That Amway food bar you gave me tasted like shit!
  31. How come you’re too embarrassed to tell anyone you’re with Amway?
  32. Why are you lying to me?
  33. Why do you have to get permission from your upline before doing anything?
  34. How many customers do you have?
  35. How much money do you make each month in Amway sales?
  36. I heard the only way to make money in Amway is by selling motivational tools.
  37. I’ll be successful just by going to Amway meetings and doing nothing else?
  38. I heard Amway destroys relationships.
  39. The only people who get rich in Amway are at the top of the pyramid.
  40. You can’t brainwash me asshole!
  41. How many grand openings are you planning to hold? Wasn’t one enough?
  42. Submit to upline? Are you fucking crazy? Cult! Cult! Cult!
  43. As a matter of fact I do like my job.
  44. What qualifications does your upline have as counsellors?
  45. Jesus Christ! Get off your fucking phone! Its after midnight! Doesn’t your fucking upline ever go to sleep?
  46. How come Amway dishwasher soap costs twice as much as other brands and it only gets half the dishes clean?
  47. Why does Amway sell towels that fall apart?
  48. Sniped any prospects at the grocery store lately?
  49. How many people you got on your name list?
  50. Your Amway upline leader says you’re not allowed to watch TV? Sounds like a cult to me!
  51. Let me give you a good suggestion what you can do with those fucking Amway tapes!
  52. Where am I going to find 6 people open to being scammed?
  53. Who gives a shit if a Diamond is speaking tonight?
  54. How come Amway’s shipping costs are so high? I only have to spend $25 with Amazon to get free shipping.
  55. Why do you refer to Amway as “the business”? What’s the big secret to calling it what it is?
  56. Who’s the fucking moron that told you Amway is the only recession proof business?
  57. Hey did you see the Dateline expose on the Amway scam?
  58. Amway’s an expensive social club.
  59. What do you mean you’re cleaning your Platinum’s house for free every week?
  60. Why do Amway meetings last until way past midnight?
  61. Show me your Amway profit and loss statement.
  62. Amway is creepy.
  63. So what if I’m a broke loser for the rest of my life. Its better than being a good for nothing, lying, scumbucket Amway IBO so fuck off!
  64. I’ve got better things to do with my life than go to your dumb ass Family Reunion.
  65. I’m trading hours for dollars? Well at least its better than being in Amway and trading hours for pennies.
  66. Why’s everything in Amway so secretive?
  67. Wow! You spend so much time doing Amway shit when do you have time for fun?
  68. If David Shores really paid cash for his house how did it get foreclosed?
  69. My wife is already free. What’s it to you anyway?
  70. Mind your own goddamned business!
  71. You’re a cult leader in training.
  72. How do you say fuck in igbo?
  73. The secret to Amway success is ripping off your customers.
  74. So what if I have an employee mentality. Its better than having a brainwashed ambot mentality.
  75. Who cares?
  76. How many Amway meetings each week?
  77. Who is Orrin Woodward?
  78. Don’t get bitchy with me! You dragged me out to this fucking Amway meeting because you wanted my opinion. I gave you my opinion! Its a fucking scam!
  79. I already am my own boss.
  80. If Amway Diamonds make so much money why did Greg Duncan declare bankruptcy?
  81. Sure I look at other ways of making money. How do you like my new printing press over there?
  82. When you’re financially free in two to five years come back and show me your plan then.
  83. I don’t punch a time clock but I’d sure like to punch you!
  84. Open your fucking ears and eyes! Amway is a scam!
  85. Why do you need permission to talk to your crossline?
  86. Been to Barnes & Noble lately?
  87. Why don’t you just tell me what your business opportunity is so I don’t have to go to your meeting.
  88. How come you have to write checks payable to cash? Sounds like tax evasion to me.
  89. Ever hear of the 15 second introduction? You should be able to say who you are and what you do in under 15 seconds. If it takes you a 3 hour meeting to spit it out you’re a fucking loser.
  90. No I don’t want to support your business because you’re too high priced.
  91. WWDB stands for World Wide Destructive Bastards
  92. Walmart has lower prices and better products.
  93. Are you stupid?
  94. It costs ten bucks to go to an Amway meeting? Rip off!
  95. CD’s cost how much?
  96. Ha ha! Did you seriously just call yourself an Amway warrior?
  97. How come there are stories all over the Internet about how much money people are losing in the Amway scam?
  98. Your upline says you have to ask permission before you can buy a new fridge? Holy shit! And you say you’re not in a cult!
  99. I’ve heard there’s some fat IBO’s. Does that mean the $500 Amway diet plan doesn’t work?
  100. What’s it like living inside a pyramid?
  101. Why does Amway ruin marriages?
Oh I’ve got more. I just promised to stop at 101!


