Saturday, March 3, 2012

Walk Across That Stage!

One of the things we heard over and over and over at Amway meetings was “walking across the stage”. It referred to when ambots reached a certain volume of Amway products being sold in their business or through the combined efforts of any downline they might have buying Amway products that at the next rally they would “walk across the stage”.

The bottom starter was 1000 pin level meaning that 1000 worth of points bonus in Amway products had to be sold that month. Or approximately $3000 worth of shitty overpriced Amway products.

Most ambots who reach the 1000 pin level are what our Platinum referred to as phony pins. Wait a minute! Guess what? This is a rare moment! That sack of shit actually said something I agree with!

The Amway business is built on the slogan to “buy from your own business” so most of that $3000 would be single handedly purchased by the ambot who hopefully had enough room on his credit card to afford it.

At least once. After the first shot ambots have a shitfull of Amway shit lying around the house and if the wife has anything to say about it - this better not fucking happen again! Get rid of all this shit!

It gets kind of expensive shelling out $3000/month on useless overpriced Amway shit. The old credit card can’t take too much of this.

Nor can the wife!

Both the financial hit and getting stuck with Amway shit in the house!

This was a message taunted to ambots at every Amway cult meeting. “Don’t you want to walk across the stage?”

Uh. No. Like I haven’t walked across a stage enough times in my life already. One of the joys about growing up in this part of the world is that theater classes and school plays are very common. I’ve been on enough stages. Been there. Done that. Don’t need to do it no more. Being on a stage is really no big deal.

Unless of course you’re an Amway ambot then the cult leaders make it a big deal.

This type of Amway cult meeting is called a rally. Its where the dumb ass ambots who spent too much on their credit card to get to 1000 pin level can walk across the stage. A small smattering of higher pin levels may also be walking across the stage the same day/night.

I remember going to 3 rallies. I may have gone to more but I remember 3 of them for various reasons. What happens at rallies where ambots “walk across the stage”  is the speaker tells the ambots to line up on one side of the stage in order of the pin level they’ve reached since the last rally. Of course the speaker - Emerald or Diamond - I can’t recall which was speaking has no idea who’s coming across stage except for maybe some in their own line. So he calls for the 1000 pins and about 100 people line up. They walk across the stage and they’re told to keep it short. Walk across the stage to the microphone, Say who they are and boast about the wonderful cult leaders in their upline, and then haul ass off the other end of the stage. Still takes forever. Longer than sitting through a performance of Snow White! Once those assholes finish prancing across the stage then the speaker asks the 2500 pins to get in line. And now the line diminishes greatly. Whoever has higher limits on their credit cards I suppose. For the higher levels hardly anyone gets in line and they’re allowed to talk longer. I mean shut the fuck up you cult leaders in training. Nobody gives a shit!

Rallies are excruciating because they take so long because of all those phony 1000 pins who will likely never be a 1000 pin again. Then it gets worse when the higher pins can blab for 15 or 20 minutes each. It only seems like longer!

So spend enough money on your credit card to reach 1000 pin one month and that means you get about 15 seconds of Amway fame as a bunch of cult followers watch you walk across the stage. Is it really worth spending $3000+? Sign up for your local theater production and it will cost you less money and you’ll probably spend more time walking on the stage and be better appreciated.


  1. Imagine if when you stock up at costco (costco is awesome) you get to walk across a stage and gloat about it. Ambots think theyre pretty cool. My credit card is maxed out and I got a house full of expensive foul tasting crap. I dont know about you but I think thats a great reason to do naked backflips across a stage. Look at me I own my own my own business! The rest of you suck ass!

    1. Ha ha! Yup that's exactly the ambot attitude. They're Amway "business owners" and that makes them better than everyone else. They get to spend all day watching a bunch of brainwashed ambots walk across the stage gloating about how they got there by maxing out their credit card. Most IBO's do not have downline or any customers so therefore if you're going Diamond you gotta do it yourself based on how high your credit card limit is!


Comments are moderated but we publish just about everything. Even brainwashed ambots who show up here to accuse us of not trying hard enough and that we are lazy, quitters, negative, unchristian dreamstealers. Like we haven’t heard that Amspeak abuse from the assholes in our upline!

If your comment didn’t get published it could be one of these reasons:
1. Is it the weekend? We don’t moderate comments on weekends. Maybe not every day during the week either. Patience.
2. Racist/bigoted comments? Take that shit somewhere else.
3. Naming names? Public figures like politicians and actors and people known in Amway are probably OK – the owners, Diamonds with CDs or who speak at functions, people in Amway’s publicity department who write press releases and blogs. Its humiliating for people to admit their association with Amway so respect their privacy if they’re not out there telling everyone about the love of their life.
4. Gossip that serves no purpose. There are other places to dish about what Diamonds are having affairs or guessing why they’re getting divorced. If you absolutely must share that here – don’t name names. I get too many nosy ambots searching for this. Lets not help them find this shit.
5. Posting something creepy anonymously and we can’t track your location because you’re on a mobile device or using hide my ass or some other proxy. I attracted an obsessed fan and one of my blog administrators attracted a cyberstalker. Lets keep it safe for everyone. Anonymous is OK. Creepy anonymous and hiding – go fuck yourselves!
6. Posting something that serves no purpose other than to cause fighting.
7. Posting bullshit Amway propaganda. We might publish that comment to make fun of you. Otherwise take your agenda somewhere else. Not interested.
8. Notice how this blog is written in English? That's our language so keep your comments in English too. If you leave a comment written in another language then we either have to use Google translate to put it into English so everyone can understand what you wrote or we can hit the Delete button. Guess which one is easier for us to do?
9. We suspect you're a troublemaking Amway asshole.
10. Your comment got caught in the spam filter. Gets checked occasionally. We’ll get to you eventually and approve it as long as it really isn’t spam.