Amway Love Bombers

I’ve talked about getting love bombed by members of the Amway cult when my Ambot was still a devoted worshipper of the great Amway gods but I’ve never devoted an entire post to it so I guess its about time!

What is love bombing? Here is a partial description from Wikipedia

Critics of cults often cite love bombing as one of the features that may identify an organization as a cult. When used by critics, the phrase is defined to mean affection that is feigned or with an ulterior motive and that is used to reduce the subject's resistance to recruitment.

The term was popularized by psychology professor Margaret Singer, who has become closely identified with the love-bombing-as-brainwashing point of view. In her 1996 book, Cults in Our Midst, she described the technique:

As soon as any interest is shown by the recruits, they may be love bombed by the recruiter or other cult members. This process of feigning friendship and interest in the recruit was originally associated with one of the early youth cults, but soon it was taken up by a number of groups as part of their program for luring people in. Love bombing is a coordinated effort, usually under the direction of leadership, that involves long-term members' flooding recruits and newer members with flattery, verbal seduction, affectionate but usually nonsexual touching, and lots of attention to their every remark.

Love bombing - or the offer of instant companionship - is a deceptive ploy accounting for many successful recruitment drives.

This description is very accurate of what goes on at Amway cult meetings.

These Amway phony ass “business owners” are brainwashed so they don’t realize they’re in a cult. How about a social club instead? A very expensive club but basically all Amway meetings are social gatherings and brainwashing sessions.

I worked for many years and have attended countless business meetings whether it was in my workplace or travelling to another person’s workplace. I have never greeted anyone or been greeted by a business professional with a hug and flattering comments. A handshake yes. Maybe a compliment if I like their dress or a painting on the wall.

When I showed up at the workplace I never once walked around the office greeting coworkers with hugs. Probably not a handshake either unless I was meeting someone for the first time. The only time I’ve seen or participated in coworker hugs has been at the office Christmas party or on someone’s last day of work with the company.

Its called being professional inside the workplace.

Real business people operating legitimate businesses don’t go overboard. Professional niceties is one thing.

Love bombing is something else. Something creepy that is. And it makes people go what the fuck is going on here. These people are unnaturally delirious about meeting everyone.

Seeing as how Amway IBO’s are fake business people the rules don’t apply because its a fake business meeting. So hug away is the WWDB Amway motto!

I mean for fuck’s sake I don’t even go around hugging friends I’ve known for years when we get together at a social gathering. Maybe. Depends on the circumstance like if its a funeral.

Amway love bombing. A common cult tactic. Creepy. Meet people for the first time and they all want to hug me? Like back off Amway assholes! I don’t want other people in my space. Especially people I don’t know well and especially people I already know and don’t like. And here its important to note that the fucking asshole that sponsored us in Amway never once tried to hug me. Bastard knew better than to fuck with me!

Walk into an Amway meeting held in someone’s house and everyone pounces on you and wants to hug you. Even if you’ve never talked to them before or only seen them occasionally. They are overly excited to see you and they want to touch you affectionately. All fakey affectionately. What’s really creepy is walking into a larger Amway greeting say an auditorium where a Diamond is going to show up to brainwash the masses. Everyone out in the lobby is hugging everyone else. Walk into the arena and the hugging is still going on like crazy. And the screaming and squealing as if they haven’t seen this person in years instead of last night at a Scamway meeting. And then the fake compliments and the fake attentiveness and the want to introduce you to everyone else they know so they can all hug you too. CREEPY!!!!

Love bombing. Instant companionship.

That’s what Amway is all about. Instant friends. And you’ll need new friends because once you’re inside the Amway cult you’re not supposed to associate with anyone who is not in Amway or not interested in joining up as an IBO or buying shitty overpriced Amway products.

Love bombing = entrance into the cult. We are all so loving and welcoming!

WE WANT YOUR MONEY!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!1

What about the fake I love what you’re wearing? Oh this old rag? Tell me about the book you’re reading. This woman’s banging three different guys and she can tire them all out. Where’d you get those beautiful shoes? Kmart. I love what you’ve done with your hair. Well that’s what happens when you wash your hair before you go to bed and sleep on it wet.

And all the smiling and happy happy. A bunch of Chucky dolls!

Beware of someone you’ve just met who wants to hug the shit out of you and ply you with compliments and is overly attentive to you and has a fake smile pasted on their face the whole time.

Its an ambot love bomber on the loose!

My Husband is Married to Amway!

“My husband is married to Amway!” Those could be my words but instead someone found their way to my blog by Googling my husband is married to Amway.

Been there done that. The resulting baby is a blog called Married to an Ambot!

Its a horrible helpless feeling when your husband is married to Amway which also means he’s married to the assholes in his upline. There was a time when your husband vowed to love honor and cherish his wife. Unfortunately when he signed up with the Amway cult he stopped loving honoring and cherishing his wife and he now loves honors and cherishes Amway and the Amway assholes in his upline.

The Amway cult group we were part of WWDB is better referred to as World Wide Destructive Bastards because all the assholes in this cult want to do is destroy other people’s lives.

The first thing the assholes in your husband’s Amway upline want to do is drag the wife into the cult. If the wife is also brainwashed then its easier to convince both of them to spend hundreds of dollars each month buying shitty overpriced Amway products, buy CD’s and books, and attend every Amway meeting and function.

If the wife is like me they probably attend some so they’ve got some idea of the creepy brainwashing worshipping shit that goes on at Amway cult meetings.

If the wife is like me and can’t stand the fucking asshole that sponsored them into Amway she’s not too likely to show up anywhere - whether it be an Amway meeting or a Rolling Stones concert - if that fucking asshole is planning to be there.

If the wife is like me and can’t stand the sack of shit Platinum Amway cult leader then she’s also going to avoid being anywhere that fucker is.

If the wife is like me and doesn’t want overpriced shitty useless substandard Amway products in the house she is going to go out and buy reasonably priced products that she actually needs and wants that taste good or get the cleaning job done and face the wrath of the Amway cult for not supporting their business.

If the wife is like me she’s going to say if the only customers your business has is yourself then you’re a fucking moron!!!!

The wife is not going to be at all impressed by the amount of money that is being sucked out of them thanks to her husband being married to Amway.

The wife is not going to be too happy at all the time her husband is forced to spend with the assholes in his Amway upline thanks to her husband being married to Amway.

The wife is going to hate the personality change that comes over her husband thanks to being brainwashed by the Amway cult and being married to Amway. The nice man she married has now become a condescending sneering Amway asshole who has the attitude that he is better than everyone else simply because he is in Amway and they’re not.

The husband also becomes paranoid of all things that he deems to be “negative”. This would be everyone and anything that has a different opinion than his sack of shit Platinum cult leader. Yup, the wife can thank her husband being married to Amway for the brainwashed demon ambot he has become.

The Amway assholes in her husband’s upline are now brainwashing the ambot that his wife is an unsupportive, negative, unchristian dream stealer and that he would be better off without her. That’s all part of the ulterior motive of WWDB World Wide Destructive Bastards to separate their cult followers from anything that has the potential to cut off the money supply flowing upwards to them. The only thing that brings Amway assholes happiness is destroying other people’s lives. Yet another joy that comes to the wife thanks to her husband being married to Amway.

The husband has now become a bigamist because he is also married to Amway. Cult brainwashing complete: Amway is the only thing that all ambots must truly love over and above everything else.

In this day and age most women will not tolerate a husband who has a love interest relationship outside their marriage. Some women might try to hold their marriage together and give the husband an ultimatim - your mistress or me - forgive him, go for counselling, and rebuild their marriage. Other women will kick the bastard to the curb and file for divorce. And I’m talking about Amway here not a real live woman girlfriend. Hard to tell the difference isn’t it?

Most women who say “my husband is married to Amway” - one way or another won’t be saying it for a whole lot longer.

On behalf of all women whose husbands are married to Amway I want to send a big old fuck you to the Amway assholes in the upline!

Amway Asshole Encounter

Today we’re having lunch at a restaurant. Ambot is all hunched over his cell phone with a text message. Really? While we’re in a restaurant? So I ask who he’s texting and peer over at the phone which he immediately hides from me. I keep asking who he’s texting and he finally says someone you don’t like. That could only be 2 people. The fucking asshole who sponsored us into Amway or the fucking asshole who sponsored our sponsor. There’s nobody else I don’t like. Well I don’t like no other Amway assholes from our time in their shithole cult but none have been in contact with us for a few years.

Shit! That means those fucking Amway assholes lied to us when they said they’d be our best friends forever! Boo hoo. I can’t tell you how much it breaks my heart that I don’t have to put up with Amway asshole friends any more!

So you know what this means whenever we have an upline Amway asshole encounter? Another expletive riddled blog about how our Amway upline are a bunch of assholes!

Our descent into the WWDB and Amway shithole was (no) thanks to Ambot’s friend Captain Fuck Up. Asshole ugly and arrogant prick are the nicest things I can say about him and it goes downhill from there. The bastard knows I can’t stand him. He’s unreliable, undependable, and for years his presence anywhere near me makes me madder than hell. He’s one of these assholes that if you say the wrong thing to him he’ll stomp off in a snit. So in an effort to get him to stomp off, I’m rude to the bastard at every opportunity. Yeah, that sounds like a good IBO prospect to sponsor especially after I made it very clear to him and his wife and the upline Platinum sack of shit that I had no interest in getting involved in fucking Amway again.

If that arrogant prick had just minded his own business I wouldn’t have gone through the emotional and financial turmoil of putting up with those fucking Amway assholes and I wouldn’t be writing this blog.

To this day I get after Ambot whenever that arrogant prick phones him and I point out that Captain Fuck Up is disobeying the hallowed cult leader’s orders by associating with him. Ambot argues that its not applicable because the arrogant prick quit Amway too. I say big deal. If the Platinum says he can’t associate with us then he shouldn’t whether or not any of us are still in Amway.

Damn it I wished it worked that way but Ambot still seems to be acceptable to the arrogant prick phoning him up whenever he wants something.

What really pissed me off was the time the fucking Amway son of a bitch shows up at our house at 6am wanting to borrow something. We were asleep. So was my dog until she heard someone lurking outside and then the barking began which woke us up. I had a pounding headache all day long thanks to that bastard waking up my dog. Not even an apology to me for waking me up. But what else do you expect from an Amway asshole.

I never trusted the bastard to begin with and after the Amway fiasco and the financial and emotional distress it caused me I don’t have anything to do with him. He’s not allowed in the house so Ambot has to go out to the street to talk to him if he drives over or meet him or go to the coffee shop like good little Ambots do to prospect. Shit I hope he’s not trying to reel him into another MLM! He stopped by a few months ago and actually had the gall to park in our driveway and stood there talking to Ambot. I walked over to the section of sundeck that overlooks the driveway and yelled loud enough for my neighbors to hear that there’s a fucking piece of shit Amway asshole on our property and tell that fucking Amway asshole to get the hell off before I call the cops. He left.

That must have done it because the fucking Amway asshole has not returned to our house since then. Or at least not that I know of.

If I was a fucking Amway asshole and one of my friend’s wives disliked me because of all the trouble I caused them, and I wasn’t allowed in the house, I think I’d get a big clue and stay the hell away from them. I mean how dumb can you be? Apparently not as dumb as this fucker because he keeps phoning and texting - the Amway asshole lifeline.

I can't wait for the day when karma comes to bite him in the ass

The arrogant prick’s sponsor was an Amway asshole who claimed he was Eagle. This pompous shithead was over twenty years younger than me. A single guy. Typical of his age. Mostly only interested in getting laid and figured if he got rich in Amway that would attract the chicks. I think he was an appliance salesman or installer. I can tell you I’d never buy an appliance from that son of a bitch. Just to spite that fucking Amway asshole I’m gonna buy new kitchen appliances from another supplier when we remodel and I’m gonna make sure Ambot tells that fucker he’s shit out of luck. Because of his affiliation with Amway I’d never buy anything he’s selling because he's a liar and can't be trusted. So this bastard gets involved with another MLM and he showed up at our house trying to get Ambot interested. I shut him down real fast. No chance of it happening. That fucking Eagle is part of the reason we lost money and I’ll never forget it. He was in Amway for two years when we were sunk in the shithole. Probably still is. Wouldn’t believe him either way if he said he wasn’t.

So there you have it. I don’t know for sure which one of those fucking Amway assholes was the texting culprit so they both get bitched out today. But mostly Captain Fuck Up gets bitched out because I can’t stand him more than the other Amway asshole!

Make Less Money in Scamway!

This is kind of a part 2 to my post Is $75,000 the Magical Platinum Income?

This is where I wonder why people who own their own businesses or work a job for somebody else and earn over $75,000/year - the bullshit hyped income a Platinum supposedly earns - would consider getting into Amway and take a drop in their earnings. A huge drop it turns out because only a tiny fraction of 1% of IBO’s will ever make that kind of money in Amway. System is designed for failure. If people who are considering Amway want to own their own business, just about every other business opportunity out there will bring them a much better income than they could make in Scamway.

There are reasons why people decide to take a job where they earn less income than they currently do - cutting back hours, taking a less stressful job, taking a job that’s closer to home, taking a job somewhere else in the country where they want to live. There are lots of possibilities.

But why in the hell would someone consider taking a commissioned sales job where all kinds of phony numbers are thrown at you and you’re told about all the money you can expect to make in Amway? Ha! Yeah right! Especially since no one in our upline ever showed us a profit and loss statement, their income tax returns, or copies of monthly commission checks from Amway. Nobody had any proof of the fabulous income they were making in Amway.

I think my Ambot saw all those numbers and thought after a couple of years he could just sit back with his feet up and have thousands of dollars in residual income rolling in every month for the rest of his life. I think a lot of ambots see the same thing, an especially attractive picture for people in their retirement years where they can have lots of money rolling in monthly when they do not work. There are other investment opportunities that will allow people to have residual income in their retirement years. Involvement in the Amway scam will drain the retirement savings not increase a person’s net worth.

I think Ambot saw his friend Captain Fuck Up get involved in Scamway. He met the Amway cult leaders and liked them and thought these would be a good group of new friends. Except these are the type of friends you have to pay in order to be friends with them. Put money into Amway and the tool scam type of friends. Not my kind of friends.

So Ambot believed all the lies the Amway cult leaders told him about how much money there was to be made if he got involved in the Amway scam. He’d be a millionaire in a couple of years. He’d be able to buy mansions with cash, sports cars with cash, travel first class and walk the beaches of the world.

I think the main motivating factor about getting involved in Amway was what if this was really legit. What if there really was a chance that he would be rich in a couple of years and he did not jump on the bandwagon and take advantage of the Scamway opportunity. What if Captain Fuck Up made lots of money in Amway. The thought of that fucking bastard doing financially better than him must have motivated Ambot to sign up with Scamway.

Oh in case anyone is wondering, that lousy son of a bitch Captain Fuck Up is still renting the same hovel he’s been living in for the past 10+ years, still getting eviction notices cause he’s always late with the rent, constantly having his utilities and cell phone shut off for not paying the bills, etc, etc. Lousy credit, can’t hold down a job. Yeah this is a really good person to take business advice from!

Ambot got brainwashed. He met people that he liked and the only way he was allowed to spend time with them was to invest heavily in Amway products and motivational materials. The bullshit secrets to Amway success.

Amway cult leaders promised their followers that if they sign up for Amway, attend all cult meetings and Amway functions, buy Amway products, invest in the tool scam, etc then after 2 to 5 years they will be rewarded by having residual income rolling in for the rest of their lives. And they won’t have to work again.

Such an attractive proposition to people. They don’t want to see Amway as a scam but they want to see it as their sole income source. As people get older and thinking about retiring they are probably still looking for income sources. When it comes to Amway - KEEP LOOKING!

But I think there is always that niggling doubt in the back of people’s minds. What if. What if the promised income really is true. And what if they don’t take advantage of the opportunity. And what if their sponsor is they one who gets rich and then gloats at them how they missed the bus.

Uh huh.

Hop on the Amway truck before its too late!

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───▄▄██▌█ ░ ░The Amway I DONT ░ ░
▄▄▄▌▐██▌█ ░ ░ GIVE A FUCK TRUCK ! ░ ░
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▀(@)▀▀▀▀▀▀▀(@)(@)▀▀▀▀▀▀▀▀▀▀▀▀(​@)▀ zooom zoom CRASH!!!!

Reasons I Can’t Stand Our Amway Upline

I thought I’d cover some reasons why I can’t stand our Amway upline. These are the type of things that Amway’s head office doesn’t want people like me putting out there on the Internet. Even more so than complaining about overpriced useless Amway products and overpriced useless Amway motivational tools is when you sign up with Amway you now have to associate with horrible people and their fucked up beliefs. I see similar stories on the Internet about wives (usually! - as opposed to husbands) who can’t stand their Amway upline so I am not unique! Other than the fact that I put it out here for everyone to see what its like being inside the Amway cult.

1. Our sponsor is an asshole! I realize for some people who get recruited into the Amway scam that their sponsor may or may not have started out being an asshole but as he got further brainwashed by the Amway cult for sure he’ll become an asshole or become an even bigger asshole depending on his pre-Amway asshole status! Our sponsor, aka Captain Fuck Up aka the arrogant prick, is someone Ambot has known for years. He is the most useless piece of shit I’ve ever met. Besides being arrogant some of his other finer points are he’s unreliable, irresponsible, stomps off in temper tantrums, and is asshole ugly. From there it goes downhill!
2. Our entire Amway upline are assholes! Again, whether or not they began their Amway scam career as an asshole doesn’t matter, they soon are brainwashed into becoming master Amway assholes. They are bullies, particularly when it comes to putting pressure on Ambot to spend lots of money buying expensive Amway products that I don’t like and don’t use. Ambot would be pressurized to throw away even more money on various tools to “grow our business” and all the various expenses that go along with travelling to out of state functions several times a year. And we better not even think about missing an Amway function because the Amway upline assholes will bitch and bitch and bitch endlessly until they wear you down to spend money to waste your time going to an Amway function where the Diamond cult leaders gloat about their material possessions. Costs about $700/month to be a plugged in CORE Amway ambot. Getting back to our sponsor Captain Fuck Up, disliking him means automatically disliking anyone he knows. Assholes like to associate with other assholes. Stay away from Amway assholes!
3. The fact that everyone in our Amway upline are a bunch of obnoxious assholes should be reason enough not to like them! Our upline assholes put a lot of pressure onto Ambot to go into debt, in his case that meant credit card debt. Those fucking assholes in our Amway upline were unable to get Ambot to convince me to sell our house, find somewhere to rent, and use the equity to pay off his credit card debt. That way he’d have more room on his credit card to buy more Amway shit! They also tried to get Ambot to convince me to take out a line of credit on our house for the same reason, to pay off the credit card so Ambot could start over buying more Amway shit. I mean fuck you assholes for messing with other people’s finances! Sadly I’ve read other stories on the Internet where other IBO’s weren’t as lucky borrowing money to fund their upline’s dreams and many former IBO’s have lost their homes and declared bankruptcy when they can’t repay the money they borrowed while they were in the Amway scam.
4. Monopolizing all our time. Forget the often claimed 10 to 15 hours a week working the Amway scam. Ambot wasted way more time than that! He had to prospect every person he ran into telling them about this kick ass home based opportunity where you can make $75,000/year in your spare time and beg them to come to a board plan meeting all the while denying it has anything to do with Amway. Hours spent on the phone and text messages with upline. Two or three board plans each week at various downline/crossline houses or maybe a larger function where a Diamond comes to a nearby town once or twice a month. Lowball estimate 5 hours a night for these meetings. Weekend rallies happen about once a month where a Diamond comes to town and new pins are awarded. Depends if its a one or 2 day event. Say at least 10 hours but that could be doubled. Family Reunion, Free Enterprise Days, and Spring Leadership always seem to be held hundreds of miles away. Several hours driving each way and then at least 30 hours tied up for weekend events. And that’s a conservative estimate. How many other pissed off wives have sat alone home on their birthdays while their ambot rushed off to an Amway meeting? Not to mention not getting any support with household chores.
5. Brainwashing. This is part of our upline’s strategy to separate Ambot from “negative” forces in his life which includes me and everyone else not interested in Amway. Our upline were the most negative bastards I’ve ever met going around spreading their predictions of doom and gloom and misery and the only way to escape this horrible existence is belonging to the Amway cult. Ambot stops thinking for himself and parrots everything the upline assholes say. Ambot accepts everything the Amway assholes say as the truth until he becomes conditioned to think that there is no way in hell this information could be wrong. He denies what is happening to himself and his life, separating himself from reality.
6. Liars. Call it whatever you want - all Amway IBO’s are guilty of lying. They lie about their affiliation with Amway, their success, and any abuses that might be happening in their Amway cult group. The big lie is the tool scam and how the greedy upline cult leaders are obsessed with making money at the expense of their downline. Ambot wasn’t too good at prospecting because he’d break down quickly and tell prospects that this was Amway and then he’d lie and say business is going really good. All ambots are brainwashed to say that even though none of them are making money at their Scamway business.

Add them up and this is why I can’t stand the upline and anything they’re involved in and that basically means they only thing that they’re involved in and controls their lives is Amway. Our upline is why I look at everyone in Amway as a bunch of troublemaking assholes.

Night of Hell - an Amway Cult Meeting

Here’s what a night of hell was for me when we were in the Amway cult.

Our organization was WWDB - World Wide Destructive Bastards. Our upline held meetings up to 3 times a week to tell lies about the Amway business and work on destroying marriages and families. Our cult leader started the Amway meetings around 8pm either at his house or at another IBO's house usually someone in our direct line though occasionally crossline.

Even though the cult meetings started at 8pm the Platinum told everyone that “serious business builders” always arrived at least an hour early, therefore my ambot had us arriving closer to 7pm. And how the hell would the Platinum know which cult followers showed up at 7 anyway because he wasn’t there? That would be because he has little ambot spies. Not always the person who lived at the residence where the meeting was held. You never knew who the spy was. Usually the Platinum’s henchman is the spy but not always if he wasn’t there. Sometimes the cult leader had him running other errands. So I’d say the spy was usually the fucking asshole who sponsored our sponsor - little slimy cocksucking son of a bitch that he is.

Prior to the main cult meeting, the Platinum usually held private meetings with ambots at a coffee shop where he goes over their budget, their phone list, or just generally ride their asses about how they could be doing better in “the business”. If the man was married the Platinum would convince them the reason they aren’t going anywhere in the Amway business is because of their wife and tell them the only way to succeed in Amway is if they leave their wife.

At the coffee shop counselling sessions the sack of shit Platinum expected one of the cult followers to purchase something for him to eat and drink and then drive him to the Amway meeting. However if they arrived at the house and no one of at least 1000 pin level was standing on the street to greet him, the driver had to circle the block a few times until someone who appreciated him showed up on the street. Need to show the cult leader a little more love!

So 8ish start. There are usually 10 to 15 IBOs at each meeting always the same people hearing the same bullshit they heard the night before at the last Amway cult meeting. Occasionally an ambot has hijacked a prospect to attend. The Platinum spends an hour talking about himself and his life - pompous sack of shit loves the sound of his own voice.

After an hour of bullshit the cult leader might say what he does for a business - ecommerce, runs an online business - but mostly a bunch of double talk for a good 15 minutes to half an hour because he gets distracted and goes off in a tangent. After the double talk he finally mentions the dreaded “A” word. Its like a swear word that can’t be said too often in front of this pack of goody 2 shoes. AMWAY! He starts using flash cards to present the Amway business plan. Basically eat, drink, and duplicate. Find enough people who do this and you can earn $300,000 a year.

This drags on for around 3 hours because the Platinum keeps getting sidetracked and goes off on various rants usually something negative happening in the news. The sack of shit loves spreading negativity thinking he can scare his ambots into compliance.

Its now 11pm and I want to go home, go to a bar, go to an all night folk music festival, anywhere but listening to the sack of shit Amway cult leader.

But it ain’t over yet! The “teaching” portion of the Amway cult leading begins after a short break so any guests or anyone who’s not a “serious business builder” can go home. If I can convince someone to give Ambot a ride home, I am outta there!

Unfortunately I’ve stayed for more than my share of Amway cult teachings. These meetings last another hour or two. Very typical for Amway cult meetings to last well past Midnight. The more tired the cult followers are the easier it is for the cult leader to brainwash their minds. Usually now is when the sack of shit Platinum rips into people about what changes they plan to make in their lives. “Oh yeah. I’m going to get divorced because you told me that’s the only way to succeed in the Amway business.” The sack of shit will criticize how the ambots dress, the car they drive, their haircut, the people they hang out with, etc. Mostly he criticizes the group for not sponsoring anyone or bringing prospects to meetings. He’ll talk about the movers and shakers in his downline and sing their praises for the rest of the meeting gabbing on about how those are the people going Platinum, going Diamond. Next month! Within 3 months for sure! Including him. Bypass Emerald and go Diamond! 

Not so far! Some of those dumb ass ambots are still in Amway several years after we quit! Stuck at the same level or dropped. Its hard to motivate people to keep buying Amway products and investing in the tool scam once the credit card is maxed out.

No “teaching”. Lots of rants. That pretty much sums up the Amway meetings the Ambot dragged me along to.

The First Amway Salesman

Amway Products are a Good Reason Not to Get Involved with Amway

There were many reasons I didn’t want to get involved with Amway. Some of the reasons:

1. We’d already done it before and lost money and I knew to expect the same
2. Losing more money
3. Wasting our time
4. Attending boring, lengthy meetings where the same thing was said over and over and over and over and over and over........
5. Using shitty, nasty, useless, overpriced, substandard Amway products

Of course there were other reasons, namely our sponsor is an arrogant prick and our Platinum is a pompous sack of shit. I don’t like either of them and don't want to spend any time around them. If they’re in Amway that’s the best reason not to be in Amway.

But rather than cursing out my upline I’ll go back to the shitty Amway products.

I do not use vitamins. People who eat healthy low fat meals and eat lots of fruits and vegetables or otherwise eat balanced meals generally do not need supplements. Sure enough the upline told us all these vitamins we needed to take just like the last time we were in Amway. The reason ambots are brainwashed into buying all those overpriced vitamins is because it gives them the best PV bang for your buck. That’s what the cult leaders at Amway meetings preached to us. So our cupboard ended up jam packed with just about every vitamin Ambot could think to buy.

I never felt any difference from Amway Nutrilite vitamins other than a lighter bank account. I’ve felt no difference whenever I take vitamins from other suppliers either. Maybe I’m not old enough yet where taking vitamin supplements is going to benefit me. Amway IBO’s are running around from one meeting to another and don’t get home until early in the morning that they don't have time to stop and cook decent meals. They go through the drive thru at fast food joints and cram in the burgers and fries while driving to an Amway meeting or perhaps they don’t eat at all - I mean who can afford to go out and buy groceries when they have to use all their disposable income towards buying Amway products - so they need to use vitamin supplements to balance their poor nutrition.

I hated Amway dish soap Dish Drops. It comes in a small bottle with a pump dispenser. The thing I hate most about Dish Drops is the bubbles don't last. I’m still washing dishes and I have no soap bubbles. Its not like I have a ton of dishes I wash in the sink. I have a dishwasher but I also wash by hand dishwasher rejects or items that I don’t normally put in the dishwasher. Dish Drops come in refill sizes and like the good little Ambot my husband was he stocked up on Dish Drops and we used it long after our Amway affiliation has ended. I hate being wasteful and throwing things away. I was really happy when I could switch back to better quality dish soap at a fraction of Amway’s price.

Amway also sells dishwasher detergent, little white pucks. I hated them too. After every load I’d pull dishes or plates out that I’d call “dishwasher rejects” and then I'd have to wash them by hand with the shitty Dish Drops whose bubbles didn’t last. Nasty! If my Ambot husband washed the dishes maybe the shitty Amway products wouldn't have bothered me so much. But no like the typical ambot husband he bought shitty Amway cleaning products and expected that I would just love using them. Nopers. I prefer to use cleaning products that actually work.

I finally had enough of the shitty Amway dishwasher pucks and didn’t inform Ambot when they ran out. Instead I visited a forum and saw a discussion going on about the best dishwasher soap and the overwhelming response went to Wal-Mart’s brand Great Value so I decided to give them a try. Its a powder in plastic wrap that disolves during the wash. Wow! What a difference. It actually gets my dishes and glasses clean. What a refreshing change from using Amway’s dishwasher soap! I no longer have a huge stack of dishwasher rejects. In fact its very rare that I'll have to pull aside anything to rewash by hand. Maybe two items a month.

Ambot noticed I’d switched dishwasher machine detergents and wanted to know why I didn’t tell him so he could order more Amway shit. I told him I was fed up with all the dishwasher rejects that I had to wash by hand and told him if he wanted to continue using Amway dishwasher pucks, then he was going to be responsible for hand washing the rejects.

That settled that problem!

An ambot actually doing the dishes! Don’t make me laugh. Those ambots get brainwashed by their male chauvinist pig Amway cult leaders into thinking its the 1800s and women do all the housework.

What about XS Energy Drinks aka piss water. We never had energy drinks in the house before getting involved with Amway and now all of a sudden these expensive little tins are in my fridge and the empties are littered around the house. Apparently another teaching at Amway meetings by those male chauvinist Amway cult leaders is that the woman of the house will be happy to pick up all those empties and dispose of them so the man can leave them wherever they drop. Because only the man is drinking them. Women do not like drinking piss water!

Now is a good time for me to send out another fuck you to Amway and our upline for introducing that nasty piss water and your old fashioned beliefs into our house.

Perfect Water which would be better named Perfectly Useless Water and their bullshit claims about how it miraculously cures whatever ails you. This snake oil can be yours too for $50 for a case of 24 bottles. Uh lets see. How about $3 or $4 at Walmart for a case of 24 bottles of water that don’t boast it cures cancer.

Those Amway products are the main culprits why prospects should not get involved with Amway.

And from marriedtoanambot let’s just send another big old FUCK YOU out to Amway Scamway and their scammer army of Ambots.

 

Despicable Amway IBO Ambots Should Be Bitchslapped!

I am the voice of the wives of all ambots. You know those nasty, horrible, despicable brainwashed robots who go around bragging that they’re “business owners” because Amway gives their commissioned salespeople the bragging rights title of “Independent Business Owners”.

Well fuck you Amway. There’s a lot more to being a real business owner and running a legitimate business than scamming people into signing a restrictive Amway IBO registration agreement that takes away their rights as American citizens and human beings, forcing them to buy overpriced products, and making them shell out big bucks to attend Amway functions.

I prefer to save my fuck you’s for my former upline but I’ll just send out a big fuck you to Amway. Mostly that’s because I’m still pissed off that a big corporation like them that sends out phony ass propaganda that they “care” about people and then has their employees come into work on Monday December 26 2011 instead of doing the decent thing and giving them a day off and turning the Christmas weekend into a nice long 3 day weekend that most other businesses gave to their employees so they could spend more time with their families. You can read that post here where I slammed Amway for being such a big fucking asshole because their Grand Rapids employee at Alticor who ratted them out surfing the Internet and reading my blog instead of getting their work done. Get a clue! Pissed off employees = low moral = low productivity. Actions speak louder than words. Have a little compassion for your employees especially at Christmas time. Don’t take advantage of Christmas Day falling on a weekend to say tough shit that’s just how it goes.

OK now that I got my Amway corporation fuck you rant out of the way back to the fucking upline assholes.

Amway is very much a good old boy’s club. There are no women in a position of power. There are the wives of the Diamonds who sit on the stage looking adoringly at their husband while he spouts off motivational propaganda to the audience of ambots who paid big bucks to be brainwashed. There are no women running the show. Never. Even the lousy $10 meetings the Diamond speaker who showed up was always a man. No wife in sight for these little chump change meetings.

All the living room meetings were run by either the male Platinum or Emerald. The wives never spoke. Well, they might have spoke briefly if they happened to be in the room and the husband asked them to clarify something.

All the living room meetings we attended there would only be us and another couple, a lot of single guys in their 20’s, and one or two single women also in their 20’s. For the larger meetings where a Diamond showed up the room was still predominantly male, but a lot of wives accompanied their husbands, so maybe a quarter of the room would be female.

Us women can look around and get the picture real fast, especially after the speaker opens their mouth and there is usually no doubt left. We are listening to a male chauvinist pig. Happy there living in Stepford? Assholes!

Women like me have no tolerance for these new male playmates in our husband’s lives. For the most part they are nothing but a bunch of fucking troublemakers ordering our husbands to buy shitty overpriced Amway products, shelling out money to attend Amway functions, demanding his presence at every living room meeting, ordering him to do this that and the other. These new fucking Amway playmates are destroying our lives and our relationships. Theses fucking Amway playmates demand our husband’s time and his money and plenty of both.

If the relationships can tough it out, the only thing us women have on our side is time. Most IBO’s quit within a year of registering with Amway. Unfortunately a few brainwashed idiots might stick it out a little longer but most quit eventually, except for maybe less than 5%. That would be a horror factory indeed if a woman is unlucky enough to be married to an ambot that is one of very few who stays with it, forever believing the brainwashed bullshit about the thousands of dollars in residual income that will come rolling in every month for the rest of his life.

So on behalf of women everywhere who have been tortured by the Amway cult, a big fuck you to the asshole that sponsored our husbands into this mess. A big fuck you to our sponsor’s sponsor. A big fuck you to every person in between them and the fucked up sack of shit Platinum. The biggest fuck you goes to the Platinum who is the evil bastard who carries out most of the dirty work. There may or may not be any legs between the Platinum and the Emerald but I don’t want anyone to be neglected so a fuck you to any ambots inbetween. The Emeralds and the Diamonds can share in the fuck you’s too. Miserable lying sons of bitches that stand up on the stage and scam you out of your money and insult you and call you losers if you don’t keep plugging your cash into the Scamway system.

So there you have it. Not everyone out there believes the bullshit propaganda that you must submit to your upline and you must worship your upline. Fuck you to everyone that tries to force that down your throat! Not everyone loves and worships their Amway upline and has nice things to say about them! I am living proof of that one cursing out you nasty shithead ambots.

On behalf of ambot wives everywhere a collective fuck you to everyone in our upline. The lousy bastards who’ve cost us a lot of money, cost us to lose sleep, cost us divorces, cost us bankruptcy, cost us foreclosure, cost us happiness, cost us peace of mind. You fucking Amway troublemakers aren’t happy until you’ve found some way to destroy our lives.

Not all of us are silent. Watch me. I have a blog and I tell it like it is. The way I feel about you lousy upline bastards and what you say and what goes on at Amway meetings.

The women who don’t have a voice. The women who are stuck in the Amway hell. The women who don’t like to swear even though they really want to curse out their upline, the women who have had their lives disrupted or maybe even destroyed by whatever involvement their husband dragged them into the Amway cult.

I will speak up for you voiceless women. Your upline is my upline. We are all helplessly adrift in the same lifeboat. I will say it for you. The one thing we wish on you fucking Amway ambot assholes is that you are exposed for the lying, scamming, evil demons that you are and that you go through the same hell that you put us through.

A virtual bitch slap to every asshole Amway IBO who has ever signed up a downline. That downline is me! And its always really nice to know what people really think about you isn’t it?

Top Amway Dreads this Christmas Season (or Year Round)

Consumer Reports has listed American’s Top Dreads this Christmas season:

1. Crowds and long lines: 68 percent
2. Gaining weight: 37 percent
3. Getting into debt: 37 percent
4. Gift shopping: 28 percent
5. Traveling: 25 percent
6. Seeing certain relatives: 24 percent
7. Seasonal music: 23 percent
8. Disappointing gifts: 19 percent
9. Having to attend holiday parties or events: 16 percent
10. Having to be nice: 15 percent
11. Holiday tipping: 12 percent

http://finance.yahoo.com/news/americans--top-holiday-dreads%E2%80%94being-nice-makes-the-list.html

I looked at that list and realized how it also applies to Amway and the things I dread about Amway.

1. Crowds - that would be the Amway functions we had to attend. Ambot alert! Brainwashed ambots everywhere! Lining up at the arena doors hours before the function was to begin! Fucking losers!
2. Weight gain? Hmmm I had a little trouble blaming Amway for this one other than a lot of ambots eat on the run and stop at the drive thru window for fast food because when you’re in Amway and the upline monopolizing all your time and attending Amway events there is no time to shop and prepare decent meals.
3. Debt - absolutely this will happen in Amway!
4. Gift giving - yup, having to give away unwanted Amway shit to people you know at Christmas. “Shop from your own store!”
5. Traveling - gotta bust your ass getting to long distance Amway functions and all the expenses that go along with getting there.
6. Seeing relatives - you know one big happy Amway family. Amway WWDB Family Reunion sucks! Fuck I hated seeing those Amway “relatives”.
7. Music - let’s just blame the Goad’s lame ass Amway music.
8. Disappointing gifts - everything we bought from Amway was disappointing - low quality and high priced.
9. Attending events - I hated going to Amway meetings, Amway functions, Amway rallies, Amway product launches, etc, etc, etc
10. Being nice - all those fucking ambots pretending to be nicey nice to everyone when they didn’t really give a shit. I might not have been overly rude to anyone other than our arrogant prick sponsor but I’ve been rude to that fucking asshole for many years but I wasn’t going around being all fakey nicey nice either. I just didn’t like ambots. Liars are not my kind of people.
11. Tipping - that’s a year round event in Amway and its called buying Amway tools. A big tip goes to the upline when you invest in that scam!

I followed the pattern of the Consumer Reports list when creating my list. But how do I really feel in the order of these particular Amway dreads? Here it is and yes weight gain comes last because that wasn’t something I personally dreaded when it came to Amway but kept it in because I followed the CORE list. Ha ha! Get it?

Amway Christmas dreads in Anna Banana’s order:

1. Debt
2. Disappointing gifts (Amway products)
3. Tipping (the upline)
4. Attending events
5. Seeing (Amway) relatives
6. Being nice
7. Gift giving (no one wants Amway shit)
8. Crowds of ambots
9. Traveling
10. Music
11. Weight gain

Those are actually Amway year round dreads but I’m keeping with the holiday season!

Why I Can't Stand Our Upline

I thought I’d cover some reasons why I couldn't stand our upline. Thanks to my upline I grew to really hate Amway and anything to do with Amway. This is based on my experiences but I see too many similar stories all over the Internet. That tells me I am not unique! No matter how much I think I am! Ha ha!

1. Our sponsor is one of the biggest assholes I have ever met! Our sponsor, aka Captain Fuck Up aka the arrogant prick, is someone Ambot has known for years. He is the most useless piece of shit sorriest excuse for taking up space on the planet that anyone could ever imagine. Besides being arrogant some of his other finer points are he’s unreliable, irresponsible, stomps off in temper tantrums, and is asshole ugly. From there it goes downhill! Its a really bad idea to be sponsored into Amway by a rotten bad ass fucker like him. Existing problems with this jerk ass only worsened. Bad bad idea getting involved in anything - whether it be Amway or anything else - with a miserable bastard like him who I've never wanted anything to do with. The resentment only grows.

2. Loss of money. We had already tried the Amway thing before. I knew exactly what would happen again. We’d throw a lot of money away buying expensive products that I don’t like and don’t use. We’d throw away even more money on various tools to “grow our business” and all the various expenses that go along with travelling to out of state functions several times a year. If I was lucky our losses would be a few thousand dollars until Ambot ran out of money or became disenchanted again. If I was unlucky the losses would run into the tens of thousands. I estimate $700/month to throw at investing into the Amway nightmare. How many people have that kind of disposable cash lying around? If not, see number 3.

3. Going into debt. This could be credit card debt as in Ambot’s case. Other people take out second mortgages on their homes or lines of credit. Any way you look at it IBO’s are borrowing money to fund their upline’s dreams and many former IBO’s have lost their homes and declared bankruptcy when they can’t repay the money they borrowed for the great Amway opportunity.

4. Loss of time. Forget the often touted 10 to 15 hours a week - Ambot wasted way more time than that! His upline ordered him to prospect every person he ran into and tell them about this kick ass home based opportunity where everyone can make at least $70,000/year in their spare time. Ha ha! Not us or anyone else we knew! Ambot's mission turned into begging everyone we knew and did not know to come to a board plan meeting all the while denying it has anything to do with Amway. He spent hours on the phone and text messages with upline. Two or three board plans each week at various downline/crossline houses or it might be a larger function where a Diamond comes to town once or twice a month. Lowball estimate 5 hours a night for these meetings. Weekend rallies happen about once a month where a Diamond comes to town and new pins are awarded. Depends if its a one or 2 day event. Say at least 10 hours but that could be doubled. Family Reunion, Free Enterprise Days, and Spring Leadership always seem to be held hundreds of miles away. Several hours driving each way and then at least 30 hours tied up for weekend events. And that’s a conservative estimate. I'd say the actual hour count was a minimum of 100 hours invested in Amway and the fucking upline's demands. All that time spent with Amway related events means normal people activities such as birthdays, weddings, spending time with family and friends, outings, vacations, shopping, etc are taboo until Ambot makes it real big in Amway. It looks like I forgot to mention the lack of support with household chores.

5. I really couldn't stand the upline. However I recognize that this dislike is more closely connected to the general dislike of our asshole sponsor and any people he might associate with. But eventually I grew to dislike our upline especially when it became out of control the way they monopolized Ambot's time. And money. And money. And money. And money. Oh did I mention money? But mostly I was just pissed off at all the bullshit spouting out of our upline’s mouths. I didn't want to have anything to do with those fucking liars.

6. Brainwashing. This is part of our upline’s strategy to separate Ambot from “negative” forces in his life which included me because of my lack of interest in Amway and our upline. The crazy thing is our upline were the most negative bastards around spreading their predictions of doom and gloom and misery and the only way to escape this horrible existence is belonging to the Amway cult. And yes absolutely through our association with World Wide Destructive Bastards I was in a line of sponsorship that abuses IBO’s and uses cult-like brainwashing techniques, so fuck you WWDB! Ambot stopped thinking for himself and parroting everything the upline said. Ambot accepted everything the upline said as the truth until he became so conditioned to think this way that there was no way in hell he would ever accept that the information he received from his beloved upline could be wrong. He denied what was happening to himself and his life and under the upline's brainwashing control he separated himself from reality.

7. Deception. Call it whatever you want - all IBO’s are guilty of lying. Our upline were typical Amway IBO's - a bunch of lying bastards. They lied about their affiliation with Amway, their success, and any abuses that might be happening in our group. The upline refused to believe the big lie about the tool scam and how the greedy Diamonds were obsessed with making money at the expense of their downline. Ambot wasn’t too good at prospecting because he’d break down quickly and tell prospects that this was Amway and then he’d lie and say everything’s going really good. All IBO’s are conditioned to say that even though none of them are making money at their Amway business. Its really annoying to listen to  Ambot not being truthful when I knew damn well he wasn't making any money at the Amway scheme. As we all know the opposite was true. Losing thousands of dollars.

Add everything up and these are reasons why I could not stand our upline and/or Amway and why this caused trouble in our marriage.

I hated hearing from brainwashed IBO’s who parroted the upline and claimed “That’s because there is already something wrong with your marriage/relationship”. The standard answer whenever a spouse doesn’t want anything to do with Amway.

But not one of those fucking IBO’s can explain why there were no existing problems before Amway entered the picture.

Our upline were nothing but a bunch of fucking troublemakers!

Married to an Ambot is One Year Old!

My first post was on August 26 2010 so today marks the one year anniversary of Anna Banana’s Married to an Ambot Blog!

I started writing this blog so I could get a lot of things off my chest about how we were badly treated by our Amway upline, the money we lost, the things I witnessed, and to curse out our upline. In writing my blog I was hoping it might help other wives out there stuck in this helpless place of dealing with a husband brainwashed by the Amway cult.

It became kind of clear to me as 2010 wound to a close that I was running out of stories. When you’re inside the Amway scam for under a year there is only a limited amount of bad memories to fall back on. After 4 months of blogging I was running out of material. In fact I remember bringing it up in a post I wrote earlier this year that I probably wouldn’t post quite as often because I’ve pretty much covered our Amway penance.

But just when I think that all the stories I have to tell have been told I read something that jogs a memory and I write about it. Or one of those Amway assholes phones Ambot and that motivates me to write a post cursing them out. Recently Ambot’s sponsor Captain Fuck Up phoned to say he was buying something and the price tag and wanted to know if Ambot knew where he could buy it cheaper. What? Amway doesn’t sell it? Ambot claims that Captain Fuck Up quit Amway around the same time we did but seeing as how I don’t talk to the son of a bitch I have no way of verifying that one way or the other. Someone left a comment for me a few months ago asking how do I know for sure that Captain Fuck Up still isn’t an Amway IBO. The answer is I don’t know but either way I’ll forever refer to him as that fucking Amway asshole to Ambot. I know that our former sack of shit Platinum sent the word out to all IBO’s in our former line that they’re not to have anything more to do with Ambot or me after we quit Amway. I constantly bring that up to Ambot that Captain Fuck Up is disobeying the cult leader’s orders when he phones or stops by and Ambot keeps trying to convince me that it doesn’t matter what the cult leader says because Captain Fuck Up is no longer in Amway. I say it makes no difference - there should be no contact. Yeah I wish.

In case anyone is wondering Captain Fuck Up is not allowed in our house. Whenever he stops by he parks on the street and Ambot goes out to talk to him. You’d think the dumb ass bastard would get a clue. Come on guys! If your friend’s wife won’t let you in the door that is a huge clue! Most men can figure out when their friend’s wife can’t stand them and they stay away. Most men who got their friend involved in a cult and caused a loss of money and emotional distress and know the wife is even more pissed off at him than before would really stay the hell away. Not this arrogant prick. What’s wrong with people?

So to the two most evil, hated men in our former upline - our sponsor the arrogant Captain Fuck Up and the pompous sack of shit Platinum cult leader - let me send out a good old FUCK YOU in honor of my one year anniversary of blogging. If it wasn’t for you two troublemaking bastards this blog wouldn’t exist.

I have a lot of readers, many stop by my blog daily to see if I have written a new post. I hate to disappoint them by not writing something but sometimes the well is dry. Depends what I’m doing that day too. I might be super busy or not in a writing kind of mood.

I’ve enjoyed chatting to many of you and hearing your stories. Some of the comments readers have left are very sad and heartwrenching and I always send out good thoughts that you can recover financially and emotionally from the Amway hell.

I like it when some brainwashed ambot stops by to leave a canned Amspeak response straight from a tape. Oops! Make that CD. IBOFB will be shitting his pants demanding to know where I got hold of a tape when they’ve been extinct for years. I get the typical feedback comments from brainwashed IBO’s: quitter, loser, didn’t try hard enough, negative, unchristian, lazy, dream stealer, working for somebody else, blah, blah, blah. Sometimes I have a little fun and feature their response as a new blog topic with my response back to them. Like they’re ever going to come back and read it but the rest of us can have a laugh at their expense.

A few new bloggers have even popped up in the past year: MLM Punisher, Lobotomized, and John who was writing Ambot.0 and then it fizzled. Oh wait. These are all Joecool’s aliases! I love it when a new blogger gets up and running and we can hear their story. A few people who’ve left comments on my blog have considered writing about their Amway experiences and I hope they join the blogging community one day too.

So have I accomplished what I set out to do according to the tag line on my blog?

My story of what its like to be married to an Amway cult follower. I expose the lies that our upline told and what happens at Amway meetings and functions. I leave the explanations of why Amway is a poor business opportunity or the tool scam to other bloggers. This blog mainly exists to curse out my former upline, aka the cult leaders, and to let everyone know what kind of idiots I had to put up with.

Yes, I’ve got the word out what it was like living with my husband and the Amway bullshit canned speeches he constantly flung out. Oh yeah I’ve covered many lies told by our upline. And yes for the most part I’ve left the technical explanations of the Amway business opportunity to bloggers who have more experience in this area who can spell it out in rational logical posts. For sure I’ve done a great job at using my blog to curse out my former upline! I’m sure my readers have no doubt that my upline are a bunch of fucking idiots.

So yes I’d say I’ve accomplished what I set out to do. Horrible situations that happened in our lives can benefit others only if we write down our experiences and share them. Current IBO’s and the people from Amway head office who show up to read my blog might not be too thrilled that I’m getting the truth out there about our Amway experience but that’s their problem. If Amway kept better control of their cult leaders and put a stop to downline abuse and priced their products competitively and stopped ripping off people then blogs like mine wouldn’t exist.

The one year mark doesn’t mean I’m done blogging or even slowing down as I already figured out a few months ago. Just because I think I’ve covered all the Amway horror stories I experienced doesn’t mean its so. Where do I keep coming up with this stuff?

To the women who’ve dropped me a line thanking me for my blog and letting them know they’re not alone in what they’re experiencing being married to an ambot - I say keep strong and I’m sending you good thoughts and positive vibes that your husbands see the light really soon and your escape from the Amway nightmare happens real soon.

Trade Show at Amway WWDB Family Reunion

When we arrived at the hotel we stayed at during Amway WWDB Family Reunion we barely checked in and put our bags in the room when Ambot wanted to haul ass over to the convention arena because something was going on - meaning Amway products would be out on display. For lack of anything else to describe it I’d call it a trade show but that is using the term very loosely.

Now I’ve been to real trade shows. They usually revolve around a theme: boats, home & gardening, RV’s, etc. Trade shows are usually held in fairgrounds because there are usually exhibition halls or ice rinks (no ice), etc that can be converted into trade shows and plenty of parking. There are usually a couple of hundred exhibitors, maybe more depending on the venue. Usually the people who rent booths at these events either provide products or services roughly related to the theme of the trade show. However there are always the usual suspects who show up at these events even though what they’re selling has nothing to do with the theme. There will probably be booths selling nuts or fudge or cotton candy, probably some realtors have booths, maybe some tourism bureaus from other towns, and usually some MLM’s like Mary Kay will be flogging their wares. I have never seen Amway represented at any trade show. Whew!

OK so we bust our asses getting to the arena so we can partake of the world’s most awesome Amway trade show. Its a not to be missed extravaganza for serious business builders.

Ha ha! This was the shittiest, sorriest excuse for a trade show I’ve ever seen in my life. Well what else do you expect from Amway? There were only a few booths, maybe 10. One of them had Perfect Water dispensed in dixie cups. Artistry was there and they had little sample packs of face cream. You know the use it once kind. Someone from XS Gear was there with their products. This is where Ambot ran into trouble with getting ripped off by XS Gear. He got the guy’s business card and decided to be their best customer but it didn’t work out so well.

I don’t remember what else was there. I know it took less than 20 minutes to see everything. Pretty shitty. Surprisingly enough there weren’t the hoards of brainwashed ambots you’d expect to see here. There were maybe a hundred people and that includes IBO’s and the exhibitors standing behind the tables. Of course due to the shitty exhibits it only took minutes to see it all so its very possible IBO’s were trailing in and out over the 2 or 3 hours it was open. So there could have been another couple of hundred IBO’s viewing the trade show before and after we got there.

There was the Amway registration desk and we could pick up our “kit” - as I recall a ticket on a string that we hung around our necks. There was also early bird parking passes for the weekend for sale. A real screaming deal at $20. Only available to the poor suckers who showed up at the trade show. And yes Ambot bought one.

Shitty trade show aside going inside that arena brings back another memory.

Prior to our departure I’d been looking around to buy a cappuccino machine with all the bells and whistles and I brought an extra $200 cash with me because I thought I might find one on sale this weekend. I’d seen an ad at JC Penney with a one day Saturday sale and even though we’d be out of town I thought I could still find one while attending Family Reunion. The problem is big mouth Ambot blabs to everyone and anyone that we had extra money with us. Captain Fuck Up’s sponsor - Asshole Eagle - was at the trade show plus a few others in his downline. Like its any of their fucking business how much money we happen to have on hand! I was pissed off at Ambot because these kids in their 20’s probably didn’t even bring enough money to buy meals and would likely hit us up for a loan that they wouldn’t repay.

Apparently one of the people in Asshole Eagle’s downline claimed he bought his Family Reunion ticket online at the last minute. Except when he checked in at the registration desk they had no record of it. So there he was stuck at Family Reunion with no cash, a maxed out credit card, and no ticket. Because Ambot had conveniently blabbed about the extra cash Asshole Eagle asked him to buy the Family Reunion ticket for his downline and he’d get his money back once they got it all straightened out. Because Ambot has been brainwashed to “submit to downline” even though the fucking asshole is about 25 years younger than him he willing to fork over the cash. The problem is the cashola is in my purse so now he has to beg me for the money. I am pissed. I have the cash earmarked for the cappuccino machine. Their problems aren’t my problems. But because I am such a kindhearted soul I finally agree the bastard can borrow the money.

Ended up buying a $30 Mr Coffee machine instead. Brought it into action a few times when we tried to trick people into coming over for coffee klatches when it was really an Amway event in disguise. Nobody every showed up anyway. What? Nobody likes lattes?

Where’s the damned WWDB Amway Family Reunion hotel?

I remember driving around trying to find the hotel we were staying at during Amway WWDB Family Reunion. We’d made a couple of wrong turns and then spotted the hotel - barely. It was a Howard Johnson’s that was changing its name to something else - I don’t recall what name it became. Or maybe that’s vice versa. Perhaps whatever hotel name was becoming an HJ’s. I remember seeing a tiny sign for the hotel I was looking for and I thought the address was right and pulled into the parking lot.

It was just after 6pm. I was stressed out because of the wrong turns and unable to find the hotel - likely due to lack of signage because of the name change underway. So I was  frazzled as I pulled in.

And then Ambot’s fucking cell phone rings! Shit! Scared the hell out of me! I damn near drove the car into the hotel’s swimming pool!

And who would it be? Could it be the same son of a bitch who has plagued us with about 20 calls in the past 4 hours? You guessed it! His shithead sponsor - Captain Fuck Up!

Oh, I’m mad. I get out of the car with the email confirmation and stomp inside to find out if I’m in the right hotel and if not can the desk clerk tell me how to get to where I want to go. Fortunately I’d found the right hotel and he explained about the hotel being sold and the name change confusion.

Just as I’m finished registering Ambot walks in and asks if we’ve found the right place. Jesus I would have gone back to the car by now if it wasn’t!

As we’re driving around the hotel lot to get a parking spot near our room he asks what my problem is. I tell him my nerves are frazzled and that fucking phone call put me over the edge and what does that bastard want anyway. Has he not got it through his head that we don’t have his fucking money and don’t know where it is?

If you read my previous blog you’d know that Captain Fuck Up lost his money and was stuck at home and didn’t make it to the World Wide Dream Builders Family Reunion.

Hours ago I’d had enough of listening to Ambot’s side of the phone conversation. I didn’t want to hear nothing more about that fucking lost money!

Ooooh I am still getting pissed off at that fucking idiot!

The hotel we stayed at gave me another reason to despise that arrogant prick. They allowed dogs! A fact I did not know until we arrived and saw the “pet friendly” sign.

Because the original plans were to have Captain Fuck Up and his long suffering wife join us for the drive to Family Reunion that meant they would be taking up space in the back seat, we had to put our dog in the kennel. Being high season summertime the kennel required a deposit at time of booking (I think $50) just in case we cancelled or no showed so they had our credit card number. So when Captain Fuck Up announced at 9am they couldn’t leave until the afternoon it was already too late to cancel the kennel. 4 days kennel plus 3 walks a day plus early check in was well over $100 when we picked up our dog on Monday. And yes, charged one day for every day or portion thereof - Friday, Saturday, Sunday, Monday. They were closed by the time we arrived home on Sunday night. As opposed to the dog staying free at the hotel.

Yep, just keep giving me more reasons to despise that fucking asshole!

Like we need any more proof that it is a very BAD idea to sponsor anyone into Amway if their wife has a long history of disliking the sponsor. Dragging them into Amway and the wife will add up every cent that fucking asshole sponsor cost them. I don’t have it broken down piece by piece but I put in Excel that WWDB Family Reunion tickets cost $485. Gas, hotel, food, and dog kennel total $850.

Any IBO’s out there reading this: if your friend’s wife doesn’t like you - don’t sponsor them into Amway! It only gets worse. Never better. She will end up despising you even more than she did before because now you have brought them financial and emotional distress. Leave them alone or you might find yourself featured in her blog one day too!

Dragging Our Asses to Amway WWDB Family Reunion!

The first Amway WWDB function that Ambot attended was Family Reunion. I did not go with him. I don’t remember why not. Doesn’t matter. Anytime I can escape an Amway function its a good thing.

The second Family Reunion I did go. I really don’t remember much about the event itself. The journey and events leading up to Family Reunion was more memorable. The upline were riding our asses to go to Family Reunion. The huge event of the year. Yeah, weren’t they all! It didn’t take much to convince Ambot because the brainwashing was well ingrained.

All serious business builders must attend Family Reunion. This is how the upline knows if you’re a serious business builder or not. If you don’t attend they won’t work with you. We could have stayed at home, saved our money, and those bastards would not have worked with us. Hmm, I’m pretty sure that’s a violation of Amway policy. Somewhere in Amway’s procedures it says purchasing tools and attending functions is voluntary and if you don’t purchase them your upline is still obligated to work with you. Our upline were a bunch of fucking assholes and very comfortable breaking Amway’s rules. I mean what was going to happen to them? Its not like the people at Amway’s head office gives a shit. As long as the money keeps rolling in and the brainwashed ambots keep buying their overpriced shit, they’ll look the other way.

Ambot was all pumped about Family Reunion coming up in July and blabbed about it to everyone. A normal person when they hear the words family reunion thinks of a get together with siblings, parents, aunts, uncles, cousins, and other extended family. Like real blood relatives all coming from the same ancestry. But no. The Amway WWDB Family Reunion was with unrelated people he’d never met before who promised to be his new, better family.

We were set to leave on Friday morning with our sponsor Captain Fuck Up and his wife around 10am. To make a long story short their babysitter was delayed and they couldn’t leave until mid afternoon so Ambot decided to leave without them and they would drive up later in their clunker.

Actually I’m quite happy because I can’t stand Captain Fuck Up and enduring an all day drive with that arrogant prick would be cruel and unusual punishment.

A few hours into our drive Captain Fuck Up phones to say he can't find his money he took out of the bank the day before or whenever. He can’t leave for Family Reunion. Captain Fuck Up must have phoned at least 20 times during the next 4 hours and in one of the calls he suggested he might have left his money at our house. Seeing as how Captain Fuck Up was speaking to Ambot and not me I don't know if he was demanding we turn around and return home to check our house for his money. Or that he would come down if we'd give him money. After all he was our upline which according to Ambot meant we had to lick his asshole and do anything else he asked. If he did order us to drive home Ambot didn’t tell me because he knew I’d be really pissed off. Like I need any more excuses to despise this fucking asshole. Also if I drove home I was staying there!

Captain Fuck Up’s money has never been located, in our house or elsewhere.