  1. 102. How quickly can I expect to alienate close friends and family through relentless prospecting, relying on them for childcare and/or loans, etc.?



  2. Chelsea - that could be another topic titled something like "101 ways an IBO alienates people and destroys relationships"!

  3. You are hilarious Anna! One wonders if you could make an IBO cry before getting half way through this list.
    How do you say fuck in igbo?


    ***Former WWDB Lemming***

  4. Ha ha! Glad you're enjoying the blog Lemming!

    New topic? 101 Ways to Make an IBO Cry. Hmmm....

    I get one or two searchers every week who end up at my blog trying to learn how to say fuck in igbo that's why I included it! And no I have no idea what the igbo translation is!

  5. Told the the who's prospecting me he's a sucker for paying for those seminars. Of course that didnt go well. Once in awhile id text him asking how much he's made with this scam? Dont see a problem being a pest. Since they are pest to us when bugging us to buy or signup.

  6. Colin - IBO's spend a lot of time pissing off people who are not in Amway so anytime we get the chance to return the favor is good. Now you need to text him and ask him if he has any Monavie on hand right now for sale. Send that text around midnight of course!

  7. The ibo told me im a loser and to stop harassing him. If i have the guts i should meet the son of the cult leader lol. Apparently the son of the cult leader isnt working at all. He goes around speaking with his old man but cant seem to build his own iboship/business.

  8. Anna as I said in the first post where I mentioned you. Stop holding back tell us how you really feel

  9. Epic post Anna. Colin, I say meet the SOB. You can ask him how Orrin's doing, or maybe, you could ask him how the system carves up the book/audio/seminar money? (Generally, all things aren't equal which is bound to spark some resentment). Or maybe you can just hit the dick with a shaving cream pie... nevermind that could be assault... it's a fun thought though.

  10. Ha ha Peter! Did you miss my fuck you IBO post a few months ago? Talk about me holding back! Although directly mainly at my former Platinum it applies to any IBO out there.

  11. Thanks Lobotomized!

    I think your assessment of carving up the tool money creates a lot of resentment amongst the Diamonds is dead on. This is probably why some Diamonds have gone rogue and started their own groups so they can have a bigger piece of the pie.

  12. "This is probably why some Diamonds have gone rogue and started their own groups so they can have a bigger piece of the pie."
    Of course. It only makes sense that when a business/scam is based purely on the lowest instinct of greed, at some point when the wolves have devoured all the sheep they eventually set upon devouring the other wolves. (my apologies to wolves for the insulting comparison to Diamonds).

    And you are right. The list could go on and on. I especially loved #82. Because that pretty much assures you will never hear from them again.

    Some others that came to my mind "If it's really your own business, then why does your upline control more of your life than my boss does at my J.O.B.?" or "If I'm the broke loser, how come I own my house outright while you are begging family for money to avoid foreclosure?" or "If a Diamond asked you to drink a glass of Kool-Aid, would you do it without question? Even if his name was Jim Jones?" or "Does it bother you that the 'fake it til you make it' quote sounds like an old bedroom joke?" or "If you had your foot stuck in a lawnmower and it was slowly tearing you to pieces, would taking your foot out make you a 'quitter'?" or "When my childhood friend told me there really wasn't a Santa Claus or Easter Bunny, was he being a dream-stealer or just telling the truth?"
    Yeah... one could just go on forever. lol


  13. Dave - those are some more good ways to piss off an IBO. After all they use "lines" with us when prospecting so its always good to have ammunition of lines to use right back at them!

  14. Lobotomized, i didnt wanna meet junior cult leader cause im asked to wear dress pants,shirt and tie. Just told the ibo im busy and cant waste time with this.

  15. Anna,

    You should watch this training video of Ganesh Shenoy. It is hilarious to now watch the analogies and motivating techniques he uses. A few years back I would have been like, he is a very powerful speaker.

  16. Forgot the link


  17. Ha Ha, these are hilarious. Now, I'm kinda hoping someone asks me to join Amway just so I can try some of these out!

  18. Hi Anonymous - thanks for posting the link.

  19. Connie - I'm just holding my breath waiting for some ambot to come along with an Amway sales pitch. I'll use as many lines of these as I can before he walks away from me. Or runs!

  20. love it!

    **proud Amway hater**

  21. Mindblowing blog..It is so demotivating for any amway prospects to join amway once they read your blog. I must say you are preventing families from a financial wreck.

  22. Anonymous - more than trying to prevent families from a financial wreck I'm hoping to prevent them from becoming emotional wrecks. Losing money buying Amway products and tools is only one part. Its the abuse and lies and brainwashing from upline that causes horrible devastation. I get a lot of people show up here after they've signed up with Amway because their friend or family member got them all hyped up. When they see the misery ahead of them they can still quit and get their registration refunded I think in 30 days though someone else said 90 days. If I can prevent unsuspecting people from going through the hell I went through thanks to our troublemaking upline then this blog is all worth it.

  23. Ambots are like Jehovah's witnesses. No offense to any of that religion, but surely they can see the relation?

    1. They only see what the assholes in their Amway upline brainwash them into seeing.

  24. I joined Amway just to use few of the products.An Amway ABO first compelled me to attend a covention and at last moment told me that the ticket costs Rs.900.I had agreed thinking it was free.Fucking shit.Some stupid diamond ate my head for an hr or so,showing photos of their foreign trips..Damn do I care which place on earth u went.luring people like anything...For every diamond or emerald they asked to rise from our seats..I just went there to watch the stupidity.Came back learnt the lesson that I will never ever get into this crazy scheming thing.

    1. Hi Anonymous. That’s usually how it goes. You think there’s a couple of Amway products that you wouldn’t mind using even though they’re more expensive that what they cost at the stores you shop at. You pay the membership fee. Then the assholes in your Amway upline start to disclose all the costs to belong to Amway and those ticket sales are the bulk of how the Amway Diamonds make their income. And up as you figured out when they talk all it is is to brag about all the things they’ve bought and shows pictures. Glad you figured out fast that it’s a scheme. A pyramid scheme at that. It was a lesson well learned then.

  25. Just think if u would have took as much time to build Amway as u did this blog u would be successful !

    1. Everyone has different levels of what they consider successful. My interpretation of success would never match that of an Amway asshole. I could never be successful in Amway because I am not a liar, a scammer, a negative bastard, or enjoy destroying people's lives. That's because I have morals and a conscience. Things ambots have to throw out the window if they want to make a buck in Amway.


Comments are moderated but we publish just about everything. Even brainwashed ambots who show up here to accuse us of not trying hard enough and that we are lazy, quitters, negative, unchristian dreamstealers. Like we haven’t heard that Amspeak abuse from the assholes in our upline!

If your comment didn’t get published it could be one of these reasons:
1. Is it the weekend? We don’t moderate comments on weekends. Maybe not every day during the week either. Patience.
2. Racist/bigoted comments? Take that shit somewhere else.
3. Naming names? Public figures like politicians and actors and people known in Amway are probably OK – the owners, Diamonds with CDs or who speak at functions, people in Amway’s publicity department who write press releases and blogs. Its humiliating for people to admit their association with Amway so respect their privacy if they’re not out there telling everyone about the love of their life.
4. Gossip that serves no purpose. There are other places to dish about what Diamonds are having affairs or guessing why they’re getting divorced. If you absolutely must share that here – don’t name names. I get too many nosy ambots searching for this. Lets not help them find this shit.
5. Posting something creepy anonymously and we can’t track your location because you’re on a mobile device or using hide my ass or some other proxy. I attracted an obsessed fan and one of my blog administrators attracted a cyberstalker. Lets keep it safe for everyone. Anonymous is OK. Creepy anonymous and hiding – go fuck yourselves!
6. Posting something that serves no purpose other than to cause fighting.
7. Posting bullshit Amway propaganda. We might publish that comment to make fun of you. Otherwise take your agenda somewhere else. Not interested.
8. Notice how this blog is written in English? That's our language so keep your comments in English too. If you leave a comment written in another language then we either have to use Google translate to put it into English so everyone can understand what you wrote or we can hit the Delete button. Guess which one is easier for us to do?
9. We suspect you're a troublemaking Amway asshole.
10. Your comment got caught in the spam filter. Gets checked occasionally. We’ll get to you eventually and approve it as long as it really isn’t spam